Frustrated...

[MeganA 35]

Hi everyone. I just need to vent a little tonight. I'm frustrated with my band. I had the Swedish band placed Oct. 15th...at first I lost 14 pounds. I've gained back about 7 and I'm really sad. I understand that the Swedish band is flexible (vs. the molded rubber of the Lap-Band) so that may be the cause of my problems. You see, I have absolutely no restriction what so ever. I've eaten everything in sight, and then some. I went on a long weekend vacation to South Dakota and ate my way across the state and back.

My intellect tells me to be patient and that after my fill on Nov. 22nd things will be better. But, my heart is sad and I feel like a failure and if only I had more willpower that darn macaroni and cheese and chips and candy wouldn't have jumped into my mouth.

I've heard so many stories of people online being so successful even without a fill...they "made a commitment" to a healthy life...you know the stories and you may have even wrote the stories. What's wrong with me? I thought I was ready to make that commitement, but without the band's help I feel hopeless.

Can someone who's been through this give me a little story or information that I can hold onto?

I'm trying so hard to stay positive but man, it isn't easy.

Thanks, everyone...

Megan

[GeezerSue 7]

Duplicate

[GeezerSue 7]

October 15th of THIS YEAR? If so, you are supposed to be healing from the surgery, not losing weight.

Immediate and enormous weight loss is the result of RnY, not the LapBand. I hope somebody made that clear to you before you had surgery.

Your weight loss begins after the healing and after you experience restriction. This is not supposed to be immediate, and to put that kind of pressure on yourself will lead to disappointment.

Sue

By the way, I don't know you're post-op dietary restrictions, but the sticking to the diet is also about healing, not losing weight. You need to give you band time to heal in place.

[donali 57]

Hi Megan -

First of all, our problem with food has nothing to do with "lack of willpower" - this is a fallacy, and something we have all used to beat ourselves up.

The fact that I have been gleaning from posts about the Swedish band is that it is EXTREMELY difficult and frustrating to get a good, restrictive fill. The best example of this for me is Monica, from the SoCal group. She had the Inamed lapband, got to goal, had to have her band removed in an emergency surgery due to stomach torquing after a food poisoning incident, went bandless for 6 months to heal, and was rebanded a few months ago with the Swedish band. She is very, very frustrated, and is on fill 7, or something like that (she's lost track). This is an extremely experienced bandster, and she is a huge advocate of the band.

She knows, though, that it is only a matter of time before she gets to the restriction that she needs. In the meantime, she is not beating herself up - she is doing what she can on her end, and pursuing fills in a safe yet aggressive way.

Please do not blame yourself, or let yourself become discouraged. As long as your band is healthy, you WILL eventually get restriction, and those numbers will start to go down. But you WILL have to be patient, safe, and aggressive. And you WILL have to find a way to be "okay" with this process emotionally. It is never too late to get professional help with the emotional part of our eating disorders - the head is the most important part in our overall health , regardless of our weight. If we are not healthy in our "head," we will not be happy with ourselves. That's just the way it is.

Hang in there! Remember, the trip is more important than the destination! Start up those positive tapes - "I am exactly where I need to be today." "Everyday that passes gets me closer to my goals." "I love myself, and I am worthy of kindness and respect." "I am doing the best that I can." "I am becoming the person I want to be."

[ChubbleBubble 0]

Donali,

Thanks for responding to Megan because reading that has helped me too. I only have had 2 fills and am discouraged, but 7! I have looked/read her website (Monica's) and it is a very good one but I didn't know she reached her goal and then had all the problems after. (If I'm thinking of the same Monica-she is from SoCal). At any rate, I know my magic moment will come. It's just near the holidays and who doesn't want to fit into something sexy for all those parties!

[donali 57]

Hi Karen -

That probably is the same Monica - the karmalounge, right?

If you read through her journals you can read about the band removal. I haven't been to her site recently, so don't know if she's updated with the Swedish band story.

And remember, sexy is a state of mind, not a size...

[kellymoos 4]

Just wondering if someone will post Monica's website address so I can go read it. Thanks!

[shellyj 5]

http://www.thekarmalounge.com/myband.html

love your new pic kelly!

[kellymoos 4]

Thanks!! Couldn't decide if I wanted to add it or not. Finally did; it may not last too long on there though! Thanks for posting the website!! I need some encouragement...and wanted to read about someone that has made goal; so I realize it is possible!

[shellyj 5]

hey kelly and MEGAN yall may want to check these out. i have read them all but find when i am struggling if i go back to the part in their journal where they are dealing with the same issue i am it really helps!

http://www.geocities.com/robinh26/lapband.html this one is awsome! she has lost 145!

http://www.myagb.homestead.com/ another goodie...not sure how much she lost i think 100

http://www.fisherchristine.addr.com/band.html she has just lost 100 lbs as of this month!!!! in 10 months!!!

http://www.geocities.com/karlak68/ another good one who is now pregnant!

http://www.employees.org/~kirsten/ this girl has lost 85 but hasnt updated her page in a long time!!! i am sure she is down more now!

http://www.geocities.com/laylaburd/AGB/laylaslapband.html

[kellymoos 4]

I couldn't find where it said she was banded again. Did I miss it?

[shellyj 5]

i didnt see it either.

[kellymoos 4]

Another question I have is what is the difference in the band made by Inamed and the Swedish band? I have the one by Inamed.

Megan - I am not trying to take over the post you started:-)

[shellyj 5]

the difference is the inamed is 4 cc and is hard plastic

the swedish band is 11 cc and is softer has more give?

this is my understanding of the difference. i think the 11 cc band is supposed to better because there is more adjustablitly.

[MeganA 35]

I just want to thank everyone who responded to my post. I am feeling much better after getting a handle on my emotional eating and figuring out some things in my head. I also think I have PMS so that can explain some of my chaotic feelings.

I think a lot of my frustration stems from the fact that, before I got involved in any of this surgery stuff, I was content with my body. I knew it wasn't healthy to live at my weight, but I wouldn't allow myself to say all those negative things. I need some new clothes because in the months before surgery I had gained some weight (imagine that!) and now I have only a few ugly, frumpy things to wear. I don't want to buy any more clothes because I only will have to loose about 20 to fit into the stuff I already have. Since I've had surgery, I get so angry that I don't have anything to wear. I'm just not going to let it get me down anymore.

Thanks again for everyone's kind words. Donali- a special thanks to you. I have been working on replacing those negative tapes with some new ones. I think it's working :-)

Take care, everyone...

Megan