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Sometimes I Just Want To Cry......



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I feel so frustrated. If I had known that choosing to have lap band surgery was going to make my life this difficult, I would have decided against it. I'm 38 years old and have never ever had health problems. Both my parents have diabetes, as do most of my extended family on both sides. I am an excellent candidate for having diabetes, but I don't. I have never ever had a surgery in my life, until February 2nd 2012. I was so excited to finally be going to have my lap band surgery. I was mentally prepared for this. I had done everything the doctor asked of me, and had dropped 15 lbs before my surgery by doing a low carb diet, and liquid diet 10 days before surgery. I had my surgery and everything was fine. One month later I found out I had a port infection. 2nd surgery was 2 days later. Now I've had my 3rd surgery (in 4 months). I've had complication after complication after complication and I just feel mentally exhausted. No one around me understands the pains I've been going through. I have no one to talk to (which is my fault since I didn't want my whole family to know I had this surgery). I have my band in now, but my incision isn't healing like it should. I don't know what to do! My doctor said to wait and see if it heals on its own, in the mean time I keep having this fear that an infection will set in. If I find out I have another infection I think I'm going to lose it. I can't bend over, I can't lay on my side, and i'm eating everything. Any advise or encouragement would be greatly appreciated!

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I am so sorry you're going through this. Does the doctor have any idea why you keep getting these abnormal infections? Have they done a blood panel to make sure there isn't some secondary infection causing the problems?

I hate to ask, but are you a smoker?

I think anyone in your shoes would feel mentally and emotionally exhausted. I know I would.

If it continues, I'd personally seek a second opinion as to the cause of the infections. That isn't normal by a long shot.

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The first infection was a surgical infection (staph). I don't have all the same symptoms but the part of my incision that isn't healing looks similar to the first infection. I don't have pain, or redness, or heat so I'm not sure if there is an infection or not. What I have is a small hole that has turned gooey white. The doctor said I have a seroma that is leaking like crazy. It has been leaking for over a week with only 1 day of relief. I think the seroma is the reason why I can't heal properly. I have been smoke free since October of 2008, so that isn't the problem. The doctor said something about having a weird form of mrsa (non contagious kinda) on my skin that prevents me from healing. He doesn't want to give me antibiotics because of the possibility of good bacteria being killed and leaving the bad bacteria. He has not done any blood work. I would think with my history he would want to see me more than he does. I had a consultation with him 1 week after the last surgery, and the seroma was leaking when I went in. He said he wanted to see me in a week, but then changed it to 2 weeks (probably because he doesn't get paid for seeing me since I've maxed out my major medical), BUT when they went to schedule me for 2 weeks out they said the doc was going to be on vacation and put me for 3 weeks out. <sigh> nothing ever goes my way!!!! I should have changed my appointment for 1 week just to calm my fears of an infection!

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Aaahhh ok, this actually makes more sense. A seroma is a build up of fluids in the tissue following surgery. When muscle in particular is injured, it results a in Fluid release. Most of the time the body just reabsorbs it and we're none the wiser it's even happening. But sometimes, a seroma forms because it's too much for the body absorb and it finds it's way to the surface (through the skin) to release.

You've had a lot of surgeries in a very short time period, it's no wonder this seroma formed. You've been through a lot.

I'll pray it heals up quickly for you without infection. I'm so sorry you have to deal with all this.

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I am so sorry this is happening to you. I would not worry at all about how much you say you are eating. Once your body is healed, you will have all the time in the world to work the weight off. Right now you need to focus on staying as comfortable as possible, given your situation. Compression garments may help with the tugging and pulling on the port site when you move.

What really bothers me about your post is your doctor! Why is he not having any blood work done?? That seems very neglegent to me on his part. He should be doing a culture to learn the specific strain of staph since it is all not the same and you may need the antibiotics since your body is obviously not fighting it off. They whole "let's see if it heals on its own" sends a red flag immediatly. What if it doesn't?? It's not worth the risk to "see" what happens.

Doctors are also humans, and although they are very eduacted, they are not perfect. I think you need to get to that office and be very assertive with them, not aggressive but fully assertive. You should demand labs on your blood at the least. This is your health and your life and nothing to be pushed aside and taken lightly. There is no reason why you should be getting the run around. If this office does not take your well being seriously, find one that will.

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sorry you have to go through this,but i agree with the others. You need some medical support. Maybe you could call one of those Dr hotlines , usually a 800 #, where you can talk to a nurse ? He/she would be able to answer your medical concerns and put your mind at ease. Maybe look into it ? Good luck, hope all goes well!

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I had my surgery about 3yrs ago. I used aloe vera(the plant-not store bought gels) on my incisions. Its a natural way to heal. It basically dries up the moisture to heal the incision. Mine werent infected but they seemed to heal faster than what I had heard others say. Not sure how u feel about it but just wanted to put it out there. Hope things get better for you.

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bama. so sorry to read of your (horrible issues)

my heart hurts badly for you

please seek guidance asap at any time you feel your need to. if your mind is at unease, you put extra stress on your

body. and during healing, this could (just my opinon, not be helping)

please keep us posted

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Just remember you can always talk or lean on your ever loving husband.

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Great...my wonderful loving husband hacked my account....thanks honey!!

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sorry to hear your going through this. I agree your dr should be doing more to help you, clood test, wound cultures... Do you live in an area that has a wound clinic? Some hospitals have them. The are specifically to help people who have issues with wound healing. I would also suggest you might try and find an infectious disease dr. they would be able to help determine what is causing the infections and what the best treatment would be.

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I feel so frustrated. If I had known that choosing to have lap band surgery was going to make my life this difficult, I would have decided against it. I'm 38 years old and have never ever had health problems. Both my parents have diabetes, as do most of my extended family on both sides. I am an excellent candidate for having diabetes, but I don't. I have never ever had a surgery in my life, until February 2nd 2012. I was so excited to finally be going to have my lap band surgery. I was mentally prepared for this. I had done everything the doctor asked of me, and had dropped 15 lbs before my surgery by doing a low carb diet, and liquid diet 10 days before surgery. I had my surgery and everything was fine. One month later I found out I had a port infection. 2nd surgery was 2 days later. Now I've had my 3rd surgery (in 4 months). I've had complication after complication after complication and I just feel mentally exhausted. No one around me understands the pains I've been going through. I have no one to talk to (which is my fault since I didn't want my whole family to know I had this surgery). I have my band in now, but my incision isn't healing like it should. I don't know what to do! My doctor said to wait and see if it heals on its own, in the mean time I keep having this fear that an infection will set in. If I find out I have another infection I think I'm going to lose it. I can't bend over, I can't lay on my side, and i'm eating everything. Any advise or encouragement would be greatly appreciated!

**your not alone and we love you. post on here and let us know how you are doing** all the best honey.

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Please seek medical help for your wound sooner than later. It worries me that the Dr. mentioned MRSA being on your skin. This is not something that should be taken lightly. I'm not liking his , well let's wait and see attitude. Dr's can be very frustating people to deal with sometimes.

I'm praying that Jesus lays his hands on you and heals your wounds. God Bless and keep us posted.

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Just remember you can always talk or lean on your ever loving husband.

Awww, that is the sweetest message ever. = )

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I feel so frustrated. If I had known that choosing to have lap band surgery was going to make my life this difficult' date=' I would have decided against it. I'm 38 years old and have never ever had health problems. Both my parents have diabetes, as do most of my extended family on both sides. I am an excellent candidate for having diabetes, but I don't. I have never ever had a surgery in my life, until February 2nd 2012. I was so excited to finally be going to have my lap band surgery. I was mentally prepared for this. I had done everything the doctor asked of me, and had dropped 15 lbs before my surgery by doing a low carb diet, and liquid diet 10 days before surgery. I had my surgery and everything was fine. One month later I found out I had a port infection. 2nd surgery was 2 days later. Now I've had my 3rd surgery (in 4 months). I've had complication after complication after complication and I just feel mentally exhausted. No one around me understands the pains I've been going through. I have no one to talk to (which is my fault since I didn't want my whole family to know I had this surgery). I have my band in now, but my incision isn't healing like it should. I don't know what to do! My doctor said to wait and see if it heals on its own, in the mean time I keep having this fear that an infection will set in. If I find out I have another infection I think I'm going to lose it. I can't bend over, I can't lay on my side, and i'm eating everything. Any advise or encouragement would be greatly appreciated![/quote']

@bamagirl... Have faith! It will get better! And when you put that skinny little dress on in the future ... And turn all those heads.. Your gonna look back and say you would do it all over again! Keep your chin up Girlfriend! I was a size 20, now a size 9! Liz

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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