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Help! I don't want my new lifestyle to come between me and my spouse!



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My husband says he wants to lose weight but all he wants to do is eat, drink, and be merry. He'll go on a diet and lose 8-10 lbs, stop dieting and then a couple weeks later he's gained it all back. I can't get him off the couch and if I say something he gets mad or sulks. I married him knowing he was heavy. I'm not trying to insist that he loses weight, I'm just worried about him being so young and so inactive. I want to change my lifestyle to be more active because I know its good for my weight, my health, and my mood. I don't want us to grow apart. Any advice...?

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Give him time.

My DH has always been interested, he needs to lose weight himself. I wouldnt say my weight loss has caused trouble between us but occasionally he gets stroppy at my commitment to running. He's a good dieter but basically, he doesnt like exercise, and he struggles to commit to it, which translates into some petty jelousy at my success. Only every now and then, its not too much of a problem.

Anyway, I think he must occasionally feel left behind to a degree, he wants what I'm having! He's getting banded in 2 months. His journey will be different to mine, no doubt but I knew sooner or later he'd decide to take his health into his own hands just like I did. But its taken him this long to be ready. You cant push, they have to get there themselves.

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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