supbanana

My pic was taken on my 63rd birthday. No way I can ever look 21 again.

Somehow this surgery taught me that I really no longer want to be alone romantically - I want to be in a committed relationship. But I wanted to wait until I lost weight. So I joined a website this summer, and dated someone through the summer. The relationship didn't work out, but it did give me confidence. I'm a little slow about these things, but I will try again.

I think there's a huge connection between weight gain/failure to lose for some of us.
I could justify my lack of interest from my ex because of my weight and pretend things were otherwise ok - they weren't.
Once we separated, my weight kept me from looking for a new relationship or even casual dating. It was a physical barrier and I think I subconsciously didn't want to lose it. It kept the world away from me.
When I started to feel better about me, I didn't want to be ill (I had 2 comorbidities including diabetes) or fat any more. I didn't want to be hidden.
So, while starting dating frightens me, it's also exciting. It's not just that I am ready to meet someone new, it also signals that I feel good about me, no need to hide :-)

Dating terrifies me! I mean seriously...I tried computer dating for awhile and panicked anytime a man PM'd me or tried to chat. I've had therapists in the past who saw me for chronic pain and PTSD issues and they always came around to the "Why aren't you dating?" thing...which I refused to speak of as a problem. Makes me kinda sad. (especially since I write romance novels!! LOL!) In fact, I sometimes wonder if the weight gain was a defense mechanism.

I was 120 lbs overweight and joined a dating site on my phone. My BFF had had luck at dates, some bf's but they wouldn't last, so I decided yo give it a try. Went on the first lunch date,..... I was interested but he wasn't so ok pass. Second date only wanted a bitty call PASS! Third date, I decided I would try phone conversations first. Those went very well and were on a daily basis. We had our first date and it took us an hour to order food bc we were talking the whole time! That date was a success! I delete the app a week later. We've been together for two years now and planned to get married! I am 7 month pis top and am living with the man of my dreams. People are surprised at how we met but we fit together perfectly!

Yeah, shapers do a great job of smoothing bumps (saddle bags, in my case) but they do distort my shape. I'm more wide with flat abdomen, and when I put on a shaper, I become more round. It squishes all the loose skin and hanging fat into places it doesn't usually belong. Depending on what clothes I put on over it, it might look better or worse. I've found that a pair of control panty hose does the job for me most of the time without being wildly uncomfortable.

I'll second Dr. Illan. I posted my entire experience here on VST if you want to check it out but overall, I absolutely wouldn't change a thing about my surgery. He is amazing. Good luck with your choice! I would recommend Dr. Illan to anybody.

I'll second Dr. Illan. I posted my entire experience here on VST if you want to check it out but overall, I absolutely wouldn't change a thing about my surgery. He is amazing. Good luck with your choice! I would recommend Dr. Illan to anybody.

Ha, I have kind of an 'all in one' deal. My grandma likes to tell me, "wow honey, you sure can tell you lost weight!" Which is great, but reminds me of how she used to say, "gosh honey, you sure can tell you gained weight!"
My favorite compliments though? Apparently surgery increased my confidence or something because people keep commenting on my excellent posture, how regal I look, how I walk with 'poise', etc. I love it.

Seriously, just be direct and honest. "Thank you, but I'm not interested."

Seriously, just be direct and honest. "Thank you, but I'm not interested."

I'll second Dr. Illan. I posted my entire experience here on VST if you want to check it out but overall, I absolutely wouldn't change a thing about my surgery. He is amazing. Good luck with your choice! I would recommend Dr. Illan to anybody.

It's illan.
Definitely hop on Facebook and join our group, 'Team Illan'! There's not a lot of info out there on him but we're very active on that group and love answering questions. I was sleeved by Dr. Illan 8/9 and it was an absolutely amazing experience, I would (and have!) recommend him to anyone.

The third G's a charm! Agreed, just be honest & tell him that you are dating someone else... It was very early in your relationship, so he shouldn't be too hurt anyway. After a little bit, he will probably appreciate your honesty... He sure was honest about his feelings towards you! Maybe phrase it like that... "You were honest with me about our lack of chemistry... So I feel like I need to be just as clear with you. I am dating someone else, and I wish you the best." Good luck!

Texting to ask for a date is sort of the weenie's way out, as far as I'm concerned. Unless he has never been the type to call, I would probably let it go. My guess is he will get the message with no reply & maybe he was afraid of the possibility of rejection is why he choose to text.
If he turns into a pest with the texting, then by all means text him back that while you enjoyed his company you don't wish to pursue anything further. I don't know if I'd mention the new guy. It may open up hope that if things fall through with G3 then he still has a shot.

Men usually do a lot better than women when it comes to high Protein and low carb diet but each person has a different journey. I don't think it's the Dr. technique but the person's will power to conquer obesity with this tool. I would suggest getting in touch with Omar or Susan and doing a Skype with Dr. Illan. Also Omar had the surgery in April 2013 and as you may know was at goal in 5 months and he looks awesome!!!!

Oh, love. With respect, sounds like your 80hr work week is taking its toll... Is there anything you've identified you like to eat that has 'reasonably' 'good' nutritional value, is quick to obtain and reasonably easy to eat?
Unless your nutritionist is sat on your shoulder and given the fact that you sound a bit burnt out, I'd be eating anything you can that fits into your lifestyle and doesn't make you feel completely despondent. Hell, how is your nutritionist going to know anyhow? As long as your bloods come back right and your weight moves in the right direction. I'd be getting 'creative' on your food diary!
If the surgery wasn't your idea, I don't quite understand how this surgery could be 'forced' on you - as it would infringe your human rights and would actually constitute a criminal offence! (Which I'm sure you think is accurate!) But that aside, if it was prescribed for your health and you agreed that something had to be done, then I guess it's something you're going to have to adapt to. I'm sure that is tough and I can fully understand your resentment in that regard.
As an adult you have total agency over what you choose to do - you don't have to do what you're told all the time. Maybe just try and work within the framework they provide and claim back enough control to feel a little bit happier?
Judging by how hard you clearly work, however, the first thing I'd be looking to do is to cut back on some of those working hours, if you can. You deserve a break.
Wishing you the best of luck x

What rules, exactly, are you referring to? Are you having to account for every morsel that passes your lips to the nutritionist?

Wow I'm not quite sure what your trying to say?
That you dislike eating now?
But I'm truly sorry you are having a hard time.
Three months is still very early out. Trust me thing will change and you will feel more back to normal in the months to come.

Lol! Didn't know people still got this!!
Ok I found this at the pirate store for you..,