Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Family histrory of obesity, need advice



Recommended Posts

This is my first post, so please be easy on me.

I'm 24 years old and am 190 pounds. Most members on both sides of my family are obese and have struggled with their weight since adolescence. I was thin until around 16 and have gradually gained more and more weight over the years.

I fight really hard to maintain a weight of 190 pounds. REALLY hard. I don't eat fast food, don't drink soda, exercise and somehow I still manage to slowly but surely gain weight. I don't eat or drink anymore than any of my friends. I've had blood tests and there's nothing wrong with my thyroid and no physical explanation for this. The only explanation I can find is in my genes.

So, my question is, do I get a lap band now? I understand how difficult it can be. I've had 4 direct family members get them and they have had awesome results. It just seems inevitable that my weight will continue to grow. I'm so frustrated and discouraged. I'm only 24 and my metabolism is just going to continue to slow. I feel like I'm being silly with only being 50ish pounds overweight, but I don't want to struggle my whole life.

Is there anyone in this forum who has a similar story? Anyone who only needed to lose 50-75 pounds to be in their target weight? How did you guys reach your conclusions to do it? I did a forum search and couldn't come up with anything.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi, your story sounds like mine. Just about everyone in my family has a weight problem. I never was skinny, but I managed to keep the weight off when I was a teenager. But it was very hard. I hardly ate at all. My mother even thought I had an eating disorder at one time. But even at that time, I still wasn't what you would call skinny. I was around a size 7. But when I turned 18, I started gaining. I could no longer keep it off. I don't know if it was depression or what, but I slowly gained up to 260 pounds by the time I was 25. I also exercised and didn't eat anymore that anyone else. I spent the rest of my 20s being obese. So when I turned 30, I told myself I wasn't going to waste my 30s being obese as well. So my advice to you is, if you are really serious, and if you can afford it, get it now. It isn't impossibe, but it is very unlikely that you will be able to keep the weight off as you get older. Getting it now will save you from wasting years like I did. Good luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know you say you don't eat anymore than anyone else, and I believe you. My 16 year old daughter with the perfect figure routinely ate twice what I did, but I was a blimp. What you should do, is begin tracking what and how much you eat and drink. Be honest. Use dailyplate.com or fitday.com to do it. Take a look at your calorie count for the day and where your calories are coming from. If you are consuming under 2000 calories a day already, I don't know if the lapband will help you.

I did not eat more than anyone else, and much less than most, but now I realize I was consuming 2500-3000 each day. Not too much for an average male, but too much for a bascially moderately sedentary female. With my band I consume 1200-1500 calories per day. I am slowly losing 1-2 lbs per week. Yes, I could have done this without the band, but I would have been difficult to sustain the weight loss. I think I will have a better time keeping it off.

If you find that you are consuming over 2000 calories per day, then this could be a tool for you to use. Believe me when I tell you 2000 calories per day is not a lot of food. I belive most people consume more than that. Good luck. Please let me know what you find out if you decide to track your food and drinks. It is an eye opener, I promise. My daughter has decided that if she starts gaining, her 600 calorie frappacinos will be the first thing to go!!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Your story reminds me a lot of mine also. I am 22 years old and ALL of my family members are over weight. I was not brought up with correct eating habbits and I believe that I made a lot of bad food choices that got me where I am today. With that said, I did struggle with the decission to get the band, mostly because I am so young. I am not sure if I could do it long term or not with out the band, but I do know that I am making the right decission for me. I need to loose 74 more pounds to get to 130 and to me that is a huge goal and I am very thankful that I have the oppertunity to make it happen! My advice is do it now, don't wait until your 30 or 40 and look back and wish you had done it sooner.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you for your responses.

My age is what scares me, but my mom (who was banded about a year ago) told me that she doesn't want me to have to struggle my whole life like she did.

It seems silly to do anything to a healthy body that isn't necessary, but I guess if I continue on this path my body won't remain healthy. My mom's process has been SO easy. She hasn't had a single issue. I'm just afraid I won't be so lucky!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

i definitely understand where you are coming from. im 33 and have spent most of my life fighting my weight. my highest weight was 225. and my goal is 150. my family history played a major role in my decision to get the band, my mother died morbidly obese at the age of 52. my older sister died from a heart attack 2 weeks after her 40th birthday. ive spent the last few years struggling with my weight terrified of ending up like my mom an my sister. my other siblings are ovewrweight as wekk. im actually the smallest adult in my family.

for me it was a decision based more on the weight i could end up as opposed to the weight i was currently at. it is a hard decision but so far its a decision im very happy with. i dont expect to be thin over night but even in the 4 weeks since my band was placed i already feel so much better. not just physically but mentally as well

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

OMG this reminds so much of me. Most of my family is obese and we don't eat more than other families. Some people say weight has nothing to do with your genes but I believe it does. I'm only sixteen and I have been obese my whole life. My parents and brothers are also big but I'm pretty sure I'm the heaviest in the house. Just this past summer I weighed 212 now I weigh about 273, no matter what I try I continue to gain so this why I am going to have the lap band done. I don't want to be obese my whole life I want to be healthy and be able to enjoy growing up.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×