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Letters to loved ones....



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I know this may sound morbid, but did anyone write letters to loved ones in case they died on the table? I am being banded on Thursday and I am struggling with this. I suppose I think that if I write letters I may be admitting that there is a chance I will croak.... Of course, if all goes well I will rip the letters up and no one will be the wiser. Any thoughts?

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Darling, do you write a letter to a loved on everytime you ride in a car or walk out the door? Your chances of dying on the table are much less than being killed on the street.

You'll be fine, you just have the preop jitters, which is quite normal.

Here's a big hug, now focus on what you'll need when you return from the hospital, good luck.

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I wouldn't focus on something so morbid. I know surgery is scary, but you will do fine!!

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Many people have. There was a similar thread on this not long ago. It helps some people feel like everything is in order in case the worst possible scenario becomes a reality. If it makes you feel better, write your letters. But I agree with HarleyNana, chances are very slim that you won't return safe and um.. sore from surgery. :)

*hugs* Hang in there, you'll be fine.

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I wrote one to my daughter .. just in case and showed my husband where to find it should anything happen. It made me feel more at peace w/ the surgery, but perhaps that's just me.

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I wrote letters, bought a large life insurance policy, made out my will as well as my living will. I didn't want my husband to struggle with anything decision wise or financially if god forbis anything happened to me. The letters were to my 2 boys, a whole slew of them, for special occasions like graduation, marriage, birth of their first children etc.

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I emailed DeLarla and gave her my phone # and asked her to check up on me if I didn't come back to this website. Looking back I was SOOO freaked out because I had never had surgery but it was seriously no big deal. I came out of the aneshtetic better than when I had a twilight sleep for a colonoscopy. I'm not scared of surgery anymore, and NOONE has ever died in band surgery. I think a few people have died of complications but it's just times like the surgeon nicked thier stomach and they had problems but didn't go back for follow up. Point is, everything will be fine, and if something doesn't feel right afterwards, call your doc! Anyways, you'll be fine!!!!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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