SleeverSk

Hi, I feel the same and am left wondering how i am going to live my life now. I have reacted so badly to this surgery that i can bearly eat. I would gladly take back the 20kg i have lost to have my stomach back in tact. I dont know how to move past these feelings its awful. I too had been thinking about it since 2016. I think those of us who think about it for a long time arent ready to actually do it. People who make the decision and do it quickly seem to adjust better. I am now 3 months out and everyone kept saying it will get better you wont feel like this for long but i still am 😢. I want to feel better, I want to be happy but i dont know how

Hi rjan, thank you for your kind response . I have read it a couple of times now when feeling down. I really appreciate your kind words and encouragement ❤

Food can still entertain, just not in the quantities you consumed beforehand. I've been reading so many posts with the theme of missing food....I have to admit it goes through my mind sometimes too. A change that I've recently made is to not be distracted by TV, phone, computer etc, and with every single mouthful think about the nutrition, texture, taste. I feel like I'm eating a lot more mindfully, and starting to really enjoy a (small) meal.
I've started growing herbs from seeds. Strange I know, but I work from home in a very isolated place that we have just moved to. No close friends nearby, and sadly had to have our dogs put to sleep last weekend. I have no company at all during the day, and just the family at night. The delivery man must think I'm nuts, I chatter away non stop to him! My point is, I am inside all day at my desk, so taking an interest in growing herbs and shortly a full vege garden gets me outside and doing something that keeps me active and my mind busy.
This site is a great place to get advice and just chat to people. Good luck on your journey, it will get easier every day.

I haven't gotten as far with my weight loss, I'm on week 3. However I was thinking something similar about what my life will be like without food for entertainment and bonding with others... Like what is enjoyable in my world outside of food and how to keep my activities fun and consistent.(outside of fast food)[emoji30] thanks for sharing your thoughts, I definitely feel less alone!

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What exactly are you regretting ? For me i regret having the surgery at all, i am finding it very hard to cope with the changes to eating and drinking, my reflux now takes twice the amount of meds to control and if i dont eat ever 3 hours which half the time i dont feel like doing i feel sick. I never know what to eat as i have never been a "diet " type of person so I am struggling quite badly i wish i never had the surgery in the first place.

Hi, I feel the same and am left wondering how i am going to live my life now. I have reacted so badly to this surgery that i can bearly eat. I would gladly take back the 20kg i have lost to have my stomach back in tact. I dont know how to move past these feelings its awful. I too had been thinking about it since 2016. I think those of us who think about it for a long time arent ready to actually do it. People who make the decision and do it quickly seem to adjust better. I am now 3 months out and everyone kept saying it will get better you wont feel like this for long but i still am 😢. I want to feel better, I want to be happy but i dont know how

The tags above is what is happening.

I never feel right.

Hi Friends!
I rarely ever get on this anymore, but I know how pivotal these forums were to me at the beginning of my journey to have people alongside me going through similar experiences! I did this around this time last year and figured another post wouldn't hurt anyone. So, the facts! I'm currently 3.5 years out from VSG, down 140 pounds and kept off, and still living my best life! I have had two plastic surgeries, completed two degrees, and have never been happier in my life. For those just beginning, please do not get discouraged. I remember so vividly the nights I would cry with regret that I had made such a mistake, that my life was ruined, that I was upset I couldn't just do it the "normal" way. These are such valid feelings, but with time they fade. I still have my moments, even this far out, where I have thoughts of "I wonder.." but they are quickly shut down when I think of the quality of life I have provided for myself by going on this journey and seeing photos of myself from 4-5 years ago. So stay strong, stay dedicated, count those grams of Protein and ounces of water!! You have silent supporters in your corner! Always happy to answer questions or provide words of encouragement! Sending best wishes and hugs to all those who need it!

This is such an interesting observation. I have never regretted it since the day after the surgery. I learned about it in Jan. 2020 and had my surgery in March 2020. For me, it was the fact that my metabolic symptoms were getting worse, and I was nearly the age when my dad got diabetes, and he seems pretty miserable now. Maybe you are right. The people who think about it longer may still be less sure about their decision, even after they've made it.

Nevertheless, I do want to tell the OP and the other posters who are feeling regrets - for me, the painful/uncomfortable physical effects and some of the negative emotions (like feeling left out and feeling like a failure that you had to do this) were still very strong over the first ~9 months - but they are much better now. I don't feel pain when I swallow even Water too fast; I rarely feel faint and need to lie down after meals. Also - at first you have rapidly changing hormone levels from fat-soluble hormones being released as you lose weight, and this WILL affect your emotions. In a year or too, you will likely start to feel better physically - much better than you do now, but also better than your old body did to at a year or two out.
I'm 1.5 years out, and generally very happy with my decision, but I am still getting used to my own body and my new life. I still sometimes feel partly like an alien in a new world. That is a rough process. It takes time.

Emotionally, it's normal to mourn when you undergo a major life change. The old you IS dead. There is no going back. Change is always hard, and that causes anxiety because you don't know yet how it will turn out. And while you hope that the future you will be healthier than the old you, of course you're also having trouble envisioning how happy that future will be. Certainly some of the pleasures the old you enjoyed have been lessened. Of course you'd rather be fat and happy, than slim and miserable! I would too.

Let yourself mourn that. Sadness is a real, natural, normal feeling. Feel it.

But don't forget to put some effort into the new you also. Right now you're taking a LOT less pleasure in food. But don't let yourself just wallow in depression forever. (Unless you can't help it - then seek outside help.) Think about having some new experiences and finding new pleasures. Or, perhaps think about if maybe there's something really painful in your life that you've been using food to avoid - perhaps there is a better way to solve that problem. Then, later, when most likely some of that pleasure in food returns, you'll be in a better place.

I actually take much more pleasure in food now because I don't feel guilty and out of control around it, and the new changes in behavior have finally become habit. I can just focus on actually enjoying the flavor of food, not to mention the satisfying journey between anticipation and completion, hunger and fullness. I was always so hungry before - I never felt 'full' - I always just felt 'uncomfortable'.

Also, there will be people who actually do feel worse in the long term. If that happens to you, seek out a therapist, or a particularly good friend, whatever you need to be able to talk about it. Feel free to send me a message if you need to talk. I may not regret this particular decision, but have certainly been other changes in my life that were irreversibly negative.

Hi, I feel the same and am left wondering how i am going to live my life now. I have reacted so badly to this surgery that i can bearly eat. I would gladly take back the 20kg i have lost to have my stomach back in tact. I dont know how to move past these feelings its awful. I too had been thinking about it since 2016. I think those of us who think about it for a long time arent ready to actually do it. People who make the decision and do it quickly seem to adjust better. I am now 3 months out and everyone kept saying it will get better you wont feel like this for long but i still am 😢. I want to feel better, I want to be happy but i dont know how

I hate it, i had second thoughts going into surgery and was treated like i was having pre op nerves. I woke up hoping for some reason the surgery hadnt been done and i spiralled from there to the point of being suicidal. I have been beating myself up over why on earth did i think this was a good idea, why didnt my gp explain how serious the surgery was and why wasnt i given other options, why did the surgeon say " the effects of the sleeve only last 18 months then its up to you" my mind heard in 18 months you will be back to eating and drinking normally, why didnt my dietian say you are not ready for this when answering her questions, why didnt she explain in full detail how eating and drinking would change forever. I spent 8 weeks on my sisters couch curled up in the foetal position bearly eating, having anxiety and panic attacks. I am getting better though i am back at work, i cry at least once a day over what i have done to myself and its hard to incredibly hard. I find no joy or pleasure in food any more its a chore to eat and drink. So i guess i am dealing with lots of problems i wish i hadnt had the surgery as i would much prefer to be fat and happy than slim and miserable 😢😢

I understand the not being interested in eating as I was the same. Wasn’t hungry either but I knew I had to eat to get nutrients into my body. I’d decided I wouldn’t rely on supplements & shakes but get everything I needed from what I ate. I ate scrambled eggs or rolled oats from when I was allowed - purée & soft foods stages - & tossed the shakes. You probably do need to start adding some solid ‘real’ foods into your diet especially if you’re weak & shaky . Try some thick vegetable & meat Soups then some slow cooked stews & braises (perfect with your weather cooling now). You won’t eat much but you have to get your tummy used to digesting solid food again.

Oh Viking, you are my hero! Well done!!

My clinic has not had a dietitian/nutritionist on staff for months now (part of the Great Resignation, I guess). So they've been contracting with people, and I finally had had enough of it.
She asked what I have been eating. I track religiously, down to the teaspoon of mustard (which probably isn't necessary, but...). So I told her. It came to about 850 calories. She absolutely lost her mind, whipped out a booklet, and told me I'm to be eating no more than 1/3 cup of food five times a day. I pointed out that I run or work out literally every day, that I am going back to a pretty physical outdoor job, that I'm losing weight steadily, and that eating this amount gives me the energy I need.
I asked how I was supposed to get the Protein goal the surgeon gave me (80-100 g a day) on that little food, and she told me to stop being difficult, that I was obviously going to just gain it all back (lol, on 850 cal a day, lol lol lol), that too much sodium would spike my blood pressure and heart rate (lol, it was 114/74 during intake with a resting heart rate of 54), etc., etc.
So I fired her. At the top of my lungs. Which meant that a bunch of other people came running and there was kind of a scene.
I don't care. I asked a friend who's had VSG who she uses for a NUT and she recommended her folks, so I signed up there and will be given macros to meet by someone who has experience with athletes who've undergone bariatric surgery. I'm not going to be wedged into a one-size-fits-all kind of thing because she's reading from some Nth-generation copy of some manual.

