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Does your brain ever catch up with your body?



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At what point do you not feel like you have to dress like your old fat self? Or look in the mirror and see your old body?

Halloween costume last night was MaryAnn from True Blood, so that required sleeveless. It took a LOT to get to suck it up and go without the jacket. Of course on the outside I showed confidence because it's what I do but on the inside I was thinking, these people are looking at my arms. They are wondering why the fat girl wondered why it was ok to wear sleeveless. What is she thinking?

I did have a NSV today though - one of my friends posted pics from the party and a young rather cute guy said "whos the raven haired hottie? I am married and SO not looking, but it totally was a big NSV!!

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Ya know, I have friends that weigh 120 pounds and still would worry about their arms!!! I don't know if it is a women thing or if Michele Obama screwed us? just kidding! I too am hoping I become more confident in myself. I was banded 9/23/10 and am the same height as you and just a year older. I lost very well in the beginning but have slowed to snail pace right now....my first fill is this Wednesday. I think this forum may help you become more assured that your thoughts are normal and you will get that confidence back you had at your "fighting" weight. It is a journey that's for sure. Hang in there! BTW I'm going as "GHOULS GONE WILD" tonight, censored sign included of course;)

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When I married 31 yrs ago I weighed 119lbs and would never wear a sleeveless top. For some reason, even though I have skinny little arms and not much flab at all, I just cannot bring myself to go without sleeves. I have many lady friends that feel as I do. I would rather bare my midriff at the age of 55 rather than show the upper arm.

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My brain has stayed pretty aligned with my body during this particular loss. I think exercise has tremendously helped me get in touch with this.

That said, I'm not blind. So my well-aligned brain can see my upper arms and say, "Um, no." (I have a consult with a plastic surgeon scheduled for when I'm at goal.)

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My brain still says "You look fat in that, put on a looser shirt" everytime I look in the mirror. I went from wearing a tight size 26 jeans to a size 14 jeans and still look at myself with the same disgust when I look in the mirror. I used to think that a size 14 wasnt that big. Now that I fit into it I think its huge. However I am smaller on the bottom than the top. I wear a 1x shirt with loose pants or a 2x shirt with tight jeans. I have PCOS so I hold most of my weight in my upper stomach. I have that inner tube look even when I'm naked. I always feel that people see me and think "her pants are way too tight, thats why she has that roll." but gods honest truth I have the same roll when i'm naked. I hate it and would love to have Lipo done on that one area. It would make sucha difference in my self esteem. oh well, you all know how much I hate my looks now. Maybe if I ever make it below 200lbs I will like my looks better. :wink2:

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My brain is struggling to catch up. My initial weight loss has been rather quick. I'm nearly three months out and down 80 pounds. I look in the mirror and I know i'm smaller but I still see the bigger girl!

My clothes are HUGE. I waited to go shopping and when I did was shocked my true size was now a 20 and not a 26/28.

On Sunday, I was buying a dress for my wedding anniversary dinner date. I found myself grabbing 24's from the racks because it was almost like I didn't believe myself in size 20 clothing. I thought it had to be a fluke those other size 20 items fit me. I stood in the store contemplating which sizes to grab, I was so afraid to grab the smaller ones and what if they didn't fit! It's such a strange feeling. I tried on those 24's and I was floating in them. The 20 ended up working out just fine. I had a long talk with my nutritionist about this. She said take lots of pictures, it's definately helped me visualize that it's actually happening!

I remain hopeful that my brain will somewhat catch up with my body eventually, until then..........i'm keeping that digital camera stocked with batteries!

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I think that pictures are a GREAT way to help "see" the new you. I have taken undies/bra pics every three months since the beginning. When I feel down, or feel like I cannot see the difference, I pull those suckers up on the computer. Talk about reality check! I know it will take a very.long.time. for all of us to see ourselves the way we are NOW. I spent 14 years heavy and am only recently a "normal" weight. Treat yourself well and with respect for all you are accomplishing!!

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The pictures discussion really has me excited to go do that at home...take all the old pictures I took front and sideways to mark "the start of the new diet" and with my current ones and see how they compare.

For some reason I just can't get enough. I don't know if its because I amazed of my changing looks or if its because it's all new (I have been heavy all my life).

Guys are starting to notice me, which is weird all in itself.

I guess this is why people go to therapy. Its probably a good idea....

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I've found it hard coming to terms with the fact that normal weight doesnt equal perfect body. I still have my hang ups. I thought that I'd done well to get to about 68kg (BMI 22 or so) but that dropping 6km more would make me perfect.

Well, for various reasons I have dropped that six kgs and now have a BMI of 20. I am wonderfully thin, I can wear anything and am down to a US size 6. But Ilook like an 80 year old in the nude! I dont have an apron belly, my stomach is flat but its all loose, with this hard body underneath it, my boobs are just hanging empty skin and I've even noticed wrinkling on my inner elbows.

My back is great, lol, you can see every muscle, its a work of art.

My bum still sags, my inner thighs are loose, sigh.

I think personally that how your body actually looks and how you perceive it are not particularly related. If you cant love yourself and accept yourself fat, you're not going to be able to thin. I still feel big and fat on occasion and to be honest, at the moment, i know logically that I'm bloody skinny.

Its something to work on, for sure. I've been at goal weight or under for over 3 years and its not helping my head much.

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I need my body to catch up with my brain. lol

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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