Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Emotional eating help



Recommended Posts

I am probably going to have the surgery mid-April and I'm still struggling with the thought of losing my relationship with food. I have dealt with all the issues with my emotional eating in therapy over the past few years. I know my triggers. I know why I do it. I don't want to live this way anymore, but somehow I still feel afraid of losing it. I guess it's been such a big part of my life for so long that the thought of it being gone is scary. I know it's killing me and I know the dependence on food has been a bad thing, but it's still hard to face the fact that it will no longer be an option. Plus I am so afraid of failing! Has anyone else felt this way?

If anyone has any thoughts on this, I would be very appreciative if you would share them with me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey there... Yes i know exactly what you are talking about. I love food, I love going out to eat and I also eat under emotional stress. Im a single Mom with a 6 year old, I work with a bunch of men that talk to you like your a man, with a very stressfull job. I go to school practically full-time also.

I was banded on 3/11 and have been doing well. Yes, I miss my Quesadias from Chili's,lol but i just keep looking to the future and tell my self how much better I am going to feel and look. I love positive attention and when I lose weight, I use that praise as a form of motivation.

It was the best decision I made, regardless of the pain and the shakes,lol, its worth it!!

Good luck with your journey and make sure you surround yourself with POSITIVE people that will support you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi there,

I've been going through the same issues. I'm in the waiting for insurance stage right now, and I admit that as each day gets closer my anxiety tends to rise a bit. I've talked to the doctor, to the psychologist, to friends.

I've been trying to think of others things to occupy my time when I'm in my bored stages or emotional stages or stressed stages. I'm trying to look into classes to take, a hobby to take up, a kickboxing class to take up. I know that the best thing for me is knowing that I have a place like this to come to and find others that feel the same way I do.

Let's be friends, you can turn to me when you feel you can't go another day.

Good LUCK!!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am a recovering emotional eater. I think the fear is harder to deal with before surgery. What should do now, before surgery, is start working on new things to replace the emotional eating. Starting to work on new habits now, will help you so much later. Even if it means going back to the therapist to work on new ways to deal with the emotions. Every day is a work in progress, a new start. Good luck to you!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was banded January 19 and was very worried about emotional eating. So far I've been doing OK. I've found other ways to treat myself - I had my very first pedicure Thursday and shopping for clothes both in person and on line is a new passion. And I'm not going to say I haven't cheated. I had a Chai High smoothie from Intajuice this afternoon. But I do live in fear. I know the eating thing is out there, lurking, waiting to strike when my life really goes ka-blooey ... I just hope my alternative coping mechanisms are strong by then.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you so much for your comments and support. It really helps to know I'm not doing this alone.

Michelle, I'm so glad to hear you're happy with your decision. I can only imagine how difficult this must be with such a tough schedule. It's encouraging to know you can do it and succeed.

Laya, you're right I need to figure out a hobby now. Try something different. Let's keep in touch to get through this.

Slim-n-thin, thank you for your thoughts. I think therapy is a good route to go to get through this hectic time.

Footballmom, I know that it's there lurking too and it scares the heck out of me. But I figure I know that the new lifestyle will be hard but living an obese life is hard too. I just gotta prepare for the tough times the way you are. And I gotta figure out a different way to reward myself too!

I appreciate the feedback from everyone and I wish you well on your journeys.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am on my four day of pre-op diet and i am struggling. I am getting anxious about losing my idol, my confidant, my best friend-food! I am afraid that if I can't stick to the pre-op diet, how will i stick to eating right after banded? I am a self pay and you would think that would be motivation enough. I think i am self sabotaging. I am going to work with my counselor and my 12 step group but most imortantly, i am going to try to remember to pray my way through each time i am feeling driven to eat. THanks for letting me share. My surgery date is 4/3 and the diet is for my liver. I was not given an amount that needed to be lost before the surgery. I am so excited but so afraid of the change.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I couldn't have said it better. It is scary to lose that comfort. I've relied on it for so long. I am a self-pay too and I'm scared it won't be enough. The reason to abstain and to not use food is to take care of myself. I am gonna have to let myself be uncomfortable and feel all the feelings I've been stuffing down with food. That is pretty terrifying just to think of that way.

I feel just the way you do - so excited and yet so scared. I know we can do this - we have to for our health.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have the same concerns. I just stay focused on what I will be gaining, not what I am giving up. Because...despite all the comfort I took in food, that is what got me into this predicament in the first place.

Shaun

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

what a great life long question you pose.

something odd happened to me when i got my surgery date. i stopped eating. just like that. that day. at 2pm. it was as a switch went off in my head.

psychologically, i suffer from the "i'm either ON a diet or i'm OFF a diet" syndrome. very bad mentality for those occasional slip ups. have enough of them and you're OFF more than you are on.

currently, i am on day 12 pre op with surgery april 1st and i haven't had a single bite of food. the will power is astonishing. not sustainable which is why i'm having this done, but astonishing nonetheless.

the gradual process of eating again will be taken seriously and with extreme caution. this might be the one chance i get to reintroduce myself to food in a whole new way.

i think this is a process for a reason. i'm akming it mine!

here's to doing it right. finally.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I couldn't have said it better. It is scary to lose that comfort. I've relied on it for so long. I am a self-pay too and I'm scared it won't be enough. The reason to abstain and to not use food is to take care of myself. I am gonna have to let myself be uncomfortable and feel all the feelings I've been stuffing down with food. That is pretty terrifying just to think of that way.

I feel just the way you do - so excited and yet so scared. I know we can do this - we have to for our health.

Oh this is so me also. I am not booked yet but going to get Sleeve soon I hope. I am self pay also so doing homework.

I sure hope for some help to not care to eat like now home all weekend and that's all I do. Eat when sad, happy , whatever

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am probably going to have the surgery mid-April and I'm still struggling with the thought of losing my relationship with food. I have dealt with all the issues with my emotional eating in therapy over the past few years. I know my triggers. I know why I do it. I don't want to live this way anymore, but somehow I still feel afraid of losing it. I guess it's been such a big part of my life for so long that the thought of it being gone is scary. I know it's killing me and I know the dependence on food has been a bad thing, but it's still hard to face the fact that it will no longer be an option. Plus I am so afraid of failing! Has anyone else felt this way?

If anyone has any thoughts on this, I would be very appreciative if you would share them with me.

Yes..i have been there... I was told that once i get to the proper restriction i would not be able to eat that many carbs.. which i love mac & cheese, breads etc... for the first 6mths i was like ahhhhh i can still eat it.. but now hell no!! the most i can tolerate is like 1-spoon of mac and cheese and no breads at all... you will get there where you will feel like you have lost your best friend but this friend i don't mind being without....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you for all your comments. It is very helpful to know I'm not alone in this and to see ones who have this same issue who are making this a success.

I'm still scared and probably always will be but I'm ready to work hard to get thru it.

Take care!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×