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Who Have You Told You Were Banded?



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I will have surgery 2-20 and I afraid to tell anyone because i don't want them to judge me just in case i don't loose any weight.. What sould i do???

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I would be mad too..my hubby better not run his mouth. It's really no ones business. I don't plan on telling anyone but my best friend and my husband knows of course and my kids. Some people will never understand what it is like to be obese and trying every diet known to man to only fail numerous times again and again. I say keep it to your self..

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I will have surgery 2-20 and I afraid to tell anyone because i don't want them to judge me just in case i don't loose any weight.. What sould i do???

HappyMEE --- you should get in a better frame of mind... If you are setting yourself up to NOT LOSE any weight...........it means you haven't used the LB as a tool.....

In addtiion to the LB surgery, you need to change how/what you eat and also get into an exercise program....

I had my surgery 3 years ago - and can not imagine someone having it and NOT losing weight---

it IS difficult --- the weight did not come off easily -- and it doesn't STAY OFF easily - I still struggle EVERY DAY with eating.

I am NOT hungry --- I eat because i LIKE TO EAT!!!!

I have seen people lose 100 lbs after LB surgery -- and now they have gained it all back --- because they have learned how to eat what they want......

Set yourself up to do well -- succeed!!!!

It takes lots of effort and work --- YOU CAN DO IT!!!

Good Luck!

and p,s. I told EVERYONE --- so that I could be held accountable.

I felt if I did NOT tell people --- then I wouldn't have to be worried about getting caught eating food........etc.

I needed help to lose weight - the LB was one tool, having others watch and see was another.........i enjoyed the "negative Nelly's" -- they motivated me to do the right thing!!!

GOOD LUCK!!!!!

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I'm getting banded in March and I'll telling the world. Then I will know that they are watching me so hopefully the more eyes on me I will work harder.

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I guess I'm a little like the initial poster - I want some time to get used to the idea, and am keeping it to myself for now. I would feel very hurt and betrayed if my spouse or family told others about it when I specifically asked them not to.

So far only my mom knows, since we are getting it done together. She has told my dad she needs a hiatal hernia repair. I am telling my husband this weekend. I didn't want to say anything until I was sure I was covered for surgery and didn't have to pay out of pocket.

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@Quinnmic are you saying your mom lied to your dad about what she is doing?

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yeah... I totally don't agree with that but I think she is embarrassed

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she "says" she's going to tell him after the surgery.... but at the same time, I think he will notice that she's eating differently.... she also asked me not to say anything to anyone else in our family, so who am I to out her... I think she'll need more support at home, but I guess she thinks she'll have me to lean on, since we only live about 5 min away from each other

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I was very selective at first. I was banded on November 18, 2011 and walking into surgery, my parents and boyfriend were the only ones I'd shared with. I was optimistic about the band and new in my heart I was making the right choice for me. The position I didn't want to get into was defending my decision to anyone. It was my choice to make and one I didn't make lightly. I researched for a long time before finalizing my plans. That all being said, I live in a two family home with my "father in-law" downstairs. I was worried he might think I was sick. We have dinner together a couple times a week so he would notice a huge difference in my eating habits. Added to that, Thanksgiving was the following week and I was on liquids. My boyfriend was the one to tell him. After being asked for my reasons, we were able to move on. When he understood that I was concerned with the sleep apnea, diabetes and other weight related health issues, he was very understanding. I want to be around for my 5 year old son. That was my biggest reason for making this decision. A decision I would make again. I don't regret having the lap band surgery, I just wonder why I didn't try this sooner.

My last comment would be, it's ok to be upset at him for saying something, but did you ask him why he told her? Perhaps he needed someone (from outside the situation) to talk to about what you would be dealing with and going through. Maybe he had concerns he was afraid of sharing with you. Just a thought. Best of luck in your future success.

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I had my surgery on Dec 22nd. I have only told a few select people. I only 3 people at my work, however, since I work for the hospital where I had my surgery done, one other person in my office found out and confronted me on it. I told her that it is a personal decision and I dont want other people knowing. After she confronted me again, I went to the manager and filed a HIPPA complaint. She was told that she is not to discuss it, and at this point, I dont think anyone else knows. I told my ex-sister in law (because I needed her to babysit my kids the day of surgery) and she has been extremely negative about the surgery. (she has only spoken to me twice since surgery!!) She has never had a weight problem, and I think she truly does not understand. I love having my band, and actually get to go for my first fill today. I have been at a plateau with my weight since surgery, so looking forwawrd to having my fill and seeing the scale going down once again.

Having the surgery is a VERY personal decision. You have every right to choose who knows that you had it done. I am not keeping it a secret per se, however, I would rather see the weight come off before I announce that I had the procedure.

Keep your chin up, now that they know, there is nothing you can do about it, but show them what a great decision it was for you to have this done.

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Wow, I would be upset too.

By the way, I tell ANYONE who asks the question "How did you lose the weight?" I'm pretty open about my band.

But that decision is a VERY personal one and people should respect you for that.

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I've told a number of people.....

My family. Parents' neighbors (we're all friends). Friends of the family. Numerous co-workers. My boyfriend.

But then there are also a good number of people who don't know. I don't mind people knowing, but I don't make it a habit to tell everyone I come across unless there's a reason for me to do so.

The good thing is that being successful at losing weight with the lapband can also be an inspiration for other people to have the surgery and change THEIR lives. A co-worker that I shared an office with was somewhat discouraging when I had the surgery. Not like "You shouldn't do it", but "I've known this and this person that it didn't work for". Well, my surgery was 2.5 years ago and during that time, she has watched me lose over 100lbs. She, herself, is overweight. So in November she had the surgery done, saying that I was her inspiration. She has lost close to 50lbs at this point and couldn't be happier that she made the decision to do it.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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