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I have a very real concern here. I've been reading how important it is to have a good "team" and support system. I don't like my Dr.'s dietitian that is on staff. I've met with him twice and both times I came out of the meeting frustrated, crying and feeling very bad about myself. It was like talking to a wall. Both conversations were one-sided. He did not acknowledge my crying or ask what was causing it. I have a meeting w/the Dr. on Wed. and I don't really know what to say. I like my Dr. very much. But, right now I'm seeing the dietitian more than the Dr. During this entire processes of getting the band and having it, how much time will I be spending w/the dietitian? I'm wondering if I need to change Dr's.

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What is he saying to make you cry?

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I only met with the dietician once per insurance requirements. If your docor's program requires more visits and you decide to stick with this surgeon you might be locked in to this dietician but I'd discuss it with the doctor or his program director. Tell them you have these issues and would like to either cut down on your contact with this person or use an independent dietician. Staff members come and go at these practices and if he is acting this way toward you he is probably as unsympathetic and upsetting to others. At the least they will talk to him about his attitude; at best you might find a more helpful person has been hired. After your surgery you can decide whether to see him any more or not. I go to the office only for fills, although they offer support meetings etc. I am not locked in to a post-op program.

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Wow my doctor only required me to have a 30 minute consult with his dietician yet she sat with my husband and I for an hour to make sure we understood everything and didnt have any more questions. She was wonderful and gave me her number if I ever wanted to talk.

If you like this surgeon I wouldnt change but I would sure talk to him about it. If you are feeling uncomfortable then more than likely others are too. The team doesnt know that there is a problem with a member if its not reported.

Good Luck to you,

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I have not seen a dietitian before or after surgery. If you feel you need one and don't like theirs you can hire one on your own.

Remember, when you are dealing with a bully the best defense is a good offense. Snap on him and he will act better.

EX: I do not appreciate your ________ (fill in the blank with the appropriate choice, tone, attitude, etc.) I am paying your salary and I expect to be treated with respect. If you are not capable of that I will have to replace you. ((Square up your shoulders, straighten your back and STARE at him with a frown :thumbup: and do not speak or look away until he reacts, he will back down, I promise.))

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btrieger-It's not what he said as much as what was not said. It was like talking to a brick wall. There was no understanding, compassion, or empathy. I'm not 100 pounds over weight for the past 12 years because I'm doing everything right. We went over a food plan (basically Weight Watchers) and he made a list of 21 things I needed to change, including exercising. I told him I had my 3 month WW journal in my purse where I did the program w/exercise and lost less than 5 pounds. He just stared at me...and then went on w/his talk. So, on my second visit (4 weeks later) I brought my food/exercise journal for a review. I'd lost no weight. So, we spent 45 minutes going over my journal and him pointing out all the different mistakes I made. I was so frustrated by the end of the 45 minutes I got angry. I told him it is hard to do an "about-face" and do his 21 point list w/exercise perfectly from day one. He said he did not have time to "go over" or talk about the good changes that I did make. OK, point taken. I guess my crying was out of frustration.

I'm going to journal for a while and get my feelings out so I'm not an emotion ball of energy when I see my Dr. But, I am going to at least stand up and speak for myself. The "old" me would not have even done that much.

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I ws a little skeptical at first thinking you may be too sensitive but it sounds like his people skills are lacking. If he is only going to point out and expand on the negative and ignore the positive; he isn't worth your time.

You're going to have to deal with a nutritionist after surgery as well and if he is that much of a jerk you may fore go appointments and that is detrimental.

I would talk to your surgeon and ask if you can find your own nutritionist.

And remember, you are the customer and they are just a single service provider. There are thousands of bariatric surgeons in Texas.

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I only had to go to the dietitian once in the beginning of the process which was a year ago. (Long time to satisfy insurance)

I wish I could visit with one again now that my date is set for July 28. I am going to the support group next week. My Dr. just said to follow what BariatricEating.com . recommends.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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