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Concerns about telling



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Anyone out there have concerns about telling your friends or coworkers you are getting or have had the lap band surgerY? I have told my immediate family who are in total support, but I am hesitant of others being negative towards my decision. They want to tell you horror stories and challenge your decision that you have thought about for months. Its like "why can't she just get on a diet? or quit eating!" They just do not understand.

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I did not tell anyone at work, I am so glad I made that decision to keep it to myself. Told DH and a friend. Just remeber, once you tell you cannot "Untell" and people tend to talk, and it will be told to others. It is a personal choice that you have to make. Some have told everyone, they say it helps to have the support. I just did not want the ever prying eyes on me and watching me every time I took a bite of food etc. I has to be up to you, you will be the one that has to live with it either way.

Good Luck

Laura

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I told everybody. Yes I heard some negative responses. My response was "yes I WISH I could do it YOUR way". That would shut them up .Now those same people tell me how good I look and I say "healthy too".

I really didn't have much trouble. It is a big secret to keep. I couldn't hide my food addiction (all 265 lbs of it). I wasn't going to hide my rehad either.

edie

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I have told my husband and my side of the family. I have not told my co workers even though tempted at times, nor have I told my husbands side of the family. My family understands as they have seen me struggle with weight my whole life. I feel as if my "friends" and co workers would just say oh you are not that fat and really not get it. Even when I get the surgery I do not plan on telling my employer the reason for being out, other than I am having surgery. I am not ashamed I am just realistic to the fact that lots of people don't understand.

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Funny...we did post the same thing! :)

Well...I guess we both have to do what is best for us. I've been so tempted to tell different people, but like a pp said, people talk....

Shannon

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I tell everyone as well! :)

I figure if they see you losing weight and keeping it off then they are gonna talk anyhow because everyone knows that 99% of people who lose weight gain it right back with out some kind of help.

Don't want to be another Star Jones :lol: that was a no brainer watching a fat all of your life woman go down to nothing and lie about it on national TV.

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I am not banded yet. I'm in the Kaiser program and expect it to take awhile. So far I have told only *my immediate family and friends that have done weight loss surgery.

<o:p> </o:p>

In my research I found that a lot of people express negative opinions toward bariatric surgery like its cheating somehow and it makes you a quitter and that you are taking the easy way out. I don't want to deal with the negativity right now. I have done my research talked to my Doctor and interviewed many who have gone forward with it... It’s a decision I am comfortable with it’s not my job to convince everyone else.

<o:p> </o:p>

Hopefully after I am banded and am losing weight. I may tell others that are closer to me as it comes up.

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I was banded on June 2. I have told my family, some co-workers, and a couple close friends. I have mixed reviews. Some people who I thought were going to be supportive were not, and the people who I was worried about have been my biggest supporters. I don't think that I will be telling anyone else right now. I feel like I have told enough people who can help me along the journey, but no one else needs to know at this time. I think that it is important to tell the people who are going to help you along the way.

Like someone said "you can't untell anyone," so my advice would be to really think about who you are telling.

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I have told my family, many of my co-workers, neighbors and friends. Everyone has been very supportive. I attribute some of that to the fact that they have seen me struggle with my weight for many years. My Dad apparently had concerns at first but didn't mention them to me until he had resolved it and realised it was what was best for me.

I had surgery yesterday and the number of people who e-mailed and called with good wishes was astounding. I feel so blessed to have such a supportive group of people in my life.

I expected to have some negative reactions due to what I have read many times on LBT, but luckily for me it did not turn out that way.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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