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do you ever just feel huge? lol



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Last couple weeks i have felt a lot bigger than usual. Like a lot more fat than usual on the stomach i am like wtf am i gaining more weight? But i check the scale and its the same as it was a couple weeks ago. almost 9 months out the weight loss slowed down dramatically. For the previous 30 days i have only lost maybe 3lb which sucks but it is what it is. I am taking my first flight since weight loss here in the next 2 weeks and i have always bought first class tickets because well coach seats are tiny and horrible for overweight people. Now i can fit in them and my wallet is so happy not to buy a first class ticket lol.

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Yep. Dealing with that now. Feel like I haven't made any progress and getting fatter, even though that's not the case. Almost 8 months out and the weight loss has definitely slowed. I'm still trying to focus on the non scale victories, but it gets hard when I don't FEEL like I am making progress. My head thinks I'm 388 pounds and size 28/30 again, even though I'm 285 and size 20.

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Yep I am feeling the same saw some photos of myself from the last few days and thought darn it I am still fat, although no where near as big as I used to be in photos but I hearing you guys. I haven't had any weight loss since the 9 month post op mark either 😕.

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When I was at my heaviest, I think I felt littler than I was. Now at 3 years out, I know that I am at a normal weight, but I still always feel like one of the biggest people in the room (logically I know that's not true but it's how I feel). And of course, some days I'm more bloated than others and that doesn't help.

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All. The. Damn. Time.

It doesn't help that I'm not, like, wrong. I am, in fact, huge, just not as mind-numbingly enormous as I used to be.

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I feel this way every time I look in a mirror. Even though my clothes are huge on me it still feels like I haven't loss anything. People will tell me oh you lost weight and look smaller and that small part of my brain will think they are just being nice and playing along. Like others on this topic my weight loss has slowed down but I keep trying and moving on.

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Body dysmorphia. It can bring us down, make us doubt ourselves & mess with our reality far too often.

I have odd days when I question & doubt my size. Even yesterday, I very tentatively & reluctantly put on a pair of jeans thinking the worst: they won’t fit, they’ll be tight. Were they? No. They fit fine. Looked good. Logically I knew they would but my head was saying Christmas, too many Desserts, fat. I knew the scales read only 200g more over the week of Christmas. Yep, 200g, 7 freckin’ ounces, & my mind went to crazy extremes Thankfully it was only a brief bout of insanity until I told myself not to be so damn foolish.

Wish I’ll never have those thoughts ever again, though I think they may always happen in some form. I am glad though that over time I’ve got better at recognising them for what they are (mind games) & can remind myself of the truth of my reality more quickly so I can ignore them. Hopefully you will too.

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Yes, and I am objectively from a numbers standpoint no longer "fat" with a BMI of 22 (although it obviously could be a lot lower there is no medical/health reason for me to lose more). I constantly struggle, scrutinize, and measure. Try on pants in all different sizes out of my own closet to try to verify nothing has changed. I'm in therapy for it but without intervention I have been dangerously close to crossing into disordered behavior.

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Yes. I don't really see a change in my body, even though I am down 79# ad 3 clothes sizes. I feel like I look and feel the same or bigger.

I also noticed that since my skin is kind of loose, things seem worse.

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yep.

i'm over 4 yrs out (and been my current weight more or less the last 3.5 years!) and i still, on occasion, ask my fam "do i look fat in this?"

...then they roll their eyes and say no, but still some part of me thinks they are lying.

(...of course there ARE days when i look in the mirror pat myself on the back and do a mental mic drop, lol. i guess it all depends on the day)

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Yessss! I’m glad you mentioned this. I’m feeling this now like my weight went to my stomach which is making me feel fat still. Not sure if its normal but now i feel like i need surgery on my stomach. I had my surg in March 2022.

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I have this thing where I'll feel healthy & thinner at home but as soon as I'm in public where people look at me I'll feel HUGE. I'll see a skinny person & my thoughts go back to when I was 300lbs & just feel massive. Not in a sad, depressing way. My brain just tells me that's still my reality!

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Yes! I live in a fairly wealthy town where most people are thin even into their 40s. It’s like high school sometimes where I still feel like I compare myself to those women smaller than me even though I’m not very big myself. It’s totally normal!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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