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Irritated with People-how to deal with it



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Hi Marcy-first of all congrats on your surgery and success so far. waytogo.gif After reading your first post, it really hit home. Since i have had the surgery I have lost 20-30lbs...but my surgery was in 2009. This is really discouraging in the first place because I should be extremely successful at this point but I fell off of the boat for a long time after my first successes. Everyone in my life is supportive but i do know what you mean. sometimes people that are not in this situation dont understand that their 'support' sometimes comes off as pressure. Everytime I talk to my mom she is like so how much have you lost? I finally told her that I didnt want to talk about it and i stopped weighing myself because at this time, i was feeling negative. she has been overweight as long as I have been alive so she understands the struggles of weighloss but I feel like she expected my band to be a miracle worker. She doesnt understand that sometimes I need mental support with it as well. after not losing for awhile, I had a follow up with one of my doctors and i lost 8lbs since the 6 months prior to seeing her and i was talking to my mom and she said wow...think of how much you wouldve lost if you just exercised...this is why this site is so nice because we can get the support we need from people that are going through the same things. I think we just need to push everyone else aside and think about number 1. Since i have started looking out for me and not caring what everyone thinks, is when I pushed harder and has lost 7lbs in the last week and a half. good luck with your journey. If you need help, support, or just a friend-contact me welldoneclap.gif

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Wow, I consider myself so lucky now that I've read these posts! All my family (that's all that knows about the surgery) does is say, "Wow, you look unbelievable!" I certainly can live with that. They never ask how much I've lost but sometimes I volunteer it when they are giving me compliments (I have 7 brothers and sisters and they are all naturally thin and beautiful, add to that a mom who looks like a movie star and it's kinds tough!!) The one person I've told on the outside (my secretary) does sometimes bother me by saying, "You look horrible in that, go buy some new clothes, they're much too baggy!" She's kind of funny about it at times but still supportive I guess.

I think in time, the comments and questions will decrease or go away and all you will get are the compliments. Hang in there! :rolleyes:

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Hi Marcy-first of all congrats on your surgery and success so far. waytogo.gif After reading your first post, it really hit home. Since i have had the surgery I have lost 20-30lbs...but my surgery was in 2009. This is really discouraging in the first place because I should be extremely successful at this point but I fell off of the boat for a long time after my first successes. Everyone in my life is supportive but i do know what you mean. sometimes people that are not in this situation dont understand that their 'support' sometimes comes off as pressure. Everytime I talk to my mom she is like so how much have you lost? I finally told her that I didnt want to talk about it and i stopped weighing myself because at this time, i was feeling negative. she has been overweight as long as I have been alive so she understands the struggles of weighloss but I feel like she expected my band to be a miracle worker. She doesnt understand that sometimes I need mental support with it as well. after not losing for awhile, I had a follow up with one of my doctors and i lost 8lbs since the 6 months prior to seeing her and i was talking to my mom and she said wow...think of how much you wouldve lost if you just exercised...this is why this site is so nice because we can get the support we need from people that are going through the same things. I think we just need to push everyone else aside and think about number 1. Since i have started looking out for me and not caring what everyone thinks, is when I pushed harder and has lost 7lbs in the last week and a half. good luck with your journey. If you need help, support, or just a friend-contact me welldoneclap.gif

Hang in there Carrie. I never thought I could actually lose weight and keep it off. But I feel real confident that I will. The 60 lbs I've lost so far gives me extra confidence. I have about 50 to go. So let's all do it together. Good Luck, I know you can do it.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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