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Am i wrong for eating a half of a Peanut Butter sandwich( i try to stay clear of bread) and a whole muffin last night because i feel guilty like i did something wrong, when i am looking for something sweet i eat a Keto bar and it does the trick and tonight for dinner my wife and i are getting a pizza and we never get a pizza , am i acting out through food am i being reckless , i don't know i just i have to buckle down and get serious with this program otherwise i could possibly get denied ( am i making any sense) i really believe i am thinking way to much my PCP just put in my consult for gastric bypass and i have my first virtual appt April 1st i guess i am a ways away from my surgery i am a very thorough guy and i like to have things in order beforehand so there are no screw ups when the time comes ,anyway ,i have to be honest when i write a post i am never sure what to say or if i will even get a response , i guess i just need to relax and hopefully i can make some friends in the process.

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Have you tried counseling? I'm a big fan of it. It's got me through the journey and my bad eating patterns. I'm over a month post op and having that counseling allows you to see why you do something and what to do instead. My urges to overeat were greatly reduced pre op and now that I'm post op, I have no urges to overeat. I've been with my psychologist for 10 months now. She's the best!

I still eat food I like (that I can tolerate and is part of my plan) and I don't believe in moralizing food. It's people's bad behavior around food that's an issue, not the food.

Moderation is key and learning to eat more Protein over carbs is a good idea pre op. An easy way to do that is having a daily protein and calorie goal so you can get the right food in and not overdo it.

Don't beat yourself up for eating things that aren't right for you in the moment either. Part of successful weight loss is believing in yourself and not giving up or beating yourself down so much because of a mistake. I still have my moody days trust me but any good dietician will tell you progress, not perfection. Especially if eating is emotional for you.

Just make sure you're honest with your team and set clear goals and boundaries with food and weight. They're there to help you. Build a treatment team if you feel like you don't have control over what you're eating. And im sure lots other who comment on this thread will have good advice! Welcome to the community.

Sent from my SM-G975U using BariatricPal mobile app

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Thats great! I hope youve been able to work on eating behaviors with the.

You could consider how important this is to you. Really visualize how weight loss surgery will help your life. Find a big reason and keep it in the forefront of your mind. It's not easy and takes will power but having a "because" can really push you along. It's not inherently bad that you've eaten certain foods but really you only know if you're being reckless through food. If the food is triggering for you and keeps you from sticking to a plan, it could be reckless. It's good you find better alternative food items but also think of alternatives that aren't related to food. My therapist always said put distance between you and food. I know your appointment isn't right away but it's coming up! Keep thinking about why you're doing this and put the work in to eat and live in a way that makes you a good candidate for bariatric surgery. The work is up to you at the end of the day. If you make a mistake get back on the horse. You have the rest of your life to enjoy all kinds of food in moderation. The time before your surgery and while you're healing after is a time to take a step back and relearn everything about nutrition and eating down to the core.

Sent from my SM-G975U using BariatricPal mobile app

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I liked your analogy about am i being reckless through food that is something i never thought about, good point. I have never talked to my therapist about food but i will now that you have planted the seed , BIG GOAL and reason for this SX is i have a really bad back and by having this SX it will take a lot of weight off my back(lower back), not to drastically change the topic but you are very , anyhow i'm from Massachusetts where are you from i swear the older i gert the more i hate the cold in the snow and not in that order LOL.

I seriously do not think i am reckless i am not saying i could not become as such but i think i am pretty honest , i have a great life and i love it and i am real excited about my being in the procces of waiting for the SX my wife as a matter of fact had gastric bypass a long time ago (95) she tries to tell me some info but it was so long ago that she doesn't want to mislead me and i can't you know what i mean.

Coop

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Is your therapist experienced with eating disorders & bariatric patients? It’s a more specialised field & just something to consider. Understanding our relationship with food is a huge part of this process & our success.

Wanting to start incorporating improved eating habits now is great. But you don