Got the results of my Upper GI tests - Guess What?

[NewSho 20]

I put this here, as it didn't belong on an insurance-related thread. Hopefully it sheds some light on my viewpoint.

I'm not sure why you bumped my comment from five days ago. I got the idea already that you don't want to answer. Seems like if you wanted to let the conversation die, it had already done so.

OK posting 5 days later seems untimely to you, I just saw it. You did say the same thing on this post and I replied in detail. Don't know what else you'd want.

I hope you don't get defensive to this comment, and I understand that your long band journey has probably made you cautious, but it's just a little odd that you refuse to name names.

I'm not angry (frustrated, yes but anger is a wasted emotion here) but I'm decidedly cautious. And if I've come off as defensive - walk a mile in my stilettos and you might be too. I've got enough on my plate without having 'outed' a surgeon about my experiences. Don't assume because someone's LapBand path has been rocky that it's not believable. I'm merely telling my own story and keeping other peoples' names out of it.

It does look like you're promoting a different sort of agenda than just giving us information when you refuse to answer very basic questions about your story.

Jeez, short of posting my Upper GI and X-ray's (which others have done I think) I can't think of how more open I can be here? Only the names of the innocent and the medically powerful have been omitted. I can't even post my test results until I black out all the personal details on them - including the name of the surgeons who ordered the tests.

It was pointed out in another thread a while back that you originally said you were banded recently, but then admitted that you had only been recently RE-banded and had actually had a band for five years.

Yep, that's true. I realize it's a tough one to digest, but it's absolutely true.

Unfortunately, I really was banded when I said I was: 5 years ago. I never used to post my original banding date mainly because I'm an admitted Remedial Bandster. Plus I honestly thought it was kind of irrelevant - in my mind, it didn't make me anymore knowledgeable since I didn't have what I thought were stellar results. Others have different opinions on this - and apparently some people value veteran bandsters' opinions no matter what their experiences are. I hear that now.

But let's go back a bit. After being an active band forum participant after my original banding 5 years ago - illness and complications made me unable and later unwilling to participate in Bandster online and offline support avenues. When I returned to online forums after being re-banded, I didn't want to deal with explanations. I didn't want to have to wear the banner of the World's Least Successful LapBander. I didn't deserve that title, but man, as soon as you say you've been banded that long, here come the questions about all the complications, and lack of success. It is hard to believe I wasn't up to it? So admittedly, I just came in only mentioning my second Banding date. I did it with good reason. If you don't accept them - or believe them, then that's your option.

The mistake I made was thinking I had nothing to offer. I was wrong.

Just because you don't think I have credibility because I don't name my surgeon, then fine. I now have an implanted medical device that will always require surgeons or doctors to work with it. For the rest of my life. The stakes are really high, I'm in a tight spot and I felt like I had to keep some parts of this quiet. Maybe when I've gotten to a better situation with my LapBand then I'll be in a position to name names. But not now!

I can be very defensive about the implication that I haven't been successful due to a lack of effort or dedicated on my part. Additionally, NOBODY deserves to feel like they are someone's biggest failure as a surgeon.

So It's really quite a relief to not have that pressure anymore. It wasn't my decision but if he's that vexed by having his 'failure' around - why should I name him?

Things have changed since then. He's no longer my surgeon, so I'm no longer have to be his biggest failure. The day I was no longer his patient was the day I came out of the Bandster Complication Closet. But I can't say those things if I say who the surgeon is - I'm just not at liberty to say. But if I ever finish redacting the copies of my medical records, they make for fascinating reading.I hope to get them online on a separate website once I do the long process of editing doctors' names out.

I debated posting this, because I know how you get when people question you.

People can question me, and they do. I came here, I say things everyone doesn't agree with, and that's that. So I have to expect flack. But you'd probably not appreciate having to hear an endless stream of "but you've been banded 5 years and you're still fat" or "I've been banded 6 months and I've lost more than you have in 5 years" comments. Yes, I've "outed' myself but what's the point of just letting myself be raked over the coals repeatedly because I've been banded so long with little success? It happens more than you think, I'm just more open (yes, open) about it then others who have also struggled. But seeing what I've faced makes me understand why so many struggling Bandsters stay in the Band Closet.

But I don't think it's fair for you to post all these comments that obviously illicit some doubt and questions from others and then get angry when we start questioning you.

Oh, there are a lot of things in life that I don't think are fair - and you questioning my credibility (???) is one of them. But hey, I put it out there by choice, you choose not to believe it, I can't help you. But honey, it's absolutely positively more true than you'll ever know.

As always, Happy Band Journeys to all..:clap2: