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Ok pardon my ignorance. I truly am, I don't know much about AA except what I have seen on movies.

I read the 12 steps for OA. Now.. how does that help?

I thought in AA, you make amends, because due to your alcoholism you've hurt people, etc.

But doing this for OA seems like a joke. Seriously, I don't understand?

You apologize to someone because you're fat, ????

I'm not trolling or trying to flame, I'm truly ignorant on the subject and would like educating. Because I think I am addicted to overeating, and I think I've made strides with the band, but the binge times still come, so I'm of course curious for other options. But the 12 steps seems very odd.

The important part to take away from the 12 steps is the turning over of your will to a higher power. The spirituality replaces the will power that has failed us all. You also don't have to take the 12 streps by heart, pick and choose what works for you.

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Some of the things people in OA make amends for are:

-eating other people's food (at work, home, kid's halloween candy)

-numbing self out with food and being emotionally unavailable for family and friends,

-some shoplift food,

-focusing so much on food for you that you short your family their favorites when you grocery shop,

-not enjoying friend's company because you are trying to figure out when dinner will be served,

-choosing activities based on the food served,

-not going to activities because of shame of size (like kid's school events)

You don't need to cross this bridge until you WORK the steps which means you go over each one with someone who is ahead of you in recovery and who has also worked the steps.

Hope this gives you more ideas.

Connie

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the truth of the matter is that is does not matter what one uses to 'check out' - alcohol, drugs, food, sex, gambling etc etc.

the problem isn't those 'things'. the problem is, as the book says, centered in our minds. we are uncomfortable in our skin and are unable to live in the day that we're in without reaching for something else.

the purpose of the program of AA/OA/GA/SA/CA/MA ... (as it says on page 45 of the Big Book) is to help us find a power greater than yourself that will solve our problems. it also says, on the same page, LACK OF POWER THAT WAS OUR DILEMMA.

i first got into AA back in 2001. i could put together some time (9months, year, 6 months etc etc) but kept 'going out'. My sobriety date is 12/10/06 and for the first time ever i've been in the book more and have truly worked all steps. i also sponsor 3 guys. for those of you who are new to AA or at an impasse, i suggest reading page 567. then go to page 45, then to page 25 and i finish up with the Doctors Opinion. Then start with Bill Story and go for it!

that really lays the ground work for what AA is, our problem and the solution.

if anyone wants to chat about things, feel free to PM me anytime.

you best resource in your area is AA Central Office. Google it and call them.

*remember "time", as they call it means nothing. you could have 6 months or 60 years. just b/c someone has lots of time under their belt doesn't mean that are a good resource to go to. don't listen to their words, look at their actions. are they resentful, judgmental, gossiping, self centered, acting on ego? if so, regardless of 'time' look for someone else to work with.

AA saved my life. and now with this little band thing - i get to live my life.

check out my sponsors website: www.theaaway.com

there is an awesome meditation on the homepage. PM me with your thoughts.

Edited by RAS_STI

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I must say, I am scared to death about being banded and not being able to give up the alcohol. .

Funny, I was afraid of that too. Now I'm afraid of what will happen if I don't stop. It's gotten out of hand. Completely.

Anyone have any experience with antabuse or other drugs like it? I am strongly considering trying it. Something has to give. I got this band to be a healthier me, not a useless drunk.

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My Brother is a raging alcoholic. The only thing that has helped him is the antibuse. It is worth a try. Good luck.

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

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