Am I REALLY Getting This Done?!?

[VmpSlayr 0]

Holy Cow! I never, ever thought I would consider physically altering my body in an attempt to lose weight! The date's been set, I'm beginning my pre-pre-op liquid diet, and it's all I'm thinking about.

Does anyone else have times when they feel like they've failed or are ashamed of themselves because they've not been able to lose weight in a "traditional" way? I've told very, very, few people about the surgery primarly because I've been up and down so many times in my life that I'm humiliated to tell anyone that I've actually decided to have SURGERY because I haven't been able to lose weight and keep it off. At 333 pounds, there's so much I can't do that other people take for granted (i.e., sitting comfortably at a ball game, restaurant, etc., tying one's shoes, bending over to pick up something that's been dropped) that I just can't stand it anymore.

I'm excited and at the same time I'm scared and at the same time I'm petrified that I'll fail and be this size for the rest of my life (and just keep getting bigger).

I'm hoping to hear from others that struggle with the same feelings and others that have conquered their fears and have succeeded and are doing well.

Thanks for listening.

[chantel03 0]

lol. :lol:i thought i was the only one with a shoe tieing problem.

i always make my husband tie them. or i just wear flip flops.lol

thats defiently going to be one of my NSV 's......

[monica28 0]

I feel the same way and i am scared of having the surgery.

[TopTier 0]

Please don't think of this as having "failed" at something. Because you haven't. You have "succeeded" in finding the right tool to help you take your life back.

Keep in mind, this isn't a magic bullet and it will still require you to do work. So it's not like you're taking an "easy way out," as some people mistakenly refer to it.

This is a very big step that requires a lot of courage and dedication.

But you can do it, and so can you, Monica, because you know you are worth it and you know you have the strength and dedication to do what's right for you!

It's hard living with morbid obesity. Using this tool to reverse your obesity is an awesome opportunity!

Stay strong and continue to believe in yourself! We do. Believe in you!

[absolutstyle 0]

Oh my gosh! I was brought here by fate to see your post! I am your age and exactly your weight and I feel like I was reading a post that I could have very well posted myself.

I am a little behind you in the process however. I have just recently made my mind up that I am going to have this done. I just need to decide where, how I am going to pay for it and exactly when.

I also need some encouragement and assurance that it will all be ok, if you know what I mean. I know this is asking alot from you since you really need to focus on yourself right now, but I would love to follow your procedure and progress step by step. I would love to corespond with you. I am a great listener and a great friend to have :smile:

I wish you all the luck in the world and know that you will be blessed with your decission. I'd love to exchange emails and keep in touch with you thru our journeys.

[rmanns00 0]

Your feelings are so justified and normal. I think we have all had those thoughts at one time or another. I am 42 years old and have also failed at all diet attempts. I would lose 20 pounds then gain it back. I need to lose about 80lbs though. I weigh exatly what I weighed back in 1988. I had many reservations about surgery I think that is why i am having the lapband vs gastric bypass, less invasive. My take on it is this. I am not a vain person and I usually try everything else first before seeking help, however due to health reasons and wanting to avoid the weight related illness here we are. I had inertility issues but desperately wanted children. It took me 15 years to get pregnant with all sorts of procedures, injections, medications if I had not pursued that with medical assistance I would not have 2 children now. I look at the LB the same way i tired it my way, now I need help a tool. And to all of those people whom you are worried about their opinion until they come over and tie your shoes for you then they need to be more supportive.

[lindsayb 0]

I definitely feel the same way. It took me several months to decide to have surgery, because I kept feeling like I was a failure because I couldn't lose the weight on my own. I'd always been able to in the past, but this time the weight I want to lose is 4 times the amount I have ever put on.

The people on this site seem to be really encouraging, and that's so nice to hear.

My biggest fear now is the pain that will come after surgery (6/5/09). I hadn't realized how severe it could be, and now I'm getting worried.

But I have come to realize that having this surgery is not the easy way out (from what I've heard other bandsters say) and it is deciding to take care of yourself above everyone else (big problem for me), and that it is not selfish (a huge realization in pre-op!).

Hopefully we can all be in this together!!!

[VmpSlayr 0]

I am SO thankful that I decided to join this on-line support community because now I don't feel so alone! Thank you to everyone that posted and offered encouragement.

My spouse is very supportive but dosen't really "get in" in terms of the myriad of emotions that seem to run wild in my head and although the one close friend I've told about the surgery is also encouraging, it's VERY comforting to "talk" to people who are in my shoes and going through the same thing.

So, thanks... I can't wait to get to know more of you.

[MissK 0]

Hi VmpSlayr!

First and foremost, just LOVE your name!

I am new here as well, just joined today,and I completely understand where you are coming from. When I made the final decision to book in for the operation and rang my family to let them know that it was full-steam ahead, I broke down in tears for similar reasons as you.

As I move closer to my banding date, I am becoming less emotional about that side of it. I initially wanted to keep it a secret but I've made the decision to be an open book. I don't wear a sign around my neck, but I don't hide it either. My close friends and family know, my boss knows and some close work colleagues. When I am off work for 2 weeks for surgery, most people will know why and I am okay with that. I figure the more people that know, the more determined I will be to make this work because of the number of people that will be disappointed if I don't.

It will also be nice not to have to 'make excuses' as to why I'm only eating small portions, or not having cake, etc... I can simply say "sorry, I can't because of the band" and they will already KNOW what I am on about.

Best wishes to you!

MissK x x

[Sarah.R 2]

I think everyone kind of goes through the exact same thinking process of "oh my god, I can't believe it's gotten to this and I've had to have surgery to loose the weight" But honestly it's great that we are being so proactive about this entire thing, I have about 120lbs to loose and I know that if I did it by myself I would gain it back plus another 60lbs and I didn't want that, I knew I wouldn't be able to maintain, this band helps us keep the weight off. It's not a quick fix, we have to work just as hard as a normal person that goes to the gym to loose weight but we have an advantage - If we gain weight all we do is get a fill. I had the band done on the 12th this month and I've definitely gone through periods where I've thought "can I ever really do this?" I actually came out of the operating theatre and told my mum that I hated it and I wanted it out - It was the pain talking obviously lol. But just think of the end result - You're going to be happier, healthier and overall it will be the best possible thing for you (hopefully.) Good luck =)