167 was my lowest weight and I was determined to keep going, then life happened. I started a new, stressful job, bought a house, moved within a month, and then my dog died in my arms all within a year. To say I'm disgusted with myself is an understatement. Being someone who considers themselves a perfectionist, this is really dragging me down. On top of all this good stuff, my body dysmorphia is unreal. I see my current self in pictures or in the mirror and I see my 300lb. self. Even though I'm in medium clothes when I used to be in 2-3X, I can't get myself to see the change. I didn't have the surgery for vanity. It was successful in helping me come off of diabetes and high blood pressure meds. But now that my life feels like it's finally getting back to a normal rhythm (besides having a 6-month old puppy), I am ready to get back on track and get back down to a reasonable weight. I can see the gain in my face, and it's killing my confidence (if I ever had any).

I've talked to my gastric bypass team - I know what to do, but I'm having a hard time getting back on track. I'm trying baby steps, but I'm looking for other tricks and tips for getting there. Any and all feedback is appreciated.

Best

There are things I could suggest to help you get back to your goal weight, but my fear is that until you address the reason you regained weight, you're just going be back on the diet yo-yo. My suggestion would be to seek out a mental health professional that specializes in eating disorders. I'm not saying you definitely have an eating disorder (that would be up to them to diagnose), but it would appear on the surface that you may at a minimum suffer from disordered eating. I'm basing that on your post that seems to indicate that you may be self-soothing with food.

Once you've got that under control, my next recommendation would be to seek out a Registered Dietitian to help you with a sustainable diet. There is no shame in seeking help from professionals and they will be in a better position to assist you than anyone here that can just give general advice.

Thank you so much. I’ve talked with a therapist before, but she wasn’t even knowledgeable to the Bariatric issues I was facing months ago.

From various bariatric groups that I'm in, I hear that the people who regained weight who luckily regained control of their situation, They stated that they shifted their mindset and went back to things that Worked from the beginning. some said they quit night time snacking. Some went back to tracking their food, some stopped over eating, some stopped eating out and went back to cooking their own food and meal prepping, so it looked like they were just getting back to the basics that helped them lose the weight at first. Movement was a big aspect as well. They started back walking Or running.

Edited January 27, 20251 yr by Mspretty86

26 minutes ago, Mspretty86 said:

From various bariatric groups that I'm in, I hear that the people who regained weight who luckily regained control of their situation, They stated that they shifted their mindset and went back to things that Worked from the beginning. some said they quit night time snacking. Some went back to tracking their food, some stopped over eating, some stopped eating out and went back to cooking their own food and meal prepping, so it looked like they were just getting back to the basics that helped them lose the weight at first. Movement was a big aspect as well. They started back walking Or running.

This is all excellent advice!

Of course not everything above will work for everyone. It's just a matter of finding what works for each person as an individual. Take it slow, pick one thing to work on at a time and make sure you really have that part down before adding more changes. The worst possible thing anyone can do is try to completely overhaul their diet and fitness overnight. That almost never works.

That’s a big issue I have is feeling like I need to change EVERYTHING right now. I need to focus on baby steps and doing one thing at a time. Thank you both.

Make a list of all those things you want to change. Pick just one to focus on THIS week. Make sure though, that it's something small that you can measure in some way.

For example, you can't say "I'm going to eat better", because that's too big and too vague. Instead, pick something even smaller and definitive like "instead of eating ice cream after dinner every day this week, I'm only going to eat ice cream 4 days this week". That's probably small enough that your brain won't make a huge fuss over it, and is also easily measurable. If you successfully make that change and can keep doing it for two or preferably three weeks, then you can more on. For example, maybe after three weeks, you decide to move to only eating ice cream once a week. Again, you need to be able to successfully do that before moving on again. If you fail, no worries, just try again. If you keep struggling, you may have picked something too big and you need to scale it back.

I would also recommend alternating diet and exercise goals. Thus if you successfully made a diet change that you're able to stick with, next time maybe it's "I'm going to walk after dinner 3 days this week". By alternating in this way, you'll find the diet changes are easier to adjust to and at the same time, you'll be improving your health. Just make sure to go slow with these as well. I often see people in the gym (especially this time of year), that tried to go from basically doing nothing, to working out 5+ days a week. Sadly, the failure rate for such people is well north of 90%.

Here's the thing. This will take a LONG time, but if you try to go faster because you're feeling impatient, the likelihood is that you won't be able to maintain the loss, you'll fall off the diet, and before you even realize it, you'll be right back where you were before.

I also want to be clear, I do still recommend seeking out counseling for a possible eating disorder, as well as help from an RD. Dieting is HARD. if it was easy, we wouldn't have an obesity epidemic. The smart play here is to stack the cards in your favor by getting help from experts.

I'm so sorry about your pup! I completely understand and their death sticks with you and is devastating. I hope your new pup helps soothes your pain.

Edited January 28, 20251 yr by BlondePatriotInCDA

I would suggest you see an RD (Registered Dietitian) who specializes in working with post bariatric patients. They will be able to help you reset your plate so that the food you are eating supports healthy weight loss without feeling like you're on a diet. You can also look into joining a group where people are focused on similar goals. I've heard great things about WW because it's not about tracking calories, it's about making small changes to how and what we eat so that healthy habits become the norm.

I would also suggest you start working with someone who can help you focus on your mental health - this is a big part of why people gain back weight after having bariatric surgery. Many clinics have therapists available, but there are other options (online and in person) that you could look into as well.

Lastly, if you have access to online coaching through your insurance company, take advantage! That is what it's there for and you can get help from a coach who specializes in post bariatric patients - I think this would be the biggest piece of advice I would give anyone who has had bariatric surgery. You are worth taking that extra step to have access to resources so you can be your very best self!

All my love, friend! You got this! It's totally normal to feel as though life has thrown everything at you all at once and now you're struggling a bit but you know what? We are so lucky we live in an age where there is no shortage of resources to help us succeed. I hope these suggestions will be helpful for you.

Xo