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Revelation re portion sizes



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Bit of a story with this, but bear with me...

I work on a mining camp and eat in a community dining hall every night when I'm on site. The availability of all that yummy food and the subsequent weight I gained on top of my already hefty size was what drove me to get the band. I've always known that I ate huge portion sizes but up on site, it never seemed all that excessive, especially when compared with all the piled high plates of the burly miners all around me.

Anyway, I've been going to the camp gym most nights and have gotten on a nodding acquaintance with some of the few women on site (I'm not very good at making friends, especially women friends). So, one of the ladies had obviously noticed me making an effort in the gym and asked me today to come to a pilates session they were having after work. I felt a little awkward but agreed to go, and ended up joining her and two other ladies afterwards for dinner. All three of these ladies are very slim and obviously fit.

I served myself up what I have been thinking of as a "bandster sized" meal - largish for the band as I am overdue for a fill and was hungry, but still only enough to fit on a sandwich plate: 1/4 slice of roast meat, 1 baby potato (1/2" diameter), 1 serving spoon of mixed veges, 1 spoon of ravioli (2 pieces of ravioli and 2 slices of mushroom) and a tiny piece of quiche (2" x 1"). I was a little nervous going back to the table, wondering what they'd think of big fat me taking this small meal, whether they'd think I was pretending to eat small for show or something.

When we got to our table, I was shocked to see that my serving size was almost the largest portion taken by anyone there. These ladies weren't on a diet, they weren't trying to eat small, they'd just taken what they normally would take at an evening meal, and guess what? The "bandster size" isn't "tiny" at all!! It was their NORMAL meal size. That really brought home to me how skewed my ideas of portion sizes were. I'd been feeling all good and virtuous about eating these "little" meals and being so "good", and here it was the normal everyday standard for slim, fit, healthy women! No wonder I'm fat :).

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That's an interesting story but one that I'm sure many bandsters would call an "Ah ha!" moment. When the reality of what you have been doing to yourself sets in. I think this is an excellent example of that. Don't be alarmed. We ALL had to go through a period of adjustment in dealing with portion size. And don't be depressed. This was actually a positive experience. You just have to look at it in the right perspective. Now you know. These ladies did you a huge favor and they weren't even aware of it. Once you get a fill, you'll understand better what a proper portion should feel like. Right now it's hell and a struggle, but it will get easier and easier. I'm proud of you for recognizing it for what it was. Many take a lot longer to do so. Hang in there. You'll make it just fine. We're here if you need help.

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You made me realize something by sharing your story, Fanny Adams. My husband has never been overweight until the doctor told him last month that he needed to lose about 20 pounds (he weighed a whopping 180 on his 5'8" frame :smile2:). We have sat down to dinner before and I have looked at his plate and actually been offended because his portion was so much smaller than mine, I thought he must not like what I had fixed. But that isn't it at all. He has never been overweight because he doesn't gorge himself at every meal by taking such huge portions! Maybe I will get him to start fixing my plate at supper and see if that helps. And for the record, he gave up soda and has lost 16 of those 20 pounds already! :tongue2:

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One of the things this did for me was to make me sit down and think about where and how my ideas of portion size got so skewed. I think that, like most people, I took my cues about what was a "normal" portion from the people around me, mainly my extended family. Well guess what? Most of my family are overweight! What's more, the times that I have made the comparisons (over the last 20 years) have always been at special family functions, when we have all been in "party mode", which translates as eating and drinking as much as possible! So my concept of "normal" had over the years become that of the portions taken by a group of fat people in full feeding frenzy.

Now it wasn't always like that. I wasn't always fat, nor have most of my family always been fat. It's something that has crept up on all of us over the last 20 years. Over the years, as our extended family has grown and prospered, we have become used to "living high off the hog's back", and what used to be reserved for special events has become our normal eating patterns. When I recall the habits of the few among us who have remained slim, I realise that I have always looked at their plates and thought "oh they must be dieting" or "gee, so-and-so eats like a bird!"

This forum has actually reinforced that concept in some ways. We all speak about our new portion sizes as being "tiny" and many of us have even worried about what others will think when we eat out. We need to change that mindset and realise that 1 cup of food is NOT excessively small. It is the norm for normal-sized people.

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Took mum to rest today for belated mothers day dinner, we had half a serve beach of chinese veges in oyster sauce, told them did not want greasy so they steamed and put sauce on them and a small serve of steamed chicken and red pork - pork was lean with little sauce on it, then we had a steamed small serve of jelly type rice, and i thought i had eaten way too much. and then had glass of port when got back to her place - small glass -but the largest of the small glasses you can get. Well start afresh again, but really that was not to bad compared to what i would normally have had.

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It is fascinating to look at how a 'normal serving size' has changed over time. 20 years ago, soda came in an 8oz bottle; now it is 20oz and (if you read the label) it says it is 2.5 servings! But we still consume it as if it were 1. Similarly, Bagels used to be 3" diameter; bagels are now 6" and the serving size is 3! How many of us split (or rather, used to split) a single bagel into 3 servings??

Lots of environmental factors have contributed to our situation, although ultimately we are each responsible for our bodies. But I am making sure I ALWAYS read a serving size on anything just to make sure I don't add those extra calories even if it seems like a small number.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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