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**Trigger warning: domestic abuse** My name is Georgia, I am 27, and I have been 'bigger' for my entire adult life, and a lot of my childhood too. I have PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome) insulin resistant type, and an Underactive Thyroid, both of which cause me to put on weight quickly, retain weight, and makes losing weight extremely difficult. I can't even remember the countless amounts of fad diets I have been on, or the amount of times I have tried to lose weight, but failed again and again. When I was 18 I was going to the gym 5-6 times a week for over an hour, I was doing HIIT training and Tai Chi, and I was jogging, eating well etc, but I still only managed to lose 2 stone in a year - make it make sense! I didn't know back then that I had underlying conditions that made it hard for me to lose weight, so I internalised a lot of the guilt in not being able to get healthy, and it resulted in me putting on around 6 stone from then until now. I was also a victim of domestic abuse/violence, and a lot of the verbal abuse that I suffered was centred around my weight - constantly being told by my ex-partner that I was fat, he would pinch my thighs, tummy, arms etc, telling me he was seeing how many inches I could lose. It completely broke me, and I started binge eating in secret. He ended up leaving me, telling me that he could no longer be with me due to my weight and how it made me sexually unattractive. I think I am probably just over 20 stone now. My back hurts when I walk, I cannot look in any mirrors without feeling low, I don't feel comfortable going out in public, and I am exhausted all the time. Every time I went to my GP about something, I was always told I needed to lose weight, as if it were a miracle cure and so simple to do just by trying hard enough. It was always blamed on me not putting in enough effort - and those in the UK will know that the NHS isn't a simple thing to navigate and the waiting lists for obesity support are long and often disheartening. Around 2 years ago I was put on a waiting list for weight loss management with the NHS. I was finally accepted in September of 2023. This is a year long commitment to the weight loss management pathway (Tier 3), in which you have to lose 5% of your weight in order to then be put on to another waiting list for a referral for the actual WLS (Tier 4). I have been told that this can take a further 4-6 years. I had a harrowing thought that by the time my WLS actually came around, I'd be well into my 30s, still desperately unhappy with myself, and I would have put on even more weight and probably be immobile. I can no longer do this to myself. I deserve better. I made the decision to look into private weight loss surgery, and I had a free consultation with a recommended surgeon just before Christmas 2023. This was genuinely the first time that a medical professional sat me down and talked to me with some humanity about my weight. He told me that with my conditions (particularly the insulin resistance, and hormonal imbalance), that my metabolic rate needed an entire reset, and this was not possible to do without surgical intervention. He explained that the difficulties I have had in trying to lose weight and being unable to, are not my fault (though of course I accept responsibility that getting here in the first place is my fault), and that surgery is recommended as perhaps the only thing that will enable me to lose the weight. I have never felt so seen, and so heard. I booked in my surgery for May 2024 there and then. So, now I start my journey, and I was looking for support, and here I am. I look forward to posting on here and using this thread to update everyone once I have had my surgery! I am quite an open and honest person, so if anyone wants to reach out to talk, my inbox is open

I just got the call today that my surgery is scheduled for February 7th! I'm both excited and nervous, I knew this day would come, but I'm still in shock 🤣

Day 1 of The pre opt Diet! We got this! Surgery date is Dec 20th. Lets gooooooo!

Hello all, We are back on...Day 4 of liquid diet. 11 days before the bypass operation. My cravings (pizza especially) come and go fast. I have been dreaming of food. On that note i have been getting a little repurcussions from my family as its going to happen very soon. Some comments -You wont be fun anymore. Like you wont drink and eat with us! - There is no point to order Pizza with you as it was my favourite meal and I can only eat 1 slice and other comments... Its making me feel bad and questionning but I am doing this for me and not others! I need to stay strong!

Indeed, that's an awful thing to say. I have no idea what reasons some people might have to make such comments.

Happy to have you!!! I have been overweight most of my life, my first diet was at 12 with Weight Watchers because mom kept telling me that If I lost 20lbs I would be so pretty (it was never about health). My dad would tell me that I would never have a boyfriend because I was fat or I would struggle with acceptance because of my weight. I did not have my first relationship until I was 20 because of my self poor image ( I was about 240lbs at this point). Ended up marrying him and he was the most emotionally, verbally, sexually, physically and mentally abusive human being. We moved across the country and that's when the abuse got worse. He would degrade me and tell me no on would want me because I was disgusting and he had to imagine other women while we were intimate. We ended up having a daughter together and she was the best thing that's ever happened to me, but after 10 long years I left with my daughter when she was 18months! When I finally left I was 325lbs. Since then It opened me to a whole new world opened up for me and my daughter. I was able to focus on just us and my health was something that I needed to control- I started working out, eating right and got down to 240lbs met the love of my life and now I have happy weight. He is the best thing that has every happened to my daughter and I. Her bio-dad is not in her life, and we ended up having a son together and I shot back up to 297lbs. After some health scares with my family I decided WLS is the way to go!! I am set to have the Sleeve on the 24th!

Prior to COVID, (which delayed my treatment which was to start in 2020) tooth decay and gum issues. I was to get some work done including filling, root canals, and possible bone graphs to my jaw. Due to life, I have yet to have this done but am working on it. I wanted to share that I have found that the condition is called pernicious anemia (of the teeth and gums). There are many health issues that this can cause. This is a medical issue, not a dental issue. You will likely have to educate your physician (who must write the referral correctly) and and your oral surgeon. The request to your insurance company MUST include the medical information. If they turn you down, appeal it so you can send the information yourself. Just be sure you use trusted medical sites (Mayo, Cleveland Clinic, NIHA, are good places to start. 11 years ago there was no information available, and/or not provided to me. This disease is NOT a dental issue. It effects your autoimmune system and others. Left untreated, though RARE, can cause death. Please don't panic over the "death" part, it is very rare. If you have broken, cracking, teeth coming out, gum issues (even tongue issues), this might apply. As I mentioned do your homework, note your references and talk to your primary care doctor. Get the help you need. I have 8 teeth that need to be pulled now plus some "repairs" to others. I have opted for removal of all my teeth at one time and implants. A note about implants: dentures do not stimulate your gums and jaw which is imperative to keeping you jaw from decaying. My primary care doctor, after I educated him 🙄 agrees with me , BTW. There are dental clinics out there that do a one and done treatment where you can have your teeth extracted and get your implants the same day (my option to prevent more surgeries). Keep that in mind. I hope this information is helpful for someone suffering my fate.

One thing about mental hunger or cravings is that they're almost never strong enough for me to actually get into a car and drive to a store to buy something. The first few weeks, I would end up digging until I found something else to eat, but the fewer options you make available, the more you have to admit to yourself that you're just bored or (as is often my case since I work from home) procrastinating. There have been times I would find myself staring into my pantry and I'd have to ask myself what exactly I thought I would find there. It's all canned beans and pasta sauce now. Generally I just ask myself if I want a snack badly enough to drive to the store for it, and the answer is always no. Oh, and I do all my grocery shopping online for pickup now to minimize the chances of throwing impulse buys into my cart.

It's only been a month and a half. Way way too early to decide the surgery has been a fail. You could be having hormone issues, water weight, or it could be a natural fluctuation. I always gained 4-6 pounds when a stall hit and then when it broke, I'd immediately lose that weight plus an additional 2-3 pounds right off the bat. How is your exercising? How often are you eating? Are you dinking anything carbonated? How are your calories and carbs?

Could be water weight, could be hormones, could be the day of the week, could just be...your turn to have a minor setback. You'll have some fluctuation here and there and as you lose more and the weight loss slows, you may notice it more. This is not a "failure" and it's destructive to frame it that way to yourself. It's part of the process. It's going to be ok. Don't beat yourself up. Don't sabotage yourself. Just keep going.