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Help...my husband doesn't understand.



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I need help. I just had my second fill and for the first time I have restriction. I am starting to lose weight again but I am not able to eat like I was. I am happy with this but my husband is not. He seems to get upset when I can't eat regular food, we just got back from vacation and I must say, I threw up more than I ate. It has only been 9 days since my second fill and I am still getting use to this restriction. I am eating Soups and salads and Protein bars. I am having trouble with meat though and that really bothers him. Should I be worried about having trouble with meat? ? As I lose weight won't the band loosen again?? Thanks for listening.

Cindy

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Your husband aside, I guess it just depends. In my surgeon's office is a chart about the "green zone" (what's called the sweet spot on this board) and it's what my surgeon has, from day ONE, told me to aim for...that is the ability to eat ANYTHING but in much smaller portions. You should be able to eat meat as long as you cut it in small bites and chew it well. IF you are doing that...small bites (dime sized or so) chewed to mush (for me that's about 40 chews..yes I've counted, had to do something while I was chewing!) and still can't eat any chicken or beef or pork, then yes you are too tight.

The point of the band is Portion Control, not restricting food groups. Eating like you are, you're not likely to be getting adequate Protein in your diet, and life isn't lived on Protein Bars.

If you are following the rules scrupulously and can only eat soft "slider" foods as you describe, I'd suggest you call your surgeon's office on Monday and discuss with him. While some people LIKE the tight restriction you have, it can be dangerous (GERD for example) and isn't really a healthy way to eat long term. Your surgeon can direct you better than I can, or your husband, or anyone here! :smile: And yes as you lose it should loosen a little,. but that can take a while. You don't want to let where you are now go on too long.

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...and still can't eat any chicken or beef or pork...

Restless, I am getting close to this point as well. Pork, forget about it. And for sure chicken breast has been giving me a fit. Actually vomited on the last chicken breast I had, which was last week. So what is left, fish? :smile:

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Does he say what, exactly, he's upset about? That it's affecting him somehow?

He is just overly worried, I think. I have been able to keep some things down, I did have some shrimp on vacation , but it just seems if the meat has to be chewed alot it doesn't get any smaller (for example, steak, pork of any kind and chicken that is not shredded already.) He is just now seeing me be restricted and is being overly worried. I have always been told that as long as I can get Fluid down and eat some food that it is not too tight. I don't know what to believe now?

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I couldn't eat any Protein after my last fill until I realized I wasn't chewing it well, and my bites were too big. I've heard some use baby spoons...that's too cutesy for me but I do take a bite, then half it with my fork or spoon, and THEN put it in my chubby little mouth, and that helps a lot. If you really can't eat most Protein regardless of methodology, though, I'd say ask your surgeon. For me, that's too tight.

I went into this expecting to lose 1-2 pounds a week (knew it would take me a couple years to get where I was going) and expected to be able to eat anything. That was what I wanted, so that's what I am aiming for (and that's what I have right now) BUT we're all different; I personally couldn't live on only fish. For one thing, we're land locked and it isn't fresh LOL

I guess if you want to restrict food groups, the band will work for that, but to me that's more punitive than helpful or healthy. (like the old diets where you ate only cabbage or drank liquid Protein etc)

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I have always been told that as long as I can get Fluid down and eat some food that it is not too tight. I don't know what to believe now?

Ultimately, do what your surgeon tells you...follow HIS advice (not nutritionist, but the surgeon) However here's a link to the official lap band web site describing the intent of "the green zone". Maybe that will help you figure it out:

Lapband.com - LAP-BAND® System Adjustments - Weight Loss Management

That's the "poster" all over my doc's office...the goal we all aim for.

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Ultimately, do what your surgeon tells you...follow HIS advice (not nutritionist, but the surgeon) However here's a link to the official lap band web site describing the intent of "the green zone". Maybe that will help you figure it out:

Lapband.com - LAP-BAND® System Adjustments - Weight Loss Management

That's the "poster" all over my doc's office...the goal we all aidm for.

Thanks for all of your helpful advice. I am going to step back and see if what my real problem is taking too big of a bite and not chewing correctly. It is so hard to stop doing something that you have been doing all of my life. I have always been a fast eater, shoveling every bite in. I will try the smaller bites and counting to 40 as I chew. Thanks again for all your advice.:smile:

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Thanks for all of your helpful advice. I am going to step back and see if what my real problem is taking too big of a bite and not chewing correctly. It is so hard to stop doing something that you have been doing all of my life. I have always been a fast eater, shoveling every bite in. I will try the smaller bites and counting to 40 as I chew. Thanks again for all your advice.:smile:

I know I'm STILL having this problem. Last time I went in for a fill (about a week-and-a-half ago), his questionnaire asked if I had PBed, and I said yes, but I considered it operator error. He liked that, lol. Though I eat slowER, I am probably still eating too fast, especially for my new restriction, and not chewing as thoroughly as I could be. However, I realize there will be certain foods (like reheated pork for sure) that I won't be able to have because I HAVE cut that into tiny pieces and chewed to a pulp and it still gets stuck.

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I so understand where you are coming from Beth. I can't reheat meat at all. I tried that. It did NOT work. I can't eat pork, but not because it won't go down. I don't know if I didn't chew it well enough, but it sat in my pouch too long. I had the most awful heartburn after eating it.

I have found that I can still enjoy steak as long as I stop to think about the bite BEFORE I get it into my mouth. If I don't stop, I will shovel it in like before. The difference being, it won't go anywhere. Not a great feeling at all. It does take some time to get used to each level of restriction. Like RestlessMonkey said, talk it over with your doctor. I, for one, don't want to be so restricted that I can't eat anything but fish. I like fish, but I don't want to grow gills anytime soon. Good luck!

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My doctors nutricianist said chicken can cause problems. She did say fish was the most torable meat. I haven't had a fill yet...just banded 3/9/09, but I really can't wait. I am hungry now, and it is hard as heck to ignore that. Surgery restriction didn't last long for me. Hope this tip helped. At the support group last week, another girl had the same problem with meat.

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chicken is a very evil meat. The crock-pot makes it do-able, though. Crock pots make most meats band friendly... fish IS the best meat...

Ground beef is pretty tolerable for me, usually. When my band is a bit tighter than I'd like and it is being particularly fickle, meatloaf often goes down very well. Something about the consistency... sausage too... sausage usually goes down well. I don't cross anything off my list completely, but chicken is definitely the closest to being crossed off. :thumbup:

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I know I'm STILL having this problem. Last time I went in for a fill (about a week-and-a-half ago), his questionnaire asked if I had PBed, and I said yes, but I considered it operator error. He liked that, lol. Though I eat slowER, I am probably still eating too fast, especially for my new restriction, and not chewing as thoroughly as I could be. However, I realize there will be certain foods (like reheated pork for sure) that I won't be able to have because I HAVE cut that into tiny pieces and chewed to a pulp and it still gets stuck.

"Operator Error" I LOVE IT!!! This is exactly what I have tried to explain to my fiance and my co workers..... I am pretty tight and FINALLY have good restriction. My 4-6oz totally fills me up and I don't get hungry between meals. But--- if I take too big of a bite, ignore when I am tighter (mornings) or don't chew well and take my time-- Hello PB! And also-- I have tried to explain that sometimes it is random--I don't know that I am tight or that a food doesn't sit right until it doesn't. Each day is different. Yesterday I could eat scrambled egg. Today--I thought I was going to die from 2 bites. Why? Who knows. With in the last couple weeks I can no longer eat Pasta or most bread (my italian half is screaming at this latest development). I learned it the hard way but now I know. My fiance gets upset too because he is worried for me.

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Glad you liked that, Kimmy. So did the office staff. :cursing:

I am about to add chicken and steak to my list. I had a lightly re-heated piece of steak for lunch today, and by bite three I was getting totally stuck. Went into the bathroom and PBed... again. Then again, I was pretty upset at work today, so I totally consider it yet another operator error. I wasn't paying attention, so I likely ate like I always did -- just with smaller bites. :)

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Im on my second fill and have no problem with chicken. I just make sure I take little bites and chew very very well. I also make sure I take my time eating anything. I hate the thought of vomitting especially in public. So remember take your time and chew well.

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