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Fear, Who's afraid of not losing and or gaining it back



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Anyone else out there totally afraid they won't loose their weight. I had band surgery 12/2/10 and one 5 cc fill 12/29/10. I don't feel any restriction and I have to be so care full that I measure all my food so I won't eat too much. I have lost 42 pounds since I started the whole process in September and I have to give away most of my clothes because they are just falling off me. I am so afraid. Any suggestions for me. Thanks for the help!!

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Im not fearful of gaining back ...im fearful of not losing it all!!!

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congrats on your weight loss! that is fantastic (both of you). I was banded a few days ago - I know I will lose weight, but I am scared to be one of those 5 year stats where it is gained back :). Going to work with my psychologist to make sure I don't put myself back in that place! Best of luck.

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Of course that fear is always there, but I can't let it rule me or my thoughts. Just keep your eye on the prize and continue to move forward. So far it sounds like you are doing great. Keep up the good work and keep looking forward in a positive way.:)

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You have lost a nice amount of weight since Sept. I would say keep doing what your doing and you will continue to loose. My only advice would be to excersise if you haven't already.

I am at goal and have been maintaining since Sept. I fear gaining the weight back. I didn't "cheat" at all while I was loosing. Not once. However lately I have been eating some high fat, high carb food. I had one what I would consider a "binge". I have ordered chinese and been going out to eat. I continue to keep the right stuff in the house. I weigh in everyday and cut back if I hit 112 (I am very short-4'11"). I did pass up a free dessert at Olive Garden the other day. The waitress droped some of my food and the manager came over to apologize and offer the dessert. Without thinking much I said "no thanks, I don't do dessert". This board helps a lot and I hope to be able to make healthy choices most of the time and keep portions correct.

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i went into the surgery with a relatively low BMI and i've had to fight for every pound that i've lost. after almost 3 years i'm struggling with the last 7-10 pounds to get my BMI to "normal". i thought i'd have no problems with the surgery and the weight would just fall off without any problems. i was wrong. i was over-filled for too long and spent a lot of time throwing up as well as having some wicked acid reflux before i gave in and got a slight unfill. i'm scared to death that i'll gain the weight back. i've lost weight so many times in the past and gained it back so why should this time be any different, right? i'm hoping i'm in the right frame of mind now to be conscious of my food intake and to watch the scale VERY carefully!

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I agree, I am afraid of not loosing at all. I am loosing very slow with out a fill and cant wait until I get my first one. :o

quote name='Beachbunny' timestamp='1295004672' post='1560179']

Im not fearful of gaining back ...im fearful of not losing it all!!!

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Afraid of gaining it back! I lost it all but it took a long time. Most of my weight was gone and I was down to a normal BMI within 2 years, but it took another two to get to my real goal, one pound every now and then.

However, I've been unfilled for two months as I had to have a major surgery. Let me tell you, fear of unfilling my band caused me WAY more anxiety than having cancer did, and that's the truth. I'm not sure if I've got my priorities mixed but I always felt I'd recover from cancer, but getting fat again was a far more frightening prospect. However, so far, so good. I've actually lost quite a bit of weight through the effects of surgery and just being a bit TOO careful diet and exercise wise. I pushed myself to run 10 days after a bowel resection due to fear of what would happen if I didnt exercise for a few weeks. Thank god I was fit, strong and able to cope with that physical demand, becuase I really wasnt doing that with the blessing of my surgeon.

What I've come to realise is that I'm very proud of the work I put in to really change my lifestyle, and glad that I never had a tight band but always made myself do the right thing with the help of the band, rather than rely on the band to stop me eating with vomiting or discomfort. Obviously I need to eat more now to feel satisfied, but I broke the hold that sweet foods and junk food had over me and I've been easily able to fill that gap with fruit, vegies and wholegrains so that overall my calorie intake has not risen at all.

I'm slowly gaining confidence that I have mastery over this becuase I really would like to not fill my band again but a big part of me really wants that security of fill that means when I go out to eat, when there's a party or special occasion or just a particularly yummy meal, I have no choice, I cant overeat - because at the moment, I could. I fear that willpower will not hold out over time, but as my doctor said, if the weight starts to go on too much, she'll fill me again (she refuses at the moment becuase my BMI's only 19). The last few years has shown me that moderate fill in a band and regular exercise means you dont even have to think about maintaining, it just happens.

Take heart, you gain that confidence over time and dont feel so vulnerable.

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Scaredy cat here.

I was banded on 8/16/10 and my loss has been very slow. I expected to be down at least 50 lbs by now.

It seems that every lb. I lose is a fight. I told my sister today that it seems that I lost weight easier before I was banded.

I know in my heart though that I'm older now and I can do better with my exercise and the weekends are tough for me as far as eating on the straight and narrow.

So yes, I am afraid of not losing and if I do lose and get to my goal. I'm afraid I will gain it all back and more.

Dee

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Every single day will be a fight for all of us. We didnt get fat because we made great food choices, were couch potatoes and ate probably 3 to 4,000 calories a day. I stay under 1,000 no matter what. My weight loss has be at a stand still for 6 months but I have to say I am not gaining and that is fine. I have to find happiness in what I have done not the fact that it might come back. Sure its a possibility but we all never came this far to go back now did we. Good thoughts only.

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I'm afraid of how I am going to look when I lose it all. I believe it's going to come off but I have never been a normal size adult so I have no idea what the real me look like. I was 12 years old the last time I was under 200 and my goal is 199. I have a long way to go to get there and I am starting to get excited the closer I get to the 200's!

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I'm scared because this is the smallest I've been in as long as I can remember and I'm only 5 months out. Going farther is definitely uncharted territory... the unknown is always scary!!

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I was scared - and then I let my fear run me and sabotage my efforts and regained 50 pounds. I since have taken back control of ME so that my fear isn't driving the bus anymore, and have lost all I gained back plus some. Gaining back almost 50 pounds was actually a learning experience for me and while it sucked at the time, and it was annoying having to re-lose the weight, I'm thankful for the experience as I'm much stronger now. Im not always that confident (and am working hard in therapy to continue taking back control of my head) and I definitely falter from time to time (and sometimes MORE often than time to time), but I just have a different feeling inside of me that knows that my weight loss (and just as importantly, my fitness) goals are completely attainable and not that far off, actually. Beforehand, the thought that I could lose weight was completely unrealistic to me and I couldn't fathom being thin. Now I know that it will happen and I feel comfortable with it.

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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