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Adjusting to changing shape



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I was posting my myspace blog and talking about my shape changing and the issues I'm having believing how different I am starting to be physically. I purchased a sweater on Sunday and on Monday, went to put it on. When I looked at it, since it is smaller that what I'm 'used' to wearing, I had a gut-wrenching panic and denial that I could wear that sweater. I told my husband, "I can't wear that! It'll be too small! I just don't think I can put it on!" Of course, he looked at me like I had lost my ever-loving mind and giving me the 'then why the hell did you buy it' look. You know the look... the one that says "OMG, she's been to Zappos/C.J. Banks/T. J. Maxx/Kirkland's/Old Time Pottery/shopping, etc again" look. He, in his infinite wisdom, kept his mouth shut. Anyway, I put that sweater on and it fit, perfectly, if not a little big. I really have no idea how to adjust my thinking when it comes to appearance. Honestly, I hope that I adjust mentally, as easily as I have physically.

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It takes time. I still look at things and think "No way that's going to fit," only to have them be loose. But at the same time I look at my pre-op pants and thing, "Oh %^$@$*# was I seriously THAT big?!?!"

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:wink2:Everyone seems to change their ideas of themselves in diffent ways. People were telling how great I was looking. I was getting really upset because I had not seen what they did. But 2 weeks ago I looked in the mirror and someone new looked back at me. She looked a little tired but cute as heck. I am working with her to hopefully reveal a great bod in the spring!! We'll let you know.

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Sometimes I think I'm thinner than I am. Sometimes I'm surprised by how thin I am. Just kind of depends.

My office has glass doors, and if I'm not paying attention and look into them, I won't recognize myself at first.

On the flip side, at dinner the other night (I was sitting parallel to some windows) I turned to look out the window and caught the reflection of my side profile, and was dismayed and how much "roll" I still had on my upper body. Maybe it's not that much, really, but to me it looked like a heck of a lot.

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It takes time. I still look at things and think "No way that's going to fit," only to have them be loose. But at the same time I look at my pre-op pants and thing, "Oh %^$@$*# was I seriously THAT big?!?!"

i do that all the time. i have pants that i bought a few months ago that were on sale and they were 2 sizes smaller than what i was wearing at the time. i looked at a pair yesterday and said to myself, there is no possible way i can squeeze my gut into those. they fit and they fit well, maybe even a tad loose.

i make an effort to try on my size 6XL pants once a month just to show myself how far i've come. if im depressed cause the scale just.wont.budge, i try those on and it generally changes my demeanor.

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I can soooo relate. How long will it take for my head to catch up? My nieces, actually gave me some of the jeans they won't wear... I thought, even though they are... NOT Small... I will never fit into their jeans. Today I was asked (while wearing them), "when will you get some smaller jeans - those are too baggy"! I was shocked. Will my head catch up?

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i make an effort to try on my size 6XL pants once a month just to show myself how far i've come. if im depressed cause the scale just.wont.budge, i try those on and it generally changes my demeanor.

That is great advice! I am definitely going to do this when I hit my first plateau. Thank you! :lol:

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i make an effort to try on my size 6XL pants once a month just to show myself how far i've come. if im depressed cause the scale just.wont.budge, i try those on and it generally changes my demeanor.

What an awesome idea!

I have boxed up most of my old clothes and I am only buying a few pieces at a time to make it through, but man... it's very odd to change quickly!:rolleyes2:

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When I started really losing, my mind couldn't grasp it. I actually thought my legs were shrinking and I was getting shorter because my pants were longer and I would trip over them. I actually fell at work on day because I tripped over my pants. It took another bandster that I work with to tell me that I've lost so many inches in my hips that my pants were longer. I was glad to know that I wasn't losing my mind and I wasn't shrinking in height!!

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lol Amy!

I have to wear heals, boots etc with my pants now. My flats won't work because I keep stepping on my pants and tripping too.

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Been there, done that w/ the long pants. BUT, I've had to go back to buying TALL pants, again because my legs are longer since my gut isn't in the way! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!

I had purchased a nice pair of pants back before Christmas and they had gotten really loose. SO, in my infinite wisdom, thought it would be ok to actually dry them after I washed them. My unfortunate decision didn't shrink them in the right places, however. They were still baggy as all get out, but about 6 inches above my flippin' ankles! Guess they are going in the yard sale box!

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Hi,

I just want to tell you that you are a work in progress, be patient with yourself!

Also, we were banded on the same day :-) 12/13/07... You have lost much more then me though! Good Job!

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I had this happen this past weekend. Went to buy some new, smaller clothes, and was still looking in my old size. My daughter had to remind me (after I got to the dressing room) that I do not have to shop in the Plus sizes any more! Yay!

It feels weird...

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I'm not sure you ever adjust. I'm having real trouble with it, I keep saying here (and elsewhere) that I just want to lose 5 more kgs. People react with "no, dont lose anymore, you dont need to" etc and I dont believe them. But I think the truth is that I really DONT need to lose anymore, my weight is perfectly healthy, I just cannot really SEE myself as I am. I cannot adjust to not having to be "on a diet" anymore, I have been trying to lose weight since I was 10 years old, even though most of that time I wasnt even more than a few kgs overweight.

So even at the end of the journey, there's issues. I've even been panicking lately that I eat too much, yet, my weight has remained stable, so why the phuck am I afraid to eat when ALL I have to do is maintain. I dont have to diet.

And yeah, I still have to come back OUT of the changing room because everything I've taken in is way too big.

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That sounds a bit like my friend Steph. She and her sister went shopping AFTER Steph's Tummy Tuck and she had on her size 12 underwear. Now keep in mind, Steph is about a size 6 or 8 now... I have no idea how she was keeping her baggy drawers up!!!! LOL She and I have chitchatted quite a bit about this. She's 5 years post op from the band and 3 years post op from her tummy-tuck and breast implants and she STILL tries to go look at the plus-size clothing.

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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