Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Depressed and confused



Recommended Posts

Doreenviv ....The banded life and what some can tolerate and can not tolerate is nothing but a learning process. You didn't get to 200+ pounds overnight and you can't expect to loose it that fast either. Everyones journey is different, everyones triggers are different and everyones relationship with food is different. For me personally it was bread. I had my surgery just about a year ago .. I got stuck / PBing on bread many many many times before I just decided to remove it from my diet. Now why after 20 attempts at bread making me miserable & sick I thoughtg for 1 minute the 21st might be succesful I don't know but you bet I tried. Probebly another dozen times before I just decided it wasn't worth it. Not one of us is perfect, my choices arn't perfect, I don't follow the rules perfectly I strive for 5 good days out of 7 right now and thats after a year. Even now after a year and a fill of 7+ cc's I could eat 2 slider size hamburgers .. just now I do it without the bread. Takes a very long time to change old habits .. keep plugging away. Don't beat yourself up over imperfect choices or days .. aknowledge you had it and move on, you can't let it throw you or the next thing you know your emotional eating and you have ruined 2 days, 3 days maybe 4 ... a week..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This was very helpful information about the stomach muscles and explains a lot of what I have had problems with lately -- thanks for explaining this!

Doreenviv, I had the same problem for a while about needing to PB right after I started eating. I think I was doing it just about every day for months, and when I talked to my surgeon about it, he explained it like this.

Your stomach has three strong muscles around it. These muscles are the ones that contract and relax, moving food through your system (and also cause your tummy to "growl" when you're hungry).

For a Bandster, we often don't have a lot in the stomach if we are not snacking between meals. When you sit down to eat a meal, these muscles are eager to go to work and are very stimulated when you smell the food, see the food, and first bite goes in and chewing starts. The stomach anticipates the food about to arrive and the muscles clench up all the way to the opening of the band. So if you eat too fast, with bites that are too large, the food can't go down at all and you'll start sliming and usually end up bringing it back up. My surgeon told me that the first 2 to 5 bites are critical in a meal.

So, what I've done is literally take a pea-sized bite as my first five bites, and take about 30 seconds between those bites with my fork down. I chew until it's disintegrated, and I'm not really swallowing as much as it just disappears. Once my stomach realizes that there's more food coming, it relaxes and I'm able to eat and not PB.

This may not work for everyone, but it took me five months to finally get some answers to this and I have not PB'd since I started doing this except for some scrambled eggs the other morning (which I'm always tight in the morning and usually I don't eat at all). I also found that definitely not drinking during a meal has helped and was also a cause of PBing - I make sure I don't accidentally drink by not even having a drink next to my plate. If I dump a bunch of liquid on top of anything I definitely will be seeing it again!

As for the two hamburgers - I haven't been able to sucessfully eat white soft bread since the day I was banded, but that's just me. With fills, your band opening is about the circumference of your pinky finger - it's not easy to get larger items down it, especially if it swells up.

Good luck, I hope this helps you as it helped me!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hello my fellow bandsters,

I need answers please!! I had my 2nd fill a month ago ( I have 4 cc's ) so far and will have my 3rd fill next week. My problem is that I have gained 5 lbs in the last week and when I eat after the first or 2nd bite it gets stuck ( maybe I'm not chewing enough ) I don't know. COULD my band have slipped or is it that I do need my next fill and need to chew smaller and longer? Oh and I had a floating hiatal hernia and my surgeon fixed it but my band had to go up higher then normal which is better for me she said. I'm really getting depressed about gaining the weight. A weeks ago I was able to eat 2 burgers Buns and all. SHOULD I be concerned or do I just need another fill???? Any suggestions or help would be appreciated!! Thanks.

Are you maybe drinking too much when you eat? That will make things "slide" down quicker and easier and you'll eat more.

Also, if you are taking too long to eat, you can eat more. About 20 minutes is all it should take. If you go longer than 30 minutes, you begin to digest what you have eaten and make room for more.

I should know, these were two of my tricks I used for eating around my band when something tasted good. Its the reason I gained back much of my weight. I had to do alot of work to "fix" my head and now I am back on track and stronger than ever!

Good luck to you!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hello my fellow bandsters,

I need answers please!! I had my 2nd fill a month ago ( I have 4 cc's ) so far and will have my 3rd fill next week. My problem is that I have gained 5 lbs in the last week and when I eat after the first or 2nd bite it gets stuck ( maybe I'm not chewing enough ) I don't know. COULD my band have slipped or is it that I do need my next fill and need to chew smaller and longer? Oh and I had a floating hiatal hernia and my surgeon fixed it but my band had to go up higher then normal which is better for me she said. I'm really getting depressed about gaining the weight. A weeks ago I was able to eat 2 burgers Buns and all. SHOULD I be concerned or do I just need another fill???? Any suggestions or help would be appreciated!! Thanks.

This happens a lot to me right after a fill and it is especially hard in the morning. I always drink a hot cup of tea (decaf of course) first thing when I wake up and 15-30 minutes before the meal and it really helped reduce the sliming and PBs

Oh and if your band had slipped you wouldn't be able to hold down anything not even water! and you would have known when it slipped it would have been terribly painful. My husband works in a bariatric center and sees this happen and the person definitely knows (btw thats not how I met him HAHA!"

Good Luck! You'll find your grove!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My surgeon has given me a diet plan and I follow it to a T. I eat eggs, Protein powders, skim milk,Greek yogurt, chicken, fish, veggies and a little bit of fruit, That's it. As you can see by my ticker it's a very slow process,

I dont think 33 pounds in two and half months is slow! Dont sell yourself short! We arent ice cubes melting away

Great Job!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

i miss bread! i just had my FIRST fill after 10 monthes with the empty band...i started gaining and was very upset...now that i have my fill i feel like the only thing going down is soft foods still!! arg....i dont want to say it may be too tight tho, because im afraid i'll end up with no Fluid and gaining again?! i feel your pain ( in my chest) i vomit daily :(

Hello my fellow bandsters,

I need answers please!! I had my 2nd fill a month ago ( I have 4 cc's ) so far and will have my 3rd fill next week. My problem is that I have gained 5 lbs in the last week and when I eat after the first or 2nd bite it gets stuck ( maybe I'm not chewing enough ) I don't know. COULD my band have slipped or is it that I do need my next fill and need to chew smaller and longer? Oh and I had a floating hiatal hernia and my surgeon fixed it but my band had to go up higher then normal which is better for me she said. I'm really getting depressed about gaining the weight. A weeks ago I was able to eat 2 burgers Buns and all. SHOULD I be concerned or do I just need another fill???? Any suggestions or help would be appreciated!! Thanks.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you ALL for your advice it is helping me greatly and I appreciate each and every post good or bad. I had my 3rd fill today and I'm at 5 cc's now so lets see how it goes. 2days liquids and 2 days mushies before returning to solid foods. I hope I will feel restriction again. My Dr. said it's normal and my band didn't slip. So happy about that! Again thanks all :).

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you ALL for your advice it is helping me greatly and I appreciate each and every post good or bad. I had my 3rd fill today and I'm at 5 cc's now so lets see how it goes. 2days liquids and 2 days mushies before returning to solid foods. I hope I will feel restriction again. My Dr. said it's normal and my band didn't slip. So happy about that! Again thanks all :).

\

I got my third fill today and am now up to 5 cc. He had initially put in 2 cc to make it 6 and I couldn't get any Water down. It was a very creepy, painful feeling. Hopefully now we will both get the green we have been desperately needed!! Good luck to us both!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×