Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Was a loner At my support Group again!!



Recommended Posts

I'm getting alittle sick of being the lone band guy at my local support group. I just don't wanna drive 20 times as far to find people with my issues. tired of hearing about their dumps' I'm scheduled to get banded on Nov. 10th, I guess I'm lucky there's forums like these to find out issues.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have not gone to any support groups because they are armost a 2 hour drive for me and they do it on work days, so there is no way I can drive there and make it on time. I find it very helpful here on LBT. Even if you don't want to post anything or reply to other's posts, you can read.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I go to 2 different groups, each is once a month. Both have very low attendance. The one fro the surgery center usually has 6-7 people, th one formed from people on here has 3-4 people at each meeting. In both groups I am the onl man.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

the center I went through has 2 a month one downtown and one further out, I go to the one further out there are usually 2 or 3 men and the room is usually full. Our support group let's each person intro themselves and tell a little about their journey and then they usually have a speaker.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I go to my local one every now and then, when the topic is of interest or we are ahving a speaker. Otherwise I am the only guy and the only one under 45. It is a little disheartening tho. My interest in how weight loss affects menopausal symtoms is of VERY little use to me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have never been to a support group, mostly because I figure it will be like every WW meeting I attended (all 3 of them) where I was the one and only guy.

Let's face it - we have been trained that asking for help is a sign of weakness and men arent suppose to be weak. I dont ask for directions - I am not asking someone how to lose 20lbs. But... with age and the internet comes this board so we learn, grow (yeah ok).

I dont want to start a "turf" war but one of the things that bothers me is when about 2 or 3 posts into a thread on in the Men's room - a woman will post. I understand when a woman wants to start a thread to get a mans point - I have no issue with that. BUT ladies - nothing is going to shut down a thread on here faster then a woman chiming in on male body image or whatever the topic is.

Or maybe its just me ... could be I guess.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well, Excuuuuusssse ME!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well, Excuuuuusssse ME!

Funny... I assume this is a response to my post - which means I have started a turf war.

But I actually wasnt referring to you - if fact, I didnt even realize you werent a guy.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The day I offered my few words of support I did not realize I had replied in the men's room. I usually just look at "new posts" and pay little attention to the "room".

I know it must be rough to go to support groups and forums that are so estrogen rich. I guess Humming Bird would be an ok name for a guy that swings the other way. I use that name often because I live in the mountains in Colorado where we get many humming birds. sorry again.... will try my best to stay out of u guy's special little place :closedeyes:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Humming Bird is correct when you reach most post by going to new posts that you may end up in the mens room.

When I used to attend WW it was not unusual to be the only mail.

When I attended the two support groups I went two I was the only male as well.

I am fortunate in that my wife and I had the lap band put on the same date in 9/07 one hour a part, the hospital thought it was cute. Kinda hard to be cute at almost 300 lbs.

Having my wife on the same page is far better support team for me.

I also spread the word regarding the benefits of the lap band in my case: no more sleep apnea, no more diabetes, no more back pain, no more knee pains, breathing is no longer consider exercise.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I went to my first meeting last night, and I expected to be the ony guy there but was surprised to find 2 others there. yes I think its different for guys since we travel in a whole different circle than the gals.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was meaning that I was the only Lap band person. Not that I was the only guy, there were actually several men. sorry, I can see where It was misleading.....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think I may be lucky. There is about 3 - 4 other guys in my classes. The only issue is Bypass talk out weighs the Lap band talk =(

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×