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I am beginning to wonder if my husband has been replaced by an alien. He certainly doesn't seem to have paid much attention to what I can/can't eat . Now if i was new to this then it wouldn't be a problem but I have been banded 3 years in June.

So let me explain.

I worked today, hubby didn't. Generally when this happens he will cook dinner.I got home from work at about 5pm and he was cooking chocolate chip muffins. Not a major problem except that lately is seems that every chance he has he cooks some kind of cake or dessert. He obviously knows that I have a weight issue but lately my daughter has been struggling too.

I saw that he had a jar of some kind of sauce out so asked what he was cooking. He said chicken curry. Now that sounds great - a nice curry with lots of sauce, made from nice moist thighs and with a little bit of rice = no problem. I did mention that I didn't want to eat late tonight. I was struggling with reflux last night which could have been from eating too late. He said not a problem, it wouldn't take long. So did he start cooking it? No, he then proceeded to bake 2 zucchini cakes.I understand why - we have stacks in the garden and it is 1 way of using them up. But 2 cakes on top of the huge batch of muffins?????

I have no idea what time he eventually decided to start cooking dinner but at about 7.15 he comes to me and says he has a problem, the rice isn't cooking. Turns out he had put the rice in with the chicken and put the casserole in the oven. (Some type of chicken Biryani). Now generally that is a dish that takes a long time to cook and can be quite dry plus of course the proportion of rice is really high. At about 7.45 I gave up waiting and decided to eat some frozen veggie cannelloni . Not very exciting but quick and easy to eat.

Hubby then apologised about the food being late and told me what he was cooking. I told him well it wasn't a problem as it was unlikely I would have been able to eat it anyway - too much rice.He then mentioned that he had used chicken breast which he knows I don't buy or eat because they are too dry. When I said that he knows I don't eat that he said yes he knows but he forgot!

I know men can be a bit dim sometimes(sorry guys) but really this takes the cake.

I know I should appreciate the fact that he cooked but to make a meal that was so obviously something I would struggle with and to have it ready so late(they ate at about 8.30) when I had said I wanted to eat early is so annoying.

MEN. Who needs them!!!!!

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Oh dear, that must be so frustrating! My biggest beef about my hubby today was that he wasn't ready to head off for our bike ride when we had agreed. And he had been caught on the phone to the insurance company so it wasn't really his fault.

Good luck

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I hear you....my husband bought me a big box of candy for Valentine's Day. I appreciate the thought but CANDY?? i agree with you... my man can be dim sometimes too....LOL

Thanks for the laugh! I hope you have a great day!!

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My hubby's idea of cooking dinner is getting fried chicken take out, which I won't even brave now that I have good restriction. Seriously?!?!?

He at least asked me if I wanted a side of red Beans and rice or mashed potatoes, both of which I turned down. I ended up eating one of my frozen high Protein Soups instead. But the smell of the fried chicken drove me crazy!!!

Sometimes they need a smack on the head with the frying pan!!!

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Is my husband living in your house?

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I think some spouses (or is it spice?!) can be a little insecure to see their husband/wife lose a lot of weight. I don't think they mean to sabotage, but that's exactly what it is. It's something we all have to be very careful about. I wish this was a journey I could experience with my husband, and while he is a little overweight, I just don't think he'd qualify, although he did show interest in the beginning.

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LB4ME I think he might be!

Toddy I don't think he is deliberately trying to sabotage me as he prefers me slim, I just don't think he thinks sometimes. I also think that he forgets that weight is a constant battle - he probably thinks that now I am at goal that I can eat what I want and not regain.

If only that were true.

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Last night my husband surprised me with dinner. He made peanut noodles and an apple tart for dessert. He also made a dip with toast points. Hello. I haven't had Pasta or regular bread since surgery. I guess I should be happy that he made dinner. I just picked around what i could eat.

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Gotta love them! Mine keeps bringing chocolate bars and chips and licorice up from the pantry (in the basement and I avoid it like the plague) and then proceeds to watch golf of television (most boring thing ever) and offering me bits of whatever he is munching on. He's thin, so this isn't a problem for him and I think he must forget that, that stuff is one of the reasons I am fat. He doesn't cook often, so I haven't run into the full meal bad deal, yet!

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No offense to the men reading this, but they are oblivious to the obvious sometimes. My dbf doesn't know I have the band, but I tell him I'm trying to watch my carbs. Yesterday he brought me Breakfast in bed with pancakes, toast and salty eggs, so I couldn't eat the eggs so I had the toast grrr.

Every other week I cook dinner at my house on Saturday nights and I'm horrible with time management by the time I'm done cleaning, doing laundry, etc it's time to make dinner, and he's usually hungry when he come over, so he suggested I (not him) make an appetizer for him that'll be ready when he gets there (oh excuse me! LOL) so I have a whole folder of appetizers ranging for extremly healthy to artery cloggers, and what does he pick out? A bacon dip! Ugh, what we do for men. LOL.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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