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stranger in a strange land



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Ahn young ha sae yo!! or Hello everyone :biggrin:

I'm new here and thought I'd introduce myself. I'm from the states but living abroad in South Korea. I've been overweight (with constant ups & downs) all my life and while this is not the first time I've thought of surgery, it is the first time I've seriously considered it.

The past year I've spent my time in a country where most women consider anything over 115lbs to be obese, and plastic surgery is just the norm. Needless to say, my self-esteem has taken a big hit (not that it was that high to begin with). I feel hopeless most days, but I am trying my hardest to stay positive and more recently, focused on getting the band and changing my life (for real this time).

However, I still have some fear in the back of my mind. I've been on every diet imaginable with the best intentions, but failed each time. So what if this time it's the same thing? What if I have this very serious surgery and fall back into the same old routine? I'm also thinking that perhaps these fears indicate I'm not truly ready for the surgery.

Did anyone else have similar fears before their surgery, and if so how did things work out for you?

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We all have our doubts. The surgery is no big deal. It is the commitment you must have to allow yourself and the band to do it's job. We have made excuses all of our lives to get the way we did. You need to make this choice on your own and have the will to do it. The band isn't an easy way out as some may say. You really need to work at it also. It is a life changing experience if you allow it to be.

Do your research if necessary and make up your own mind. If you have tried everything else as we all have either accept yourself as you are or get the help that the band has the capabilties to with you by it's side though.

Josephine

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Hey Stranger!

I can totally empathize with you about the Korean culture and being overweight. I am in the states, but I work for a large Korean company. They always assume that the heavier a person is, the more lazy they are.

I don't have my band yet, but my insurance has approved it and I am currently undergoing all the pretests.

This is the best site I've found that can answer most, if not all, of my questions.

At this point, nothing and nobody could talk me out of having the surgery.

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I had many, many fears go into this surgery. You have described a few of them. I think the two weeks prior to my surgery I went through every emotion known to man and woman.

What you feel is completely normal. Do these fears mean you will not be a lapband success? Not at all! Just means you are logically thinking it through.

I will tell you the band is not a magic cure for obesity but I'm sure you already know this. It takes a great deal of commitment and motivation. It is not a diet. It is a lifestyle change.

Think it through and I'm sure you will arrive at a positive conclusion.

I can tell you that food no longer has the meaning in my life that it once had and that my only regret is not embarking on this journey sooner.

Edited by happy2lose

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Thanks for the responses ladies. I think I just needed to know what I'm feeling is normal. I plan on making an appt. this week for a consultation and taking it from there. If it's meant to be, then it will be.

Best of luck to you all!! :wink2:

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Oh yes, you're totally normal. I'll give you the same advice I give to pretty much everyone else--do your research, make sure you know what you're getting into, and follow the rules. It's really as simple as that, though psychologically it's can be really hard.

As far as research goes, make sure you look at ALL WLS options before deciding upon the band. Different surgeries have different benefits and drawbacks.

Best of luck to you :wink2: This board is a great place to ask questions!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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