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Is this right for me? A little (ok, a lot) scared...



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I know that's a question that only I can really answer, but it's one that keeps spinning through my head. I came to this site today to do a bit more research and realized I had joined back in 2018! So yeah, this is something I've thought about off and on for the last four years. What's stopping me? First, I have had SO many surgeries in the last decade. Fourteen to be exact. I really don't want another one. Second, the thought of having part of my body removed (especially my stomach) is triggering and scary. Been there, done that.

A bit of history: Up until about 8-9 years ago, I was a fairly thin and fit person. In Jan 2012, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I went through five months of really rough chemo, a mastectomy (a body part removal), anti-estrogen meds for seven years, surgeries galore (including an oophorectomy - another body part removal), depression, anxiety, depression and anxiety meds (even ones that say they don't cause weight gain - HA!)... just a lot. Through all that, the scale just went up and up. I'm now 80 lbs overweight, pre-diabetic, have sleep apnea, and my cholesterol is high for the first time in my life, and just mostly feel like hell.

In the last four years, I have tried several (doctor prescribed) "weight loss" meds, injections, a liquid diet, an elimination diet, calorie counting, points counting, exercise, nutritional counseling, intermitant fasting, acupuncture... the list goes on and on. Nothing has worked or has been sustainable.

So I came here to just get more info and couldn't resist clicking on topics that speak to regret (I know I shouldn't do that, but I couldn't help it). I mean, this is a no-going-back situation. Most of the stomach is being removed! I know there are no guarantees that I won't have regrets, or that the procedure will work or that I won't have complications, but I WANT those guarantees. So much in the last ten years has been up in the air and I hate that feeling. But I also hate feeling miserable in my own body, so...

How did you make that final decision to go forward? I want to lose this weight more than anything. but this is a really huge decision I wish I didn't have to make.

Sorry for the long post. And thank you in advance for any insight you can offer!

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Posted (edited)

It’s a big decision and it takes however long it takes (don’t rush it). That being said now that I have done it my only regret is not doing it sooner. Perhaps if you search a little bit on other sites about the complications of the comorbidities that you are up against if you don’t do anything and the medical interventions and possibly even surgeries that you may need down the road if you don’t have WLS you will realize that the risks of not doing surgery are worse than the risks that come with this surgery.

I know for me I realized it was time to have the surgery when already at a BMI of 33 I had knee pain that kept me from exercising and without that activity I gained back all the weight I had just lost from doing my treadmill at home all through the first year of COVID. I could just forsee it snowballing to get worse and worse because my gynocologist gave me my weight history and I had gained steadily (outside of the yo yo dieting) over the last ten years at least (they could only go back that far).

There is also a thread on here called weirdest non scale victories that I always recommend to anyone who is on the fence about surgery. It’s just a reminder of all the little things outside of the more obvious medical issues that change in your life when you lose the weight and there are many many little things that are not scale related.

The last thing I will add is that for many of us our insurance requires six months of supervised diet before they submit for approval so starting the process while you are still thinking about it couldn’t hurt. You can always put it off if you are still on the fence after the six months but my guess is you will probably have made up your mind by then.

Edited by ShoppGirl

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Thank you! I was just discussing the comirbidities with my husband and how this would improve those. The good thing is, he’s behind me whatever I decide. And I have been seeing weight loss doctors since 2018, both in my former state of Illinois and after we moved here to California not quite three years ago. I wonder if all that, and all the different avenues I tried, would satisfy that six month wait time.

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1 hour ago, Momma_Fro said:

Thank you! I was just discussing the comirbidities with my husband and how this would improve those. The good thing is, he’s behind me whatever I decide. And I have been seeing weight loss doctors since 2018, both in my former state of Illinois and after we moved here to California not quite three years ago. I wonder if all that, and all the different avenues I tried, would satisfy that six month wait time.

Possibly. I was able to use another doctors notes to satisfy one month of mine. It depends on how well they documented what you were trying and whether they documented your weight, etc.

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3 hours ago, Momma_Fro said:

Most of the stomach is being removed! I know there are no guarantees that I won't have regrets, or that the procedure will work or that I won't have complications, but I WANT those guarantees.

Unfortunately, nobody can give you those guarantees. If you stick with the surgeon's plan for you, odds are fantastic that things will work out like they're supposed to. But there are no guarantees with anything. It's a big decision, yes, but it's a bigger decision to do nothing. i knew it was time to do something drastic when I couldn't walk without pain, couldn't control my weight no matter what I did (and I did A LOT), when I looked through old pics and saw how thin and mobile and healthy I used to be, and when I got sick of having diabetes and high blood pressure. I have PCOS and MS, and I want to eliminate as many pills as I can (I already have some I'll have to take for the rest of my life) and I decided I was sick and tired of letting life pass me by because of choices I was making (or not making). Maybe look into some therapy to help you through your fears and help you decide what the best route to go is. Make sure you make a decision that is best for you and that you'll be happy with.

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Posted (edited)

14 hours ago, Momma_Fro said:

Second, the thought of having part of my body removed (especially my stomach) is triggering and scary.

A bit of history: Up until about 8-9 years ago, I was a fairly thin and fit person. In Jan 2012, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I went through five months of really rough chemo, a mastectomy (a body part removal), anti-estrogen meds for seven years, surgeries galore (including an oophorectomy - another body part removal), depression, anxiety, depression and anxiety meds (even ones that say they don't cause weight gain - HA!)... just a lot. Through all that, the scale just went up and up. I'm now 80 lbs overweight, pre-diabetic, have sleep apnea, and my cholesterol is high for the first time in my life, and just mostly feel like hell.

In the last four years, I have tried several (doctor prescribed) "weight loss" meds, injections, a liquid diet, an elimination diet, calorie counting, points counting, exercise, nutritional counseling, intermitant fasting, acupuncture... the list goes on and on. Nothing has worked or has been sustainable.

So I came here to just get more info and couldn't resist clicking on topics that speak to regret (I know I shouldn't do that, but I couldn't help it). I mean, this is a no-going-back situation. Most of the stomach is being removed! I know there are no guarantees that I won't have regrets, or that the procedure will work or that I won't have complications, but I WANT those guarantees. So much in the last ten years has been up in the air and I hate that feeling. But I also hate feeling miserable in my own body, so...

I totally understand what you mean about removing part of your stomach. I feel the same way. There are weight loss surgeries that do not remove anything and are reversible. Just know that you have options.

Losing weight helps decrease systemic inflammation, so that may be of some benefit given your history of cancer. It can perhaps reduce your chances of any inflammatory type of illnesses in the future.

And it's always smart to get the good, the bad and the ugly sides of any weight loss procedure that you're considering. It will help you to be better prepared for what you may face in the future.

Best wishes on your journey!

Edited by BypassingMyPhatAss

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