OKCPirate

@@mrsNilla - "men can't read hints" PREACH IT. Learn it, live it, love it. Truth. We are not mind readers and if you are faking, you will forever get the stuff we were doing when you faked it. Just saying. All that said, the men who love you want to know what you want, I know you want to be desired and feel that if he "really loved you he would know" but he probably really does love you, but he doesn't know what he doesn't know. OK, end of that rant (for now).

Here is a link to the online file, you can download it and insure it's virus free: https://www.mediafire.com/folder/wt0ib922m75c9/Tammy

@@Brenda Sherwood - check with homeland security. They can give you real info since they deal with that all the time. One of the dumber things I did was crossing over the border for dinner one time, and I realized I had brought cash, but left my wallet in my hotel room in the US. So I am walking back over hoping they will let me back in, I explained what an idiot I was to the border guy, and he asked where you born "Shaw AFB, in Sumpter County SC." He looked at me and said, "well you can't make that one up, hop on over." Glad I didn't say Cleveland, or NY.

@theantichickh yep. Well said I try to be open but I still get embarrassed occasionally. The old APE (American Puritan Ethic) rears its ugly head in my thoughts and I'll turn beat red

Well thanks for having the guts to ask the question. I'm glad there is a place to ask it, and I think you got some quality responses. Just remind your guy, lots of lube, take your time, or you will only do it once. BTW, my favorite Bob and Tom Show moment on this subject is here: http://www.mediafire.com/file/3bn868d1j311bvm/Tammy_Thanksgiving.mp3 If that link doesn't work, there is a download here: https://www.mediafire.com/folder/wt0ib922m75c9/Tammy

Are you irritated because his requests to offer help require you to think? My SO seems to appreciate me just doing things rather than asking. For instance, taking care of the dinner arrangements so she can really relax. (That does NOT mean I don't want her input). If this sounds like your source of irritation, coach the boy up. If my girlfriend hadn't told me how great it was for me to plan out dates for her I would have never known. Just a suggestion though you might just be venting and if so, never mind;-/

IBM OR IRS?? Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App Wells Fargo account manager is also scary right now

I used a Mr. coffee cup warmer to put my plate on to keep things warm. Also, pick a meal to practice slow eating (I did lunch). Shot glasses made great sipping cups for Water. Start trying Protein shakes. Stop by GNC and try Isopure clear. If you can stomach it, it is great for protien and hydration the first two weeks, but not to everyone's taste.

Chew well. If you eat fast, it will result in a horrible retching. At least that was my result.

@viri87@Asmundson69 Congrats to both of you. Enjoy the new freedom that comes with being lighter. Pick up a 30pound weight and realize you had been carrying that 24/7. I hope you will slowly ramp up the exercise. Think about taking colder showers, and look into everything you can to make your skin as healthy and happy as possible. Look into yoga. That helped me sculpt the best bod I could get. Enjoy the process, realize as the fat goes away, a huge number of hormones dump into your blood stream, it might get a little freaky, but it will pass.

I think women crossing their legs with panties flying off is sexy too. Just saying.

Change your focus. Don't think of it as "win/I got the job, lose/I didn't" Think of it as "my goal is to help this person doing the hiring to make a decision." When you realize that with that as a goal, you can't lose, the pressure comes off you. You don't think of yourself as a self conscious piece of meat, but as a fellow human being. The new confidence will ooze out. BTW, I know this works because I applied it to my time doing fundraising. I initially went into it thinking, "if they don't give, they are rejecting me." And that was NOT true. They just didn't like the offer or the program, or they couldn't give right now. Once I went in with the "I want them to make a decision" mindset, bam, everything changed for the good. I couldn't lose. I was confident and happy.

I miss college sometimes. Back in the '80's downtown Greenville NC was the place to be for Halloween and East Carolina University knew how to Celebrate the day. I have learned this has changed over the last few years, but in the day, it was fun. My senior year I was working at a convenience store until 11, as soon as my shift ended I put a shooting target over my work shirt, with a bunch of fake blood, with the tag line, "great shooting Tex..." (little ghalos irony since two other clerks were just robbed). But the ladies could get wonderfully dressed up for that day. Sigh...oh for a night of my old 21 year old body and 53 years of experience.

It was an odd mix. I have several business partners I had to explain it to, and they were understanding, with a couple of exceptions. Until they realized that the one "negative case" they thought they knew about turned out to be a positive example of someone completely changing their life for the good. My kids were great, my mom found out and was completely nervous until I promised to fly her out, and she was very helpful. A retired RN from San Diego who speaks survival Spanish...she actually came to really like the facility. It was like what she loved about nursing before she retired. Uncluttered rooms, lots of time with the patients, no insurance forms. So eventually, everyone was won over.

I shoot for an average of 100g of Protein a day. But some days it just doesn't happen. But it is my eating priority.

Stevia, great stuff. It was hard getting off of artificial sweeteners in diet sodas. Over time you will find you will enjoy non carbonated beverages.

Or drugs like Welburtin, get it checked out.

Yes we do (bite me anyone who is offended, it is what is, you ladies get multiple orgasms, and that ticks me off, so unfair). Umm, is this a problem for some ladies? If it is, talk and educate you man. Message me and I'd be glad to send you links. It is outside the scope of this post, but there is no reason not to take advantage of all the biological potential you ladies have. And have fun (in a safe and sane way). Education is really erotic when well applied. Sex isn't something you do, it is a place of transcendent union. It can be pure bliss, the joy of anticipation, and hours of pleasure...but only when respected and explore. Respect eros, and embrace it.

Well that sucks. BTW, I am example that this cycle can end. The end began to end in my late 40's (year post divorce) and WLS at 51 ended the struggle. I don't think sex is the beat all and end all of intimacy. It isn't, trust me on that. But it is an important part of our humanity. No reason to give up this ONE part of your self. The pain in your post makes me think there is more healing to be done than just WLS. Fix that first. Just saying, suggesting hoping you will et. al.

These were recommended by the people who do my blood work. I include them in Breakfast and in my yogurt. Best to soak them first...https://draxe.com/chia-seeds-benefits-side-effects/. Can't say they have changed my life, but the evidence suggest there are positives.

Yes we do (bite me anyone who is offended, it is what is, you ladies get multiple orgasms, and that ticks me off, so unfair). Don't expect to see anything really substantial until month two. But that's when I went by a mirror at the mall, and flat out didn't recognize myself. That was a surreal moment.

It's not an easy journey, you have serious work to do changing your internal self image to your external. Many women find that they are offended because they are getting attention because of their external appearance and that offends them because internally they feel the same, which reinforces an idea that "guys just care about looks." That's about as true as "women only care about how much you make." Finding the right person for you is damn difficult. It's just a reality. But I tripled the number of prospective Mrs. Pirates by quitting smoking and met even more when I lost weight. I KNOW it is much different when you are a woman an being "pursued" but it still sucks being a scorned guy so take some solace in that.

i'm verklempt talk amongst yourselves... I'll give you a topic..."WLS is not the easy way out, discuss".

Why be sore, when you can soar?

Enjoy the transformation. I think I was about two months into the transformation, when I startled myself. I walked by the mirror and wondered "who the hell is that?" It will happen.