I'm definitely not eating anything too fast, lol...it wasn't a feeling in my throat it was a feeling in my stomache towards the left side which once I talked to my dietician said it sounded like nerves. I did try a Greek yogurt cup yesterday like she recommended...took me about an hour to eat it all but no problems. I guess I just need to get mentally comfortable with eating again

I'm 15 days post-op and feel the same. I'm doing purees but I'm scared to eat anything beyond my homemade oil-free hummus. Everyone keeps saying "ricotta bake", but I can't eat that because I'm lactose intolerant and I refuse to use fake cheese products or take a pill just to eat something my body says I shouldn't eat anyway. I did try a spinach artichoke puree that I made which was delicious but so hard to digest that I'm scared to try it again. I honestly think we just have to tip-toe our way through these first few weeks/months until we figure out what works for us and what doesn't. I think it's better to be cautious, anyway.

AjaSlimtone I totally agree. It may take us longer to get comfortable than most which isn't a bad thing. Better safe than sorry. When I read some post I'm amazed how some are eating already like they never had surgery which would scare me to death...no way would I be testing the waters so fast to try and eat regularly. I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who feels this way.

I'm one month out. I'm not someone who can follow a "meal plan". I don't want to decide at the beginning of the day what I'll be eating at each meal; I need to have a choice or life feels deadly dull. That being said, I will cook something a few times a week (right now it's some sort of ground meat or bean-based dish with a spicy sauce eaten with fat free greek yogurt) and then alternate among the ones I've cooked. I portion them out into 5-6 or more servings in small plastic containers and freeze some so I don't get sick of what I've made or it doesn't go bad too soon. I'll eat them three times a day, Breakfast lunch and dinner, except I will occasionally make egg product with cheese for breakfast. I would say at most I spent about 40 minutes a day on all three meals, and many days it's less than 10 minutes.
Of course, I live alone and don't have to feed anyone else. I do spend some time looking at recipes, but I'll usually do this when as a form of inspiration, mostly it's things I can't have. Most people's ideas of what a post-surgery patient can have seems very bland to me and I wouldn't eat it, so I don't look at bariatric meal ideas - I go to real cooking sites and figure out how to adapt "normal" recipes.
My job involves a lot of traveling so my next task will be to figure out how to eat better on the road.

"buyers remorse" is very common the first month or so after surgery. I had it as well. But for almost all of us, it goes away and we're really happy with our choice to have surgery. So just hang in there.

I'm a Premier Protein hater, too. I used mostly Syntrax and Unjury products (Syntrax only comes in powder - Unjury now has ready-to-drink, but they didn't back when I had surgery). People's tastes are all really different - just experiment and see if you can find a couple you like.
I was a presenter for my clinic's pre-op classes for about three years (until COVID struck). EVERY class someone would ask about Hair loss. I could count on it. That and loose skin seem to be people's major concerns. And they were mine as well when I was a pre-op and early post-op. But I think I can speak on behalf of most vets here that we would take either or both of those any day of the week over being morbidly obese again. The hair loss is a minor inconvenience that may or may not happen to you. Not everyone loses hair. I lost hair between months 5-9, but the only reason I knew about it was I noticed about twice the normal number of hair strands in my comb after coming out my just-shampooed hair. Looking in the mirror, I couldn't tell. Even if your loss is more significant than mine, for most people (not all - but most), they're the only ones who notice it.

@cellbell thank you so much! I am on the hunt for Fairlife. My brain knows all of the facts you shared, but my little soul hasn't comprehended yet. I will get there.

