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Very excited, but need help



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Hi everybody and thanks for all the helpful information and encouragement from everybody. I'm new and this is my first post. I'm starting my 6 month diet this month, see my PCP on Mon. 7/13/09 for my first weigh in :ohmy:, and I can't wait as I'm scheduled to see my surgeon for the 1st time on 8/12/09 :confused:. My family is very supported especially my mom and sister as they know I've struggled with my weight most of my life. Like everyone else here have been on numerous diets and weight loss plans and you take it off but just end up putting the weight back on plus. The problem I having is that I work for my in-laws. Don't get me wrong I like my job but I'm having a hard time tellling my mother-in-law about my decision to have the band done. I know she will have concerns but I've done a lot of research over the last few months and I've just decided that I need this help with my weight. Can anybody give me help on how to break this awesome news to her? Thanks for reading this and letting me go on.

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Good topic! I go for my psych consult in a few weeks and I have not told my own family yet! My husband is very supportive about it but I have not told my own mother because I don't want to deal with the possibility that she will not support me. I am excited too and don't want the "buzz kill." Love to hear what others have done in this situation. Thank you Jodi!

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If you are thinking she'll be worried about you, tell her you've thoroughly researched it and have her go to a seminar with you! (You'll have time since you have to diet for 6 months, and they are free). Usually the seminar goes a LONG way to allaying everyone's fears.

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Do you generally have to do the 6 month diet even if you have submitted proof to your insurance that you have had medically supervised diets in your past? Thank you for your reply!

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That depends on your insurance and their rules. Not all require that; the person who handles insurance claims at your surgeon's office may be able to help you with that! :confused:

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I have found just about everyone to be supportive, even the one friend that I was worried about. She always seems to judge everything that I do. It doesn't help that she thinks of herself as overweight and she isn't even overweight by her BMI!!

I finally told her... she said "I thought you didn't want to do weight loss surgery", I said.. "I changed my mind after talking to the doctors, etc.". After a couple of other "judgement" type comments I basically cut her off and said "Mary, I'm looking for support here"...while looking at her straight in the eye. She got it.. and is now behind me. I'm sure there will be some sort of judgement comment coming again, but I know it is just the way she is...

One thing I read that made sense to me was "why would anyone want to not help you get and use the tool you needed to reach your goals and be healthy"? I will use that if I have to... keeping it in the back pocket! :confused:

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Thanks everybody for your comments. I guess I just have to bit the bullet and tell her and let the chips lie where they fall. I knew she cares but sometimes you just don't want to deal with it. Thanks again.

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Hi Delean, that sounds like a good idea. Would love to do that for you. Maybe we could do this together. Ha ha. I'm thinking about just waiting until I go to my surgeon in Aug. to tell her in a note, chicken's way out, of why I need the day off from work as I work for my in-laws. Maybe that is why I think it might be harder because of the time being off.

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If you're close and you just send her a note that may be very hurtful to her. If not, who cares? LOL

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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