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Should I have a goal?



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So all of my close friends know about my surgery, and everyone is super helpful and understanding and I love them all for it. However with that being said with only one week to surgery my girl friends keep saying things to me like " your gonna loose soo much weight", and "your gonna be sooo skinny" and as encouraging as that is I know it's quite possible I may never be skinny or I may not loose the weight as fast as everyone thinks. I really do try to explain that to them and tell them not to expect too much cause I just don't know. I don't know how my body's going to react I don't know anything about how it's going to be afterwards. I just don't want to much pressure because as long as i'm doing my part however the weight comes off is fine with me. My step-dad asked me what my 1st goal was and I had to tell him whatever I loose is my goal I just don't want to gain anymore. Is it weird that i'm not setting goals for certain dates or is it good that i'm not setting myself especially since I havn't been banded yet? :confused2:

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Not everyone is goal oriented. If you are comfortable with not having a goal, then that's fine.

I set smaller goals and non-food prizes for reaching the goal (generally art supplies I would never otherwise buy). It works for me.

It might be a good idea for you to commit to living by band rules and to make sure you are actively participating in your weight loss. Not having a goal does not mean that you don't have to participate, because a band by itself will not necessarily get you to weight loss paradise. :glare:)

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I think you need to define "GOAL". It doesn't need to be a number on the scale, but it needs to be something for you to strive for. Also, it doesn't need to be public, it can be your own internal goal...but they say people who state goals publically achieve them better. But your public can be a journal or here...

Anyway, yes, create a goal, like exercising or following the rules 99% of the time. It doesn't need to be your end goal, but milestone that you can reach and feel accomplished for reaching them.

Go for it.

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I don't know that you need a set final goal, but you should have some mini goals... as example, 2 sizes down from where you are, or 5 BMI points, or something like that. Have little goals as far as you think you'll go. Mini goals help me from going crazy sometimes.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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