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I finally showed my before and after photos on Facebook. I was very, very scared. I had told a lot of people - but some didn't know. I had never EVER showed a full body picture like that. From the side at that! Anyways, on the left: I was a miserable 369lbs. SUPER unhealthy, probably headed to death. I doubt very seriously I could make it past 400. My body would probably just give out. I was already struggling to breathe doing simple tasks/walking up stairs. ANYWHO, the right was a shot taken by my beautiful momsicle on Mother's Day just last weekend. Ignore my "suns in the eyes" face. I am over 120lbs lost from February 27th, 2020 to now. I finally am under 250lbs and I am just floored. Of course, I won't lie. It's been a struggle.
Currently, my biggest challenge has and still is - dumping. In the beginning, for the first 8 months, I threw up every. single. day. I realized ice cream, fried foods, steak - out of the question. Buffets were a waste. Most every meal I got out, was a waste. It made people feel bad at first because I would stop eating after 3 bites. I had to constantly remind people that I didn't mind if they ate! I got accepted into nursing school and reverted back to some old habits. Sugary coffees (which made me dump like HELL), chicken nuggets, fries...Anything I could stuff in my mouth "on the go". I would pay the price, but I wasn't puking after every single meal. So I thought I was in the clear. Earlier this year, I started to have tremendous abdominal pain. Spasms that took my breath away. After numerous tests, it was concluded that I had severe IBS with Constipation and diarrhea. After talking to my NP at the weight loss place, we decided to try more plant-based alternatives. I'll admit, I was skeptical and very upset because this girl LOVES a nice juicy steak! But, I have noticed my symptoms are near non-existence when I eat Beans, (wild) rice, whole grains, some fruits, and almost any veggie. I take it light with caffeine as that is a trigger, but I do still consume some.
Suffice to say, this has been the hardest battle I have ever fought in my entire life. I continue to fight it. I continue to struggle with choices about food. I've learned to not limit myself completely. If I want a cookie, I'll eat half. I don't starve myself. I just don't overindulge like I used to. It seems to be working as I have lost a ton of weight. I plateau, but it's going. I just want to be an advocate for anyone considering the surgery and will answer ANY questions! I want to also be your cheerleader if you have already had the surgery. I can't promise it won't be hard, but I will promise it will be worth it to look at yourself in the mirror and have self-esteem again! I am actually OK with people taking full body pictures now! Insane! I am waiting for my weight to be stable to get skin surgery, but baby steps!
#AMA

I had my surgery on a Monday. I went home on Wednesday. On Friday I had to go to the ER for throwing up blood. A LOT of blood. I had aspiration pneumonia and I had to have another surgery to repair a bleeding ulcer by my esophagus the next morning.
I'm 11 months out. I've lost 128 lbs total, but it should be more. I'm the one not to follow. I eat what I want because I don't crave foods any more. I, literally, have a tough time trying to find something to eat. If I get a chicken sandwich out, I eat it without the bun. I've wasted so much money on food, it isn't funny. I might eat 10 different kinds of food and nothing good. I've never eaten fruit and the few vegetables I do eat aren't great for you. But I do eat smaller portions. I'm still losing, so I can't complain. But I bet my dietician will at my next visit! He was so rude on my last visit! He was horrified that I had a piece of pizza. Umm, I didn't say I ate it all at once! I'm demanding to see the other one. My doctor/surgeon, personally, said I could eat what I want, just in small portions. There are times I do throw up a small bit and that's because I don't wait a half hour after eating to drink. I get so dehydrated and I've always drank a huge amount with my meals. Hardest part of this journey ever!

Yeah, I'm admittedly a "lazy loser" myself. I've never been ANY good at counting/tracking calories, points, whatever. I eat things I enjoy because I know that one of my mental shortcomings is that if I try to force myself to eat things I don't enjoy just because they're healthy, I know I will cheat. I will *have* to eat something enjoyable, regardless of what other "healthy" things I've eaten... so rather than compound the calorie intake, I'll just cut to the chase and eat what I enjoy, healthy or not, but in moderation and smaller portions.
Not everyone's brain works the same way, and I know this perspective is likely anathema for others, but it's working thus far for me.
1 year out from surgery date my weight has plateaued as expected, but knowing my propensity to enjoy food, I'm deliberately keeping a closer eye on the scale. I have my fast food and my occasional sweets, but If I see any long-term trend upwards more than about 2-3 pounds, I immediately tighten things up.
So far, so good. Just this morning I hit a new low weight, so the the trend is still downward, and IMO that's what's important, no matter the methods employed.
Different strokes, yadda yadda yadda...

Being that I am addicted to Coca Cola...idk how I am going to shake the habit..but its the reason y I am overweight..

2 weeks post op gastric sleeve. When does it get easier? I’m having trouble getting even half my Water in. Part of me wonders what the hell did I do. I have no hunger at all, to the point where I have to focus my priority to take in a shake and last 2 days I can only do half a shake at a time. And the throwing up heaving seems to be more snd more often. My first post op in on Wednesday but I’m wondering if anyone else has gone through this and when I should expect to be better. I feel like my relationship with food has worsened to being afraid to eat or drink anything . Kinda low right now. Weights coming off, but now I wonder at what cost.