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NW Island Girl's Journal
 

Getting restless

20 October 2006   Passed the 10-week pre-surgery mark this week and am getting restless. I wish I didnt' have to wait so long to get the band. I want to get going!! But as a self-pay, the only way to do it is to go to Mexico, and the only way to get it done in Mexico requires being away mid-week, and I just can't skip any mid-week rehearsals for Singers or church choir until after Christmas. So I'm waiting.   The growing number (at least five, maybe more) of Island Bandits (or soon-to-be) are working toward organizing a support group. Booklady has initiated a get together on Sun. afternoon, Nov. 12. It will be good to spend an hour with people going through or having had the same experience. I need that for encouragement while it WAIT.   I am trying to incorporate various Bandit routines now, to make the transition smoother, such as drinking small amounts of water every 15 minutes. I bought a little timer last weekend to help me, and about every other day I manage to remember to start it, and remember to keep restarting it for about half a day. I still have almost 10 weeks to get this simple lifestyle thing down, and as Booklady pointed out, nothing bad happens if you don't stick to the schedule rugorously.   She looks wonderful. Has been banded since late July with one fill, and has lost 40 pounds. If I emulate her success, I can be under 200 pounds by the time of the Singers' spring concert. That will mean a lot to me. There are lots of clothes in my closet that I'm looking forward to wearing again that won't fit until I get donw under 200 pounds.
NW Island Girl

NW Island Girl

1
tianealperry's Journal
 

BAD ATTITUDE or GREIVING today???

:cheer2: I must start off by saying thank GOD for another day:clap2: although I might not sound greatful I'am truly.   at 8am my attitude got read bad, like as soon as I got out of my sisters car I went from to :angry !!!!   I love my job it EASY, but I will admit a few of the people here are some simple, back stabbing, liver sucking roaches!!!:omg: I dont pay any attention to them. I very frustrated about my weight my clothes have looked horrible on me all week:cry my last pair of shoes are busting on the side:cry!   If anyone out there prays to GOD please pray for me and my mental & emotional wellness. :help: :help: :help: :help: :help: :help: :help:   thanks for letting me vent   :angel::angel: :angel: :angel: :angel: :angel: :angel: :angel: :angel: :angel: R.I.P. DADDY & Karla M. Thomas*best-friend*   :think :think :think :think :think :think :think :think :think :think :think :think :think :think :think :think :think :think :think
tianealperry

tianealperry

2
mejomojogolow's Journal
 

September 19, 2006

Banded 9/20/06 by Dr. Spivak. First time to Journal today. Went to my 1st Support Group in Cafe Express on Six Pines in the Woodlands (Texas). Glad I went & learned alot. The ladies were so nice and helpful. I will go again. I have not gotten a fill yet. Its hard to tell when to go. I would say in the next week or two. I have lost 16 lbs so far but seem to be behind when looking at everyone else. :rolleyes I am very postive & very motivatived. I do need to walk more & exercise. Banded 9/20/06 247/231/147
mejomojogolow

mejomojogolow

1
DouglasP13's Journal
 

Good Day

Well, it's a good day. I had my first couple of tests today, quite painless. Which is what I like. I say, 'No pain? Hey, no pain!!!! *smile*' Okay, I know it's stupid, but I like stupid humor. Anyway, just to let you all know, I'm keeping this a pretty big secret. Even when I get the surgery done, I'm not telling hardly anyone. I have a very few friends who I have told, but not many. So count yourselves lucky! Every time they know I'm on a diet, they start telling me how good I look cuz of the weight I've lost. most of the time, I have gained weight, or stayed the same. It just shows that they really don't know, or care enough to know. Okay, I have to get this off my chest. I have this really close friend, adn we do lots and lots of things together. She is probably my closest friend right now. Yes, just friend, I know what you were thinking. Well anyway, I told her about me doing this surgery thing, and she supports me totally. However, after I originally told her, I haven't brought it up again, except to say that I was going to my first dr's appointment. Well, I'm still waiting on her to ask how that went. It's like she just doesn't care about what's going on inside of me. Just another one of my 'friends' who could care less if I'm okay, or not. Well, I'm tired of chasing after my friends, and continually trying to bring them into my life. If they want to know anything, they need to go out of their way and ask me! At least a simple, "How are you doing?" or "Are you okay?" or how about, "How did your dr's appointment go? Oh, and I haven't even mentioned all those people at church who just love to talk about me, and put me down in anything I do in my personal life. And some of them are supposedly my good friends. One of them asked me to go out to eat with them the other night. What a hypocrit!!!!! Okay, enough complaining, I'm actually in a good mood. I just love complaining. Keep reading, and I'm sure you will hear lots, probably even things you don't want to know! Cheers!!!
DouglasP13

DouglasP13

2
harlito's Journal
 

Double takes

I am getting alot of double takes from people. The more places I go back to after surgery the more people are doing double takes. I can sense that they see something different about me but they can't quite figure it out. It's hilarious! The other day I walked out of my apartment and ran into my old neighbor who had moved back into the complex. He looked at me and said, "you look like you've... I mean... have you been?" LOL! He couldn't even say it! He couldn't bring up the subject of weight even if it would have been good. Maybe he thought I had an illness? Didn't matter to me. People can tell that the weight is disappearing and that's good. Keep the double takes coming.
harlito

harlito

1
AngelaT's Journal
 

The right choice

I feel so much better now that i switched docs! i was soooo anxious and the moment I decided to change dos, I felt better, lighter.... perhaps I should have gone with Dr. Aceves to begin with. I really need to follow my intuition always!
AngelaT

AngelaT

1
ms883's Journal
 

Ready for phase 2, makin' me crabby

Ok - enough of this liquid diet and no band stuff. I want to get this show on the road. 5 days to go. 5 days and counting... Luckily, only 1 more day at work. Yeah right - It's all going with me to the hospital. :faint:   I'm also hungry. Doc said to lose 17 lbs before surgery. Goodie. Here I am still trying to lose that damn 17 lbs. Same 17 lbs I've lost and gained who-knows-how-many-times-before. Pain in my rear.   Not only am I hungry, I had a client absolutely get creamed in court today. I watched his excellent case to change custody end up with him getting supervised visitation because the EX lied. I know she lied, my client knows she lied, her attorney knows she lied, but she lied to CPS and they are involved. 24 hours ago, the CPS recommendation was for my client to have custody. Then they interviewed the Ex. I work so hard only to be twarted by a liar. I tell you, she'll get hers eventually. This judge hates liars. Small victories, won by lies are not worth what this judge will do to her in 45 days when we get back to court. In the meantime, I have to deal with this loon at CPS who does not understand lawyers and how we protect our clients. Wanted to disparage me because I had my client's step son secure his own attorney - and the step-son's attorney will not let the step son talk to CPS. My CPS worker really needs a legal education, seems to think she's above the law.   And, I'm doing all of this really, really, hungry after 2-1/2 weeks of a nutty, almost no food diet. Kept my cool in court. I hope that's the Lexapro working.   Keep your fingers crossed for me, or I may blow it in front of this judge. That would not be a good thing.   Ms883
ms883

ms883

1
Jaclyn's Journal
 

My Road to Happiness

All I ever wished for was to be beautiful. I couldn't look in the mirror without seeing something wrong with myself. My hair was wrong, my clothes didn't look right, and I just couldn't get makeup to improve my face. I was depressed, sad, and disappointed with myself. I felt alone, like no one ever understood me. I didn't get along with my family, isolated myself, barely ever went out, and sometimes even wished I would die. After endless nights of crying myself to sleep, locking myself in my room, and being afraid to look at myself in the mirror, I knew something had to change. For many years, I didn't realize that I was actually a beautiful person who had a lot going for herself. Eventually, I started taking better care of myself, and little by little, my confidence grew. Suddenly, it didn't matter as much what people thought of me. People started noticing a difference, and I started interacting with others around me without wondering what they thought of me. What I didn't know was that in order for everyone to think highly of me, I had to think highly of myself first. I have ugly days and critique myself in the mirror; that's normal. But I have overcome the desire to be something I'm not. My weight loss journey started on September 18th, 2005. My parents decided to help me change my life by getting the lap-band surgery done in Canyon City, Colorado by Dr. Timothy Brown. This was the best decision that I have ever made in my life, because I had struggled with my weight for so many years. I tried every diet and exercise program on the face of the planet only to lose and then regain more than I started out with. I am so happy with my progress, because I reached my goal before I had ever anticipated. I took anti-depressants to cope with life. Today I have taken on many new challenges and am enjoying life to the fullest. I have always had a problem with leaving food on my plate. It comes from being told to finish everything no matter what, and I do have an obsession with food. I think about it constantly. When I am stressed, excited, sad, alone, or even happy, I want to eat. Its called emotional eating. While I'm eating, I feel nothing. Sometimes, feeling nothing can be bliss. I think in large terms for food. I've had eating disordered issues for years. I used to eat constantly, large meals and then secretly between meals. The thing is that I never got full. Now with the band in, I now got the chance to really know what the feeling of being full really is. Another problem is portion control. The bigger the better. The more the merrier. And I love every bite of it. I don't care much about food until the night time. This is a habit that started when I was a child. I loved to have a little picnic all by myself, in the night. Maybe it's because I have always been a loner, maybe it's because I felt ashamed of the food thing and wanted to do it under the cover of darkness. Somehow I think it's a combination of things, the two I mentioned, plus physical tiredness, hunger from not eating all day, and I tend to replay all the events of the day in my head. Eating disorder is a problem full of lies. It tricks you in the way you see yourself and think others see you. It feels big because it is time consuming and revolves around food and your thoughts. It is an illness, not a sin. And God will love me always, no matter what I do. He's always there for His children, and I'm His precious daughter. He loves me more than I can imagine. And He always will. But why do I feel so useless sometimes when it comes to food? Sometimes I feel so guilty, so guilty that I want to stop eating because it takes over me. It's hard, the question you pose about looking down on those who are overweight or fat. I realize that binge eating is a disorder as well, and that we're all in it together; whether we starve or binge, we're all fighting for control in our lives. I think usually the idea of binge eating disorder scares me, because I can so easily imagine being out of control and eating too much. But now that I'm on a meal plan and am eating a regulated amount of calories, instead of restricting, I no longer have any desire to binge, like I did when I was eating less than a tenth of what I am now. Where has the time gone? Where did all that fat go? Where is the person in the picture who sat there so miserable and in such agony? Sometimes I miss her due to leaving a life behind that I once knew so well. But there are better days ahead. I am being noticed, and there are no regrets. No remorse for what I have done to myself. I am grateful that there are people who understand and I am so thankful to all who support this decision I have made. If there are people in the process of considering the surgery, I think they can achieve at being their best, living a better and healthier life. Thank you for taking the time to read my story.      
glossylips9084

glossylips9084

1
lunasprite's Journal
 

a little about me :) my first blog!

I went and saw Dr Shayani at Loyola University on Tuesday. He was so nice and informative. He answered all my questions before I had time to ask them! I will be having the Lap Band surgery done soon and I can not wait.   I can't wait to have my life back, to be thin enough to buy clothes that don't cost an arm and a leg, to ride rides at Six Flags, to walk my dog without having to cut it short because my back hurts. I have been large my entire life.. and I want to feel alive. I want kids as well. and with me being large, my chances are cut to less than half! It has been my dream since I was a little girl to have my own kids.. :bored
lunasprite

lunasprite

2
Kee's Journal
 

more pics

Trying to find as many 'before' pic as possible to help me gauge my weight loss in pictures.. Here I am in Miami when Hubby and I went to a Heat game.. My stomach was (is) really big.:cry     Here is a pic of me and Hubby at the Miami Heat Game
keekahari

keekahari

3
Kee's Journal
 

nightmares

Nothing exciting going on today... but i did have this weird dream last night. I was going in for surgery and there were all these medical people around me talking and I couldnt hear and I just kept saying "where is my surgeon, where is my surgeon" okay, so now I am having nightmares are the big day... How fun. :rolleyes I guess maybe subconciously I am just coming to terms with the whole thing. I have been operated on before so going under really doesnt bother me, but I dont know.. just getting a few butterflies maybe.
keekahari

keekahari

2
My Journey
 

10-18-06 Practicing the Liquid Diet

I have begun to practice the liquid diet. I already know that it is going to be very very difficult and I want to start preparing myself in hopes that it wont be such a horrible shock to my body (even though it will be good for it!) I have begun replacing one meal with a Target version of slimfast and be very very watchful of what I do eat b/c that is what I am going to always have to do. I just weighed myself yesterday and I weigh about 273 depending on the time of day, and I took this weight in the morning, which I have heard is the best time to do so. Tomorrow I am going with my boyfriend for the the final consultation with the surgeon. I am looking forward to having my boyfriend, Joe, be able to meet the surgeon. Wish me luck! :peace:
Veggestyle

Veggestyle

1
sharlee's Journal
 

4 days

I have 4 days until surgery, I'm so excited and yet very nervous! I have a heatial herna that will also have to be removed, scary, ugh! I will get through this with my Faith and Family!
sharlee

sharlee

2
My journey
 

At the beginning

October 19th- I have my 1st mtg w/ Dr. Woodruff Monday morning 10/23/06 at the St. Elizabeth and St. Joseph Weight Loss Center in Youngstown, Ohio. Afterwards I am scheduled w/ Dr. Esperon for my psych eval. I spoke w/ Dr. Esperon on the phone and he seems extremely nice and I am interested in mtg w/ him. I am getting the ball rolling b/c I wish to have this done before the holidays. I have tried dieting for so many years but as soon as I take one step off track I gaining it all back plus some. My heaviest weight was 264lbs and that was in October of 2004 and I think now I am about 250lbs. I did lose around 50 lbs doing weight watchers but I have slowly gained it all back. Since I work at the hospital that I am having the surgery at I have access to a lot of support and help from co-workers. Everyone I have spoke with so far have been extremely nice and have made this decision an easy one to make. I will let you know how the mtg w/ the dr.'s go on Monday.   :clap2: God bless, Becks   "Your body is the baggage you must carry through life. The more excess the baggage, the shorter the trip."~~A.H. Glasgow
ysuknow

ysuknow

1
Teresita's Journal
 

Help I want a new addiction

I want to start drinking or smoking. OK I don't really want to start smoking because it stinks but if it didn't .....and the cancer thingy but OK I want to start drinking. People who drink just have so much find in their mind. Right now my brain cells are not having a good time. If I get them drunk they will think they are having a good time therefore I will have a good time.   Dag it, I want an escape. I am tired of stressing and having to worry about things and dealing with them. I want someone else to deal with the stupid stuff. I don't want to have to go buy a drill because I don't know how many watts, volts, mega hertz or whatever to get. Unfortunatley I keep this silly dam smile on my face:) .   Oh :notagree I could go to sleep like some people do. They can just in the bed and sleep for hours at any given time, get up, go back to sleep. That one is safer and you won't eat while you are sleep.
Teresita

Teresita

4
wootsie73's Journal
 

Forgot a couple of things.....

I forgot to put a few things in my first entry, so I decided to go ahead and put them in now. Not only did I have all of these other things going on all summer, but I am allergic to Sulfa and was told by my former doc that I could take Glucosamine with MSM. Well, guess what? I can't! I broke out in a rash all over my body and was miserable. I went to my PCP and she told me to take Claritin in the morning and Benadryl at night for a few days. WHAT THE HELL EVER!!!! I was so miserable and those 2 meds did nothing to help, so I went to the dermatologist again the next day. She put me on Prednisone, bad for the weight!, and Atarax for the itching. My regular doc was full, so I saw her partner. The good thing about that visit is that the other doc saw the thing on my right arm and injected it with Solu-Medrol, another steroid, and it's completely gone now!
wootsie73

wootsie73

1
wootsie73's Journal
 

My Journey so far.......

Well, I first found this website on 10-05-06 and posted on my first night. I still don't know exactly how to navigate the website, but I'm learning everyday. Today is October 19th and I have been on this website much of the day. I have no life, so that's ok. Actually, we've been waiting all week for our boxer, Baylee, to have puppies, so I can't leave the house until she has the pups - orders from my mom. LOL Vacation last week to Ruidoso, NM was fun, but we all went off of our diets big time. The last few months have been very difficult for me, so I thought I would make a record of it here. First of all, I'm an RN and self treat myself a lot of the time. I don't know an RN who doesn't. Anyway, this past summer started off with a bang going to the Dermatologist for my hand. I thought I had scabies (self diagnosis) and it was continuing to get worse, so I finally decided to see a doc after trying may remedies for scabies on my own. I asked my dad for a reference since I am only visiting here - long story - and he had a dermatologist. So, I went to see about my hand. That's where my fun filled summer began! The doc said I had exema on my hand and gave me some ointment for it. However, I had a place right below my elbow in my arm that had recently come up and I originally thought it was a bruise. Well, the doc called it a fancy name, (I'm a cardiac nurse so I don't know much about skin disorders) and told me that it could be a sign of diabetes. I told her I didn't have a PCP when she asked me, so she insisted I go see someone and recommended a couple of docs. I went to see Dr. Hutson around the 1st of June. My B/P was 190/98 on my first visit and my weight was 265 lbs, down from my high of 315 a year before. She went balistic! Before I left her office, I had new prescriptions for several meds I was supposed to be taking, including K-Dur so I could take my Lasix, which I had not been taking. I also had an appointment with a cardiologist and a gastroenterologist. She wanted a pulmologist, but I told her I had to pay co-pays and needed to take it a little slower. I also had lots of lab tests drawn. I went to see Dr. Rivera, the cardiologist, the next week. My EKG looked good, but he said it was a miracle that it did. My BP had dropped to 130/80 due to the dieuretics, but he was not happy in the least. He was really upset when he found out I was a cardiac nurse. He told me about "his diet" and ordered lots of tests to be done the next week. "His diet" is basically Atkins without the fat. Plus, he told me I had to stop smoking. Well, I started the diet the next day and had an echocardiogram, a non-exercise stress test, and a CT-Scan done the following week, but I still continued to smoke. The CT-Scan showed an 80% blockage in my left renal artery and an 80% blockage of my left illiac artery. I was told I would be scheduled for stent placement in their onsite facility, which I had placed on July, 28th on the left renal artery. He told me I would need to have 2 stents placed in the illiac arteries because the blockage was at the bifercation and would cause the right artery to collapse. So, I went into the hospital and had those 2 stents placed on August, 23rd, my daughters birthday. At the time, I had severe diarrhea that had started a couple of weeks before. Also during June, I went to the gastroenterologist and had an EGD and colonoscopy. He said my stomach looked like it had been sanded with sand paper, but my colon was a ok. On top of that, Dr. Hutson decided I needed to have a glucose tolerance test. I was either having a test, seeing a doctor, or having a procedure done at least once a week all summer. I finally saw the pulmologist and was told my asthma was doing well, but I still needed oxygen and my CPAP to sleep. I already knew that, but I also told him I really needed to stop smoking, so he gave me Chantix to help me. The diarrhea still continued. Dr. Hutson ordered all kinds of stool tests and they were all negative, so I had to go back to the gastroenterologist. He did another colonoscopy with biopsies to see if he could find something microscopically since my colon looked normal. I now am being treated for Ulcerative Colitis on top of everything else. A few weeks ago I had to go see Dr. Rivera because I was feeling dizzy and my hands and fingers were tingling. I was very luck that day because he took me off of all of my B/P meds and 1 dieuretic. Yeah!!:clap2: :clap2: :clap2: :clap2: I was really doing well until I went on vacation last week. I have stopped smoking for the most part, but I still smoke ocassionally, which is not a good thing. However, I first gave up drinking Cokes, which I was totally addicted to, went on the diet Dr. Rivera told me to, and stopped smoking all at the same time. My nerves are TOTALLY shot! I am going to have to stop smoking completely because my B/P has started inching up since the vacation. I know the smoking is because I am very nervous most of the time and the Lexapro isn't helping like the Xanax I was on, but I will eventually get past it with the small dose of Xanax I have started taking again. Long first entry, but I wanted to document all of this. Which brings me to my introduction to this website. I was searching the web to see if Medicare covered Lap-Band surgery and was elated to find out it did. So, now I'm finding out every bit of information I can and searching for a surgeon. I have an appointment with Dr. Hutson tomorrow and I have plans to discuss this with her. I am hoping for a referral to a doc in the Dallas area. I'm going home with my daughter tomorrow after my appointment to help care for the new Boxer puppies that still haven't arrived, much to our dismay! She is moving to Sherman, TX, so I will be close to the docs in Dallas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am hoping for band placement around the end of this year!
wootsie73

wootsie73

1
DouglasP13's Journal
 

Initial Meeting.....

Ok, yesterday I found out that my insurance is not going to cover the surgery. It's because my company has excluded it. I have spoken with both the insurance and the company I work for. I dont' believe I will have much luck with it. This really discouraged me. However, today, I went for my initial appointment with Dr. Argotte, who will do the surgery. It went very well. I have the first 10 tests scheduled that are needed. It seems like things are moving right along. So today, I am very excited, and things look much better today. I can't believe that this is moving along as quickly as it is. I am about to enter a new phase of my life, and I thought I wouldn't be entering a new phase for a long time. So tomorrow, I go for my first couple tests. I shall let you know how things go. Thanx for reading!!!
DouglasP13

DouglasP13

2
peluche's Journal
 

Update

Well it is now 2 months and I am down 30 lbs., I am starting to do exercise and weights and I am at a standstill for the past week, hopefully I will start moving again. I hope I am not overeating cuz I want to continue with my new life, I am so excited of what I have done and I don't want to give up.
peluche

peluche

1

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