How long will I need help?

Cristi · May 2, 2008

I'm hoping someone here can help me as my dr. will not give me a straight answer to save his life. What i need to know is how long will I have to have my mom here to help take care of me more impotantly my 4 kids (ages 11,3,1,9 months) Shes coming from out of town, and she needs some idea of how long she'll be here. How long is recovery?, when can I lift my 20lb baby?-when can I drive?, how long should I need painpills? I'm 31 and my BMI is 41.8-should that matter?-Thanx in advance for anyone who can share their experience

janozzi · May 2, 2008

christi, I had my surgery a long time ago and i learned that a lot of what you will be going through will all depend on your frame of mind. The pain from the surgery last about 2 days and each day will get better. Your children can help you a lot, be honest with them and tell them you will need them to really help mom out. You probably will have to wait for about 2 weeks before you can do lifting. As far as the pain pills;after the 2 day you won't need them or maybe just take motrin. Like I said don't let your mind be the devil and let you think you can't do this, you can. Walk after the surgery as soon as you can or the gas pain will really bother you. If you have to pass gas, do it, its better out than in.

Good Luck

jayme · May 2, 2008

Hi, I am only two days after surgery, and I told my mom she didn't need to stay, because I can pretty much take care of myself and my boys are 12 and 15, so other than driving (which I have not tried yet) I'm supposed to be getting up and walking, going potty, etc.

I have to imagine you need at least a week to 10 days before you can be lifting your little ones. The pain/tighness is not in your lower belly (like a c-section) but more in your chest. My arms still feel strong and I think I would be ok having a baby sit on my lap as long as they're not too rough.

my doc says driving is ok after 24 hrs with no perscription pain meds.

Chrisann · May 2, 2008

Everyone is different. I needed that full week to recover, and went back to work on the 8th day, and I probably should have taken a few days more.

Because I had a hernia repaired, I couldn't lift for or do any core exercises for 4 weeks. I couldn't drive for 10 days, and really took that to heart.

I guess since its your mom, and she is coming from out of town, make a visit out of it. Besides, Moms dote on you after surgery. I loved being 40 and having my parents with me after surgery.

pearlygirl · May 2, 2008

No more than 2-3 days . I have a 20lb 18 month old and have done just fine with her

kristylyn · May 2, 2008

You should listen to your BODY mainly and take those 1 to 2 weeks of your recovery. I had 1 1/2 weeks of recovery and I had pain where my port was so I couldn't bend down like I wanted so my mom had to be here with me during the day and when my hubby got home he was there. But don't pick up on your kids unless you have to cause your insides are still healing and you don't want to hurt yourself. So I guess to tel you to listen to your body and feel what's right for you. Yes everyone and body is different..Hope this helps

greeneyedlady19 · May 2, 2008

my daughter also took off for 2 weeks to heal up etc. after a couple of days she did not have pain, except her port and some chest and shoulder pain. dr. alberto aceves in mexicali did her surgery. you should not lift for 2 weeks after. so if mom can stick around that time, that would be good beings you have the little ones!!

Skinny2Be · May 2, 2008

I'm a week in and I'd certainly agree with the post that says lifting the kids will be the real challenge.

From day one I was able to look after myself in terms of going to the toilet, washing, walking about etc. On day three, when I was released from the hospital, I felt fine - able to cook and live as I usually do.

The only thing I wouldn't want to do right now is loads of bending over and lifting. I'd be worried about popping my stitches!

gingerbug · May 2, 2008

Iwas in the same situation. My doc told me that to do as little as possible and to take it easy. If it hurt, dont do ing. My littlest was 19 months and was about 23 pounds. My plan was to change him on the floor and to get down with him where he was. He could get himself in and out of the chair so it was really the in and out of bed that I was concerned about. Iwas able to lift him without pain by day 6 or so, bearing his weight on my right side. I had dh do most of the 'heavy lifting' for two weeks but I could have taken over all the usual duties earlier. My mom and dh left (dh went out of the country for work) two weeks after the surgery and Iwas left alone to do everything. I even had to sometimes carry my youngest and we live on the second floor. I had no problems, no pain at all. Iwas careful and paid attention if something hurt I did not ddo it. I instructed the kids not to rough house with me. So, Ithink your doc is being vague because every one is different and everyone heals differently.

Luscious · May 2, 2008

Well I don't have kids - and I don't know how much help you have from a husband or partner, or if you are single mum. Everyone is different. I tried to go grocery shopping after 6 days and ended up having to have it home delivered. Things such as washing, housework, etc might be challenging. I would struggle caring for all those young kids even without the surgery :-) so pat on the back for you and all the mums.

Personally, I think you should plan to have your mom for at least 1 week. I really didn't want to do much but sleep (snooze) for the first 4 days - but I had to stay on painkillers for a few days longer than some.

Best wishes for your journey.