Introduction

[sberrys 0]

I have finally made the decision to have the lap band surgery (at least I think I have, it's a tough decision for me). I'm about 200 lbs over weight and 26 years old. I've been over weight since I was a little girl and put on the majority of it after I had back surgery for curvature of the spine at age 14.

I don't consider myself to be an emotional eater, but I do love food and I think I just let myself enjoy it too much. I rarely snack between meals, skip Breakfast, eat late, drink too much sugary drinks, and do all the things they tell you not to do and I am pretty much completely sedentary. After I get off work from a day of sitting in front of a computer, I get in the bed and veg out the rest of the night in front of the TV and my laptop. I want to have a more active life style and be in pain less but have never been able to commit to a healthy life style for longer than a month or two and a 20 lb weight loss. I feel like I live on dose after dose of tylenol and it really doesn't do enough for me all the time.

I think my biggest fear of having the band is that I will never be able to enjoy eating again. I can stand a year or two of not being able to eat a lot but the idea of never being able to go to a restaurant and enjoying at least a small portion of the appetizer, salad, and my entree again really bothers me. Not being able to drink during meals would be really tough for me as well.

I want to have kids before I get too much older and I feel that I can't be as good a mother as I'd want to be in my current shape. I can't fit on rides at Disney or do any physically active activities, let alone walk for long in the mall without taking a break on a bench. The idea of not being able to do those types of things with my future children is really sad.

My husband is very overweight as well and has very high blood pressure at age 26 and we are a bad influence on each other as far as our eating habits go - really I'm the worst bad influence.

I've thought about the band for the past 8 years but have been unable to come to terms with the fact that a life style change is needed some how some way, be it surgery or whatever. My mother and both her sisters have had gastric bypass with good results but I also know people who have had life threatening complications from it so I want to take the less invasive route with the lap band. It scares me to watch my mom get sick after almost every meal when she only ate like a 10th of what other people ate. I can't imagine being like that forever, it's one of my biggest fears with surgery. You could say I was doomed from birth with genes from a family full of obese people but what it boils down to is the fact that I haven't done anything about it all these years and now I find myself in pain all the time and not too many years off from a wheelchair and I'm only 26.

I'm currently working a temporary federal job with great health insurance but my job may end in November or December so I'm hoping and praying that I haven't waited too long to look in to lap band surgery. I could extend it out a few months after the job ends with COBRA but not sure how long I could afford it.

SO, sorry for the long post but I needed to get some of this off my chest and hopefully I will find the support of others who have walked this path and come out the other side as happier and healthier individuals.

[babyka16 0]

hi there!!! i know just how you feel and go through each and every day! you came to the right place there is so much info here. im going to meet with a surgeon on monday to see if i can have the lapband. as far as i know with the lapband it is going to be a big big change in your life... but a good one. the first few weeks and a few weeks after i know that you wont be able to eat much just liquids and them mushies and then you can start eating some food from there but after that you should be able to eat food. you have to make the right food choices but you know i dont think eating a bite of cake or going out to eat with fam and friends is going to hurt. you just really have to watch what you eat and know when you are full. i would ask your doc about it and go from there. there is allot of info out there, trust me your not alone on how you feel. i wish you the best of luck!!!! and welcome to Lapbandtalk!!!!!

[bugsbuni70 1]

Hi and welcome to the forum . I was just banded on July 20th this week. I know I made the right choice.:cool2:

[Headhunter 6]

Hi, Sberrys;

Welcome to the forum!

You gave us a lot of good information on your predicament; you’ll find a lot of widely varying opinions here. You’ll also get a lot of facts as well, and sometimes it’s difficult to know which is which.

Myself, I’ve had both the Lap Band and the Gastric Bypass. The Bypass was the one that worked for me. I’ve had kind of a unique experience on my road to becoming slim and healthy. During the process, I learned an enormous amount about myself, the various surgeries, the medical system, the legal system, the insurance system, and human nature. I try to give benefit of my experience to people in your position who are just beginning their process.

A few things about your situation caught me eye, and I’d like to comment on them.

The first thing I’d like to say is to look at ALL your options thoroughly, and don’t become “married” to any particular procedure or process while you are investigating. You will find that people in this forum (and most of the other forums) will almost ALWAYS tell you to have the surgery that THEY had, because it worked for THEM. That is something that you want to avoid. The different surgeries are meant for different people, different body types, and different personalities. I had the Lap Band, and it didn’t work for me. As I said, my situation was a little out of the ordinary, but the bottom line is that it was NOT the right surgery for me. The Bypass WAS.

I’d like to point out the misconception that the entire Weight Loss Surgery issue is that of a big WLS “Smorgasbord”, and that all you have to do is simply pick the one that tickles your fancy.

That is incorrect.

They are ALL different, and they are meant for different types of people and bodies.

They ALL work (to varying degrees)…..but their long-term (and short-term) efficacy is dependant on some very individual elements. You really need to take the time and the effort to ascertain which WLS is right for you.

Some people need restriction, which is what the Band and the Sleeve offer. Some people need Malabsorbtion, which is the primary mechanism present in the Gastric Bypass. Some need a combination. If you are one of those who crave sweets, who puts on 3 pounds by breathing in the air in a bakery, then you will most likely need the Malabsorbtion element that Gastric Bypass offers. This is also true if you really don’t feel like you eat THAT much, but you continue you put on weight. If you simply eat too much and self discipline is the problem, then the Sleeve or the Lap Band might be the ticket. But, you really have to study the various methods in DETAIL, and be HONEST with yourself about what kind of eating disorder you have.

You mentioned that you have family that had the Bypass, and that it was successful for them. You also stated that your Mother becomes ill after eating, and she had the Bypass. I have a couple of thoughts about that. First, if you have close family that have been successful with the Bypass, that MIGHT indicate a genetic disposition to a particular eating dysfunction that would be successfully treated with the Bypass. On that basis, I would certainly keep the Bypass as a very viable option. However, you DID mention that your Mother had some problems after eating. Has she had those problems looked into by her Doctor/surgeon? Pain after eating post-bypass is NOT normal, and it could indicate a stricture or an ulcer….both of them are easily treatable. MOST problems (the very vast majority, in fact) with the Bypass ARE treatable, or they are related directly to patient behavior – something the patient is doing or NOT doing. So, I would NOT rule out the Bypass as an option. It has worked well for nearly half a century for many, many people, and if it FITS you, it should be considered.

The SECRET is having the RIGHT procedure performed. And, finding out which one is right for YOU is sometimes complicated, and it takes a while. Don’t try and get the answer to this TOO quickly. You didn’t become overweight overnight, so don’t try and solve the problem too rapidly, and make a mistake in the process.

One thing that might be of help to you is the use of a Psychotherapist that specializes in Bariatric Disorders and Weight Issues. They can very often help you sort out the issues that have brought you to the point of needing Weight Loss Surgery. They can help you find out the KIND of eater you are, and in the process help you arrive at the proper surgical solution to the problem. I would caution you, though; all Psychotherapists are NOT alike, you MUST make sure that the one you choose has a very well-defined and EXPERIENCED practice in Bariatric disorders.

One other piece of advice I would give you is to CHOOSE YOUR SURGEON CAREFULLY. I made the mistake of choosing a hack for a Lap-Band surgeon, and it caused me (and my family) enormous suffering for a number of years. In spite of his ineptitude, the Lap band was STILL the wrong choice for me, and when I ultimately found an excellent surgeon, and chose the RIGHT surgery, everything turned out fine.

So, to summarize, here’s what I would suggest that you do:

* Take your TIME to make your decision. Take a couple of months, you have plenty of time.

* Do a LOT of research on ALL of your options.

* Get some Psychotherapy from a QUALIFIED and EXPERIENCED Bariatric Therapist.

* Talk to LOTS of people who had the surgeries you are considering….but don’t let them “sell” you on the surgery that THEY had just because THEY were successful with it….it might not be right for YOU.

* Ask questions of people who were UNSUCCESSFUL with the surgeries that THEY chose. Find out WHY they thought that they failed.

* Go to a bunch of seminars that Surgeons put on to provide information on the surgeries that they perform…but be warned: these “seminars” are, in reality, SALES PRESENTATIONS. Don’t allow yourself to be “sold”.

And when you have done all of the above….., Do it AGAIN. This is a life-changing procedure that you are contemplating….make sure that you do it right the FIRST time. You don’t want to have to go through surgery multiple times, as I did.

Hopefully, all of that will give to something to consider as you begin this process. I wish you the very best of luck, and I look forward to hearing about your decision, plans, and I look forward even MORE to hearing about your eventual SUCCESS and your new life….because it IS out there….it’s up to you to go out make it happen!:cool2:

Best regards,

HH

[RestlessMonkey 7]

Just wanted to tell you that for some of us, no food is off limits. Bless my surgeon! :cool2: He said his goal is for his patients to be able to eat ANYTHING in small portions and many of them attain that goal. I can eat white bread, dry chicken breast, steak, fajitas, you name it.

In fact today for lunch I had a cup of lemon chicken and rice. A splurge, delicious. And 1 cup was plenty. Before I would've had WAY more than that, and egg rolls, and 3 fortune Cookies and probably some wontons. :smile: (awful but true!)

It's easy to be more active when you feel better, look better, fit INTO the sports bras (does it seem like they just make them for women who do NOT need to wear them? LOL) and so on.

HH is right...research. Personally I LOVE the band.

Good for you doing something NOW when you're young. Don't let your life whiz by you while you sit in bed with the tv and your lap top.

[Headhunter 6]

Don't let your life whiz by you while you sit in bed with the tv and your lap top.

No, what you need to do is get your internet service set up so that you can watch tv ON your laptop.....that eliminates the clutter in the bed.....:cool2:

HH

[RestlessMonkey 7]

LOL I'm a multimedia Monkey. :cool2: But I do make myself move and "earn" the downtime now. Mostly. :smile:

[Grandma26 1]

Hi and welcome!

Congratulations for making it this far!! As I read parts of your story I thouht OMG she is writing about me!!!

I understand your feelings about not being able to eat, but I want to let you know...I am only 4 weeks post-op and on the soft solid food stage, last night I went out to our monthly girls night out book club group dinner and I was able to enjoy my dinner just like the rest of the group. I didn't have the appetizer or salad because I am not at that stage yet, but I was able to choose a dinner that fit within my food allowances, I had 2 asian grilled shrimp, a small amount of garilic potatoes and grilled veggies. I am only allowed 1/2 cup but I was full and I don't have any restriction yet.

I don't want you to think you won't be able to enjoy food anymore because you will, you just won't feel the need to eat every bit of food. (God I hear my mother's voice telling me that I better clean my plate because there are children starving in other countries)!!!

Good Luck!!

[lessofme2 0]

I had the lapband myself and I love it.My daughter had the gastric bypass. Good luck with your decision. One thing though with the lapband you can have most anything, just watch what you chose to eat.

[sberrys 0]

Just wanted to say thank you all for your support. My info session is scheduled for next Tuesday and I'm excited about it!