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Don't waste the pretty

Entries in this blog

 

New York

Just got back from New York. Had a great time and the good thing was that I walked my arse off every day so I lost almost 2 kg. Bought a great pair of Sevens Jeans and they look pretty good on me - even if I do say so myself.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Latest Measurements

Took my measurements again today because that's what my diary told me to do. 105.5cm Bust, 93cm waist and 121.5cm hip. Since the last time I measured in mid Feb I've lost 3cm from Waist, 3cm from Bust and 1.5 from Hip. It's a bugger how the hips are the last to go and that's where I really need to move it. I must say I wans't expecting much of a loss so I'm thrilled with that. By the way I was 90.3kg this morning.
Fleur

Fleur

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Filled At last - thank god almighty

Haven't written in my journal for a few days not... busy at work. Well my big news is that I've had a fill. 1ml and I already can feel that I'm not as hungry. The bad news is that I put on 1kg over easter taking me back up to 102. So I'm hoping fingers crossed that the fill me reverse this. Well, I guess that's what lap band is supposed to do.   Today I ate   Coffee water 1/2 cup savory mince 6 Anzac biscuits (well it is anzac day!) skim latte 1 piece of home made pizza water coffee   My Dietician trudy has given me a beginners lap band meal plan. I believe I need some structure at this stage of the game so I'm aiming to stay on the eating plan for the duration of May. I have my big work event at the end of May so I really use the weight loss.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Back to the 80's

WellI haven't been here for a while. Today I broke the dreaded 90kg mark and weighed in at 89kg. I have been 90kg for a month and getting rather sick of it but this morning I had a breakthrough. I have started making a big jug of fresh veggie and fruit juice. It lasts me 3 to 4 days I love it and I have noticed a big difference in my digestion.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Another Fill

I had another fill today. Just .5ml this time but I can already feel more restriction. I'm down to 100 kg now so that's 7kg lost.   I'm still not making great food choices so I have to work now with my dietician to eat better. After all anyone can cheat the band and I never want to be one of those people. So now the band is doing it's job and taking away much of the hinger I have to do my part and eat better.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

'No thank you I'm full'

Went to see Trudy the dietician today and we agreed on setting a meal plan at leat for a while till I get used to eating less and tuning in to my body's signs of being full and hungry. Since the fill I am finding it much easier to go without eating between meals. Generally I'm less hungry. Today I had a lunch meeting and chose the chicken curry. It was beautiful but I left about 1/3 of it on the plate....Me!!!! leaving food on my plate!!!! unheard of - until now.   Today I ate coffee water medication english muffin and egg small latte fresh juice Chicken curry very small piece of grilled chicken Coffee Water   I bought the fabric for my dress for the Goldie awards today and took it up to my tailor. I'm very excited about it now. I also bought some earrings and some beautiful crystal beads to make a broach for the dress. I've set myself a 4 week challenge for the weeks leading up to the goldies starting next Monday. It's generally a challenge to look after myself better including diet, skincare, exercise etc. I have a plan and I'm going to do it. I want to look my best for the Goldies.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

More Fill Please

Had myslef another fill last week. I'm now at 4ml in a 5 ml band. Really do feel the restriction now and I'm enjoying it. I hit the big 10kg loss today which I am very excited about. Here's is an interesting thing I learnt this week - if you have a couple of glasses of wine or any alcohol before eating the restriction will be less because you are relaxed. I tried it out and it's true - bugger it!!
Fleur

Fleur

2
 

2nd Fill under my belt

Last Tuesday I had my second fill - another 1ml. I have felt really good restriction all week but have felt a little easing off today but I'm not hungry as such just when I eat I dont feel as restricted. I'm back down to 101kg which is what I was a week after surgery. I am booked infor another fill next Tuesday and I'm hoping for another fill. My doctor said I will probaby need at least 3ml. Today is Mothers Day:   I ate:   Coffee Sm bowl yogurt Coffee 1 Glass of Champagne Chicken & Avocado entre Fish and salad - only ate 2/3 Nudie ice block 2 glasses champagne
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Afternoon tea crisis

Yesterday we had family over to celebrate my daughters 3rd Birthday. I served afternoon tea and with out even thinking I ate a couple of scones and an egg sandwich. I didnt have lunch or dinner so I dont feel terribly bad but I am just wondering if it's normal to not feel any restriction after eating that. I think I really need a fill. I see Dr Bowden on Wed. Morning. Hovering a smidge above 101kg. I'd like to be an easy 101 by Wednesday.   Today I ate Scrambled egg - 3 eggs coffee 1 1/2 cups yoghurt refried beans 1/2 avocado and mashed up egg 1 cup yoghurt coffee Mashed Cauliflower coffee Matamucil Medications Water   Yesterday I ate   1 cup saltana bran with hot milk latte 2 glasses champagne 2 small scones with cram and jam 1 egg & lettace sandwich very small slice cake coffee 3-4 m&m's
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Measurments

Today it was time to do my first monthy measurments:   Bust 114cm Wast 104cm Hip 130cm   Pretty sure this is reduction on my starting measurments. Did pretty well food wise except for a bit of chocolate, but I stick to the quantities and times.   Today I ate:   Small Mango Smoothie 1/2 coffee 2 eggs, hoummus and goats cheese puree Optifast with banana Salmon risotto coffee   I picked att he kids eater eggs - all up I had about 75g
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Maggic Mushies

Today I ate 1 cup saltana bran with hot skim milk Skim Latte 1 cup vegetable soup scrambled eggs - 4 Glass Nudie juice Optifast with banana Refried beans, avocade mash and tablespoon finely grated cheese Coffee 2 doses metamucil medications Lots of water
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Bit Hungry

Today I felt real hunger for the first time. I was worried about eating more and not really feeling full so I called the Doctor. She said that it sounds like the fluids are passing through the band well and I may need to go on to puree's sooner. I may aslo have my first fill when I see Dr Bowden next week.   Today I ate: Optifast with Banana 1 1/2 cups vegie soup Coffee Prune juice Optifast with tinned fruit 1 1/2 cups pea soup puree tinned apricots 2 cups vegie curry soup Water Medication
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Speeding Ticket

I've got an idea, maybe they should give out speeding tickets for eating. That might help me slow down. I am really struggling with eating only half a cup over 20 minutes. Today I used a timer and I got to about 15 minutes. Now I need to try and stretch it to 20.   Today I ate   Optifast with banana drink coffee avocado & egg mash - 10 min roast vegies, egg, chick pea mix - 15 min left over rissoto - 10 min Lots of water   Today I received an email from Michelle, another Brisbane girl banded by Blair last week. I look forward to meeting her.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

I'm with the band

Small Latte Banana Smoothie Latte 1 1/2 cups potato and leek soup Water Water Water soluable multi vit. 1 1/2 cups zuccini soup   Another good day. Took my waterproof bandages off today and I was surprised at how small the uncissions are. I take the steri strips off on Thursday.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Slow Down

Yesterday I went to see my Doc. for the 2 weeks post op visit. He's really happy with everything but wouldn't fill me just yet. I have to wait another 10 days. I then went to see my dietician who gave me to low down on the puree stage. Everything is fine except she wants me to eat half a cup of puree food with protien 6 times per day over a period of 20 minutes. Also I can't drink 10 mins before and 30 mins after a meal. The drinking isn't a problem but finding protien rich mushy food and the eating half a cup over 20 minutes - well - I'm really going to have to apply myself to this one. I understand if I don't do this I may stretch my pouch and then forevermore require more food to feel full. I guess I expected the, banb to tell me when I was full even at this early stage but it seems I have to do some of the hard work myself - fair enough!!   Today I ate:   1/2 cup yoghurt sm coffee 1/2 cup mix smoked salmon, goats cheese & hoummos water coffee Banana mashed *****Chocolate***** (bugger easter) 1/2 cup puree pizza - home made with vegies and ham Metamucil
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

And She Sleeps....

Today was a day of rest. I must of needed it becuase I had no trouble sleeping the whole day away. I'm trying not to feel guilty!! My swelling started to go down and becuase its Monday I weighed myself - 103kg. I'm pleased with that. I also went for a walk today around the lake. I just went once around and it took me 30 min with stretching at the end.   I'm still not hungry but I can easily have a couple of cups of soup and I feel satisfied but not full like I can't fit another thing in. Hope that's normal.   Today I ate:   Optifast vanilla drink blended with a banana 1/2 cup coffee 1 1/2 cup of Zuccini Soup Optifast vanilla drink with banana 2 1/2 cups of blended pea and bacon soup Hot chocolate on skim milk Coffee Water Medication Prune Juice - yick!!
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

9 days till banding

I've missed my Jounal!!!!!   I took my measurments the other day:   Bust: 115cm Waist: 105.5 cm Hip: 138 cm - Yikes!!!   Today was a bit tough. Optifast is messing with my head. I'm a bit cranky and don't want to go out much. I'm coping by having lots of nice salads and roast vegies. I also have frozen raspberries with the chocolate mousse. I allow myself to have some milk with my coffee. I just can't cope without it. Anyway tomorrow is half way with the Optifast so if I can do one week, I can do another.   I see Dr Bowden again tomorrow - my last appointment before the operation. I'm gatting a bit excited - scarry excited!!   F
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

18 Days till banding

I'm obsessed with finding out all I can before my LB day on the 30th March. I have no doubt that I am doing the right thing but what if I let myself down. I'ts hard to be confident when all else has failed in the past. If this doesnt work - then what. I consider myself of above average intelligence and faily capable but when it comes to weight loss all I've ever known is failure or limited success followed by failure. Funny, but the things that make me doubt myself are the ones that make this an appropriate option for me. I guess I'll feel better when I know what I'm dealing with, until then I'll keep on Truckin. I meet Dr Bowden tomorrow and Beres (GP) for a referral and hopefully some encouragement.   I've been eating heaps - like I'm trying to get it all in before it starts.   God knows what I'll weigh when I start on Optifast on Thursday.   Fleur
Fleur

Fleur

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I'm Banded!!!!

Well, I got home from hospital a few hours ago and while I feel pretty good now I was a total mess last night. Pain, Migrain, vomiting the works. My tummy is tender and quite swollen. I'm glad it's over. I'm on fluids for 2 weeks, then I see Dr Bowden and then puree for two weeks.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Only 3 days till banding

My God it's getting close. I just want it done now so I can start seeing results.. Since deciding to have this done I have been more honest with myself about how I look. Before, when I caught a glimps of myself in a shop window, I'd tell myself it wasn't too bad - convincing myself that I wasn't in as much trouble as I am. Now I find that I look at myself and say....'Yep, I really do need help. I've honestly tried everything and now I need this band". So I guess that's why I'm keen to get going. I see my shrink tomorrow. She's not a big fan of the lap band so it will be interesting to see what she has to say. It may be time to see a new shrink. I've made a pack with myself not to buy and clothes or shoes or spend any unnecessary money for 90 days starting on the 1st April. I want to save money becuase this operation is so expensive and I dont need any clothes especially in the size that I am now.
Fleur

Fleur

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17 Days till banding

I met my Doctor today - Dr Blair Bowden. Nice guy. Pretty calm and knowlegable. Says he's been mentored by George Fielding.   Dr Bowden said if I do nothing else but get the band - not even excercise - statistically I will be 85kg in two years. Today I would be thrilled to be 85 kg but I know I really want to be 75. This is the weight I was at school when I thought I was a hippo. Welln actually, some of the boys told be I was a hippo. Even dad made the odd comment about my weight. God strike me down if I ever say anything to Millie about her weight - never ever!!!   Andrew came with me to the appointment. God I love him.. He doesnt say much but he is so supportive. I just dont tell him enough about what I'm feeling. I also went to see Beres my GP. She happily gave me the referral and said this surgery woud be appropriate for me and said Dr Bowden had a good reputation. I'm pleased to have her blessing.   I told Dr Bowden about my fear of failure since that had always been the outsome in my endevours to lose weight. He said that of all the people with a weight problem only 5%, that's 5% actully lose weight and keep it off long term - 5+ years. The huge majority fail and that is why LB is so successful. There was a study done in Switzerland. They took 200 people put 100 of them on a regular diet exercise programme and gave them, doctor, psycologists, trainers and nutrisionists and 5 years later only 5% had kept the weight off. The other 100 people had lab band and 5 years later 80% had lost and kept off their weight. I only have 2 days before optifast starts so I need to gear up for that.   Made a pact with my walking buddy Andrea to make Monday morning our weigh in then tell each other on our walk. Used my new Polar Heart Monitor watch today. Sure did keep me going when I slackened off.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Banding Eve

Oh my God, I never expected to be this nervous. I gave myself the mother of all migranes last night worrying about it.   I feel quite teary. I just want it to be over so I can get on with it. The anticipation is killing me.   I'm also still lacking confidence - what if I turn into a milkshake drinking, icecream monster!!!! What then!!! What if I becoem one of these crazy people who for whatever, deep rooted, reason want to stay fat and cheat the band. This is my last and best hope of living without a weight problem. God even writing that down....'life without a weight problem'..... seems so overwealming & exciting & scary & the impossible dream.   Soooo... here I go. What started out as a lightening bolt wake up call a couple of months ago is now a reality. Wish me luck....... F
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

7 days till banding

Not a great day. I stayed home all day. I feel like I need to stay home but if I'm home I have greater access to the fridge - bummer. Today I had to eat something other than vegies, berries or a shake - so I had some cheese and bacon. My dietician siad if I was desperate have some protien. I do feel better for it but I'm disappointed in myself for needing to. I find the afternoon the hardest. I'm realy hungry late afternoon but too early for dinner.   God this really isnt easy - is it?? I have just read some posts by ladies who are gaining weight and still hungry after banding. This scares me because I kind of expected to do pretty well in the weks just after banding.   I thought that I'd get hungry but feel full quickly and not feel hungry again until the next meal. I kind of even expect to have the odd through up but I will be terribly, terribly dissapointed if I dont loose weight or god forbid gain weight.   I need to hear some good stories to make feel confident again.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

Is a breakout really all that bad?

You know that saying....'for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction'.... Well, that would be the best way to discribe my day yesterday. I was invited to a lunch for work. I really wanted to go so I could have a propper meal but also becuase there would be a lot of colleagues there I could see. Anyway, steak was served which was fine but it was the 8 or so glasses of champagne and the Maccas I had on the way home that sent me off the rails.   I remember this happening when I had been on Optifast in the past. There is only so many days I can do it before I break out - usually in a spectacular way.   Last night I felt really disapointed in myself so this morning I went for a walk with my son and hoped back on the Optifast wagon. Funny thing is that even thought I had a lapse it has made me feel much more confident that I will make it to next Thursday OK. So maybe a little breakout is necessary to keep on track. I wouldn't recommend a triple cheese burger but maybe a moderate breakout does more good than harm in the long run.   I'm off to the pharmacy to buy more Optifast.
Fleur

Fleur

1
 

I'm off and racing

Today is my first 'normal' day with the band. A good friend of mine is up from Sydney to help me out and she has made me a couple of yummy vegatable soups. Today I ate: Banana Smoothie Sm Skim Latte Little bit of yoghurt (few teaspoons at a time. All up less than 1/2 cup. 1 1/2 cups of potato and leek soup 1 1/2 cups of roast vegetable soup Lots of water and a soluable mulit vitamin.   I must say I did that pretty easily and wasn't really hungry at any stage. My tummy is tender and bloated but I'm getting around OK. I even went to the shops today which was probably not a great idea but I felt good.   I just watched Super Size Me - Holy Crap what a movie!!! My kids arn't going to see the inside a Maccas for a long, long time.   Tomorrow I'm going for a walk around the lake.
Fleur

Fleur

1
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