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To Do Or Not To Do...that Is The Question



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I am 34 years old and 285 Ibs. This is the largest I've been. In the past I've always been able to manage my weight with diet and exercise. This time last year I lost 20 Ibs with diet and exercise and thought I was on the right track again, but I gained the weight back plus some. I hate the way I feel when I'm heavy and I hate the way I look in my cloths.

Recently, my mother and I went to a lap band seminar because I've just been so sick and tired of the way I look and feel. A close family friend had the lap band and has shown positive results in the last three years.

My question is: I have been GRAPPLING with the idea to do the surgery or not to do the surgery. I feel like "Well, I lost 20 Ibs before with diet and exercise, and if I had just kept it up I would have lost all my weight! So get motivated and get off the couch and get moving!"

But then the other side of me is "Well, you did lose weight with diet and exercise before, but you put the weight back on and maybe you need more "reinforcement?"

Has anyone gone through this discussion with yourself before? What were some of your conclusions? I realize I have to make this decision on my own, but this has been the biggest hold up for me and I think at this point I just need some other perspectives on their own decision processes.

Thank you

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I lost "hundreds" of pounds with Weight Watchers, joining, quitting, and rejoining, between 2000 and 2011. I never quite made it to goal, and ALWAYS put the weight back on, plus some. I was banded in January of 2012 because I knew even if I did make it to goal, I'd never be able to keep it off. I chose to be banded because I not only wanted to reach goal, I want to be able to keep it off. I consider the band my insurance policy and don't ever want to have to live without it!!

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Toddy couldn't have said it any better! I know that I will be able to maintain this weight loss with the band, and with the band only! Lord forbid anything should ever happen to it! Did I say I love my band?!!

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I can't tell you how much weight I have lost throughout my entire life. The ups the downs, its tiring. Putting the weight back on as fast as it came off. Ugh! The stress alone of doing this, its pure torture!

Never give up, thats the key. I think that is one of the reasons why I lost and gained and did it all over is because I wouldn't give up on myself. You can't, you are the only one that can take control of your life, nobody else can do it for you...

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I have never been able to manage my weight well at all.

Over the last 30 years I have been on every diet known.

Would start out well, then fail, sometimes gaining back more than I lost.

So I needed surgical intervention, that no matter what I may want to do, the band will physically prevent me from doing the wrong thing like over eating.

And I have to say that is exactly what it is and has done.....

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You sound just like the rest of us!

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You sound just like the rest of us! We can all diet an exercise but always gain it back and then some!

Sounds to me like the band is the tool for you :).. If your willing to diet and exercise the band will be very helpful with Portion Control to keep you on the right track.

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I told myself if I couldn't lose a certain amount of weight in a year, I'd seriously consider the surgery. When I inevitably failed AND clocked in at my highest ever, 326lbs I realized I couldn't do this without some sort of help. I weighed the pros and cons. But really my problem has never been losing weight, it's keeping it off. I am happy with my decision and feel so much healthier already.

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Just do it! I pondered about it for 8 years- hate that I waited all that time. Best decision I ever made.

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I think the majority of us have dealt with years of yo-yo dieting. Lose 50, gain 75, lose 30, gain 45. I'd be willing to bet I've lost my own body weight and gained it back at least a couple times.

Honestly, I wish the Lap-Band was an option back when I was your age. I wouldn't have had to live my entire adult life a fat miserable mess. Ultimately the choice is yours, but the sooner you take control of your weight the better off you'll be on all levels.

Best wishes to you!

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Khaylar,

I have gone through the same thing! I am just a few years older than you (37) and have tried ww and lost, gained, etc... I finally one day looked I the mirror and didn't recognize the fat person in the mirror! That was the end, I went to a seminar the next week started the journey to be banded. I have been banded for almost four months and have lost 30 lbs since the surg! I am starting to like and recognize that person in the mirror again! I wouldn't change a thing! Very happy with it!! :)

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DO IT!!! I was your age when my weight got out of control and I have been up and down for 20 years. I'm getting banded 7/20/12 and so excided that this roller coaster ride is over. Don't be like me 20 years down the road and think why didn't I do this years ago.

I'm new on this site and know I will have thousands of supporters and so will you!!

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the decision has to be yours but I agree with the rest, don't waste anymore time being overweight! this is a big change, it will change everything. I have never been a person who exercised, now I wouldn't miss it. I have always loved all the information about nutrition but never applied it to my life, now I do!

I do have to say, this forum has helped me a whole lot! it really helps to hear the good, bad and ugly on the days when you don't want to talk to people who don't know how this feels.

I also love that we display our weight & usually discuss what we are eating. it all helps me to be more accountable, not only to myself but to the friends on this site!!

Good luck, keep us informed and read, read, read some more from people on this forum. make the rest of your life a healthy one!

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I am in the same place. I am not quite at my heaviest (only about 10 pounds away, though) and I have some friends who have been successful with the band. For a long time I wouldn't even consider it, because I thought I could lose the weight without the band. One of the local deejays is talking about her journey with gastric bypass, and it during one of the ads for her show, it just clicked with me that the lapband just might be the right tool for me. I have just started the process, had my initial appointment last week, but I feel good about it. I am also not very good at sticking with WW, Jenny Craig, etc. The band will be my insurance policy for Portion Control and sticking with the plan. Good luck!

Heidi

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I'm in the same position as you are.

I know I could lose the weight or at least some, I did it before, but honestly, I am tired. Tired of doing it again and gaining it all back. For some the lap band might seem like a "lazy" solution. My boyfriend is telling me that he doesn't understand why I just would not stick with a diet and a workout, and he will put a plan together for me, but he doesn't understand the frustration I feel. I've been there done that hundred times and this was it. My knees hurts, my fat rolls out of my jeans, nothing fits nice, I'm out of breath after 20 minutes of walk, and I want this to be over for good. Lately my boyfriend came around the idea qnd started to support me, so does my family, so the decision is really been made in my mind, it is only matter of months before I'll have my band.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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