Need some advice...

[NP1978 0]

Sorry for the long intro...but I think I need to vent a little bit. My husband and I have been thinking about starting a family, probably in the summer or fall. I moved to NJ a few years ago, but I never got around to establishing a relationship with an OB/GYN. I had gone to one in 2006, but didn't like him at all. So, after looking online, I found one that was near my house. I went to go see her on Jan 21, and she did a breast exam on me, and told me that I wouldn't need a mammogram until I was 35. I told her that I have a history of breast cancer in my family, and many of them were diagnosed in thier early 40s. She told me that I shouldn't worry about that, I should only worry about being so FAT! I told her that I was banded in October, but due to a complication, I was rebanded in April. I started out at about 300 pounds, and am currently at 220 (I am about 5'9 with a goal weight of 160). She told me that she couldn't believe that anyone could ever be that big, and how did I ever let myself get like that. She also through a jab in there about how I took the easy way out of weight loss and basically made fun of me for being able to lose weight on my own. I told her that the band for me helps me not gain weight, rather than lose weight. The losing weight part is still up to me and the types of food I eat. She then proceeded to tell me that her sister practices in India, and how people in India are never as big as me and why that is. I just felt really humiliated, and wanted to just run out of there. Since I was mid-exam, I let her finish. She told me I was normal and that she would see me in a year. Before I left, I told her how my husband and I wanted to start a family later this year. She told me that it would be impossible for me to get pregnant and that if I did that it would be extremely unhealthy for the baby and that I should wait a few years and get my weight down to at least 120-130. I'm like..um..hello I'm 5'9, and it is IMPOSSIBLE for me to get pregnant??!?!? I just ran out of there and went home and cried out of frustration and anger.

Well, anyways, last week after realizing that I haven't gotten my period for 2 weeks, I took a test, and lo and behold...I'M PREGNANT! And, actually, based on my calculations, I was pregnant when I went to go see the doctor on Jan 21. And because of that doctor, I am scared out of my mind! I'm so afraid that I am in danger of hurting my baby because of my weight. I am so afraid to gain weight, and am trying to lose weight. Not dieting at all, but just eating all of the servings of food that are recommended and cutting out all of the junk. Luckily, I don't have any cravings. Only side effects I feel are dizziness when I stand up too long. This has prevented me from exercising, but I am going to try walking (at least 15 mins) if possible.

I guess what I wanted to know is if I should get an unfill. I have a 4cc band and I am at 3.5 cc's right now. I feel like I can eat everything I'm supposed to, and I dont' PB or anything. I'm not even feeling nauseous. Has anyone kept thier fill in the whole time? I have already lost 4 pounds, and I would like to lose some or at least maintain the 220 throughout the pregancy. Any thoughts? Sorry for the rambling...oh and I have my first OB/GYN appt with a new doc on the 23rd. Hopefully it goes better this time!

[mrsebg 0]

First off, Congrats!!! Secondly, I sure hope you are planning on filing a complaint with the Dr office through the office manager or whatever. No one should EVER be treated that way.

Now, I was just banded but all of the questions I had pre-op were about getting pregnant. From what my Dr has told me he will work with my OB and do what they recommend to make sure the baby and I are both getting our nutrients when I finally do get pregnant. My suggestion would be talk to your OB and do what they recommend.

Good luck to you and congrats again!! :frown:

[Anyalee 0]

I did not get an unfill in the first trimester because I didn't have any vomiting and I could eat. I lost about 7 pounds in the first trimester from nausea. In the second trimester, the dr made me unfill a little. I have been able to eat as much as I want since then and I have gained about 15 pounds....that kinda sucks, but I think it won't be too hard to lose after the baby. I still have 16 weeks to go and I hope I don't gain too much more. I'm weighing in at 218 now. I feel like I am in much better health after losing 70 pounds since surgery. Don't let that BIATCH dr get you down. She must yell at all of her patients like that if she expects them to be 120 pounds. Welcome to America! We're fat here! grrrrrrrr......forget her and be happy with baby! YEY & congrats! Welcome to the preggers and banded club!

[ValJean 6]

Congratulations to you!

And I agree 10000% with mrsebg--you should absolutely file a complaint. The way you were treated by your dr is completely inexcusable and just repulsive. People like that should NOT be practicing medicine, and certainly not working in the female health field--going to the GYN for many women is already an uncomfortable experience, the dr should go out of their way to be caring and sensitive to their patients' needs, and be able to discuss their health and wellness--WHATEVER their challenges might be--with tact and respect. ARRGHHH!!!!! Sorry for the rant....I'm just appalled. So sorry you had to go through that.

Congrats again on your happy news, and good luck with your new doc.

All best to you!

Valerie

[HeatherO 7]

I also agree with filing a complaint . . . I am sure you are not the only person that she has spoken with that way. It is important that you let people know because the practice will just keep losing patients with no idea what the problem is if no one ever speaks up.

Congratulations on the pregnancy :0).

You have already lost a significant amount of weight so I am sure you will be healthier now then you would have been before.

I wouldn't think you need an unfill if you can still eat well. If you focus on a healthy diet, getting exercise (which may help you to feel better as well), and getting regular medical care (with a different OB, that's for sure) than you will probably do fine. Many people in the low 200's have very healthy pregnancies and babies. Just make sure to take care of yourself.

[Wheetsin 714]

It is unhealthy to lose after ~18-20 weeks into your pregnancy, until much much later on, and not particularly great to lose before then. The obvious aside, studies are still inconclusive about the effect high ketones in the blood may have on developing foetii.

3.5 in a 4 is way tighter than I can go. While I had "perfect" restriction when I got pregnant and maintained my fill throughout my pregnancy (really needed an unfill, but couldn't get it by the time I needed it), and then had to get two unfills after. I have a 4cc band and went down to 1cc. Just Friday I got bumped back up another .5 cc. I could take some more. I'm not sure what it was about pregnany that made things so tight, but I went about 4 nights of not sleeping because I would reflux constantly due to being so suddenly & insanely tight.

I don't know too many people who have made their pregnancy without needing a fill, regardless of whether they got one or not.

My advice, better late than never. Once your pregnancy has progressed to a certain point, whomever does your fills may refuse until after you have delivered. So why not get one, and have it in case you need it. Even if you "maintain" your weight, you're losing and not maintaining, because just the baby & its system will weigh in around 20 lbs. So by maintaining, you've actually lost.

[ashleyb 0]

OK wtf. is wrong with this doctor. My mouth dropped when i was reading this. I would go back there and be like guess what Im pregnant bitch. And file whatever compliant you can against her and get her fired.

[letterfly 0]

I agree. You should file a complaint! That being said...I got prego with my first at 220lbs. she came out perfect and I had a perfect pregnancy. I too had a doctor that said I wouldn't be able to get pregnant and that was when I was 16 and only weighed 160lbs!!!! She said I had PCOS and that I would have a hard time getting pregnant and would most likely misscarry. Never happened. She was wrong and so is that "Dr." you went to see. Think positive and all will be ok. Congrats! Enjoy ever minute of it. It's so much fun!:hurray: