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Have you lost your "Wild Thang" urges?



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Another thread prompted me to start my own thread. Since being banded and losing weight I have totally lost my libido. I feel like it zilch, but may do it for my other half once a month or so because the poor guys needs it ;) ...so he says. Anyway if you dont find it too personal can you let me know if this has happened to you. I know most people I have talked to have had a huge boost in their drive since losing weight, I wish it was me. Is there any natural or prescription enhancers or things to put you in the mood?

Help me please, my wedding is in September and I know I am going to have to do it then and I would really like to enjoy it too :Banane23:

Delarla...i know you have got some ideas coming my way ...I hope :):clap2:

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After seeing Heathergurls V day present to her hubby maybe I should be talking to her about my problem hehe ;)

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I have felt an increase in libido all because of my new self confidence. I flirt with men all the time (too bad I'm married and wont act on it) Buy yourself something sexy, cute bra and panties I find wearing something "naughty" under my clothes makes me feel more sexual then when I am in the good old granny panties and worn out bra. Another libido enhancer and great relaxer.... buy yourself some "toys" (talk to Delarla about that one)

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I think, for me, it's partially due to this time of year. I can't shake the frumpies, and my libido is zilch! I don't even WANT to get it back! Stress, stallled weight loss, shorter days, not enough exercise, not enough "sunshine" in my life, just plugging along. :Banane23: and ;)

I'm waiting it out. It will come back. When I can get a half hour walk in every afternoon in a few weeks (it's too dark when hubby comes home), that will help tons.

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kellie

What makes YOU feel sexy? I love getting all primped up and putting on sexy lingerie. That makes me get in the mood very easily.

Try getting some new clothes or lingerie and maybe that will help. I wouldn't know what to do if I wasn't always horny! ;)

Good Luck! IT will come back!

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I would go talk to your doctor about this. Some folks experience a hormonal change after banding, and you've lost a whack of weight. Fat holds estrogen, and you've just dumped a large amount of it into your system. A sudden loss of desire and libido could be a sign of something serious.

Oh, all the other suggestions are good too.

But "duty fucks" are bad for you, I believe this in my heart of heart. I was a navy wife for many years, and that's what we called them. When you reduce sex to a chore you are reducing yourself and your relationship. (I firmly belive that sex and passion are gifts from the gods.) Instead of creating a sense of intimacy and closeness, duty fucks don't do a damn thing for you.

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Mine is increasing... A LOT.

Hmmmm, maybe gotta get my wife on the bandwagon... it's no fun alone... well it can be, but your arm will get sore.

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Well, my sex life never sucked, even at my heaviest and now that I have lost my husband still treats me the same as he did before. I look at myself more and feel better about myself. Yeah, we have the treasure chest of toys and our friends always talk about 'the closet' :omg: But we don't use them as much as people would think. We just have a variety to choose from! ;) I would talk to to your OB/Gyn or regular physician about it. There might be an underlying problem that you do not know about. I knew people that talked to there doctor and didn't feel depressed but were diagnosed as depressed and put on stuff like Paxil or Prozac and it gave them a new lease on life. You never know what can help. Pop in a porno and see how that works! Sometimes all it takes is that one long, deep, passionate kiss out of the blue that sends a shiver everywhere and gets the blood pumping. You know that feeling when you first met? That is the best when you get it back in one hot kiss or just a sweet glance that makes you blush from across the room. Stare for no reason...get him thinking. The sexy lingerie can work, change your hair, a different perfume, music...full face of make-up is sexy too with your hair done up sexy....and candles....set the mood and let everything fall into place.

Okay....now that I have said this I want to go into my hubby's office and lock the door!!! We work together. :Banane23:

Be creative and adventurous and most of all spontaneous and have fun!

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Kellie I think you need to make a trip down to Houston and drink the water!!! Seems like it's in the Water over here! I think the women of Houston need to start the club Houston Hornytoads a reality! WOO!

But in all seriousness Kellie...Have you talked to your fiance about this and asked him what he thinks?? Some guys like to be creative or nasty if given the oppurtunity and know that sex is involved. :guess Just a thought. Might be worth a try to let him be the one with the control OR vice versa...turn the tables on him and be the dominating one and take control.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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    • KimBaxleyWilson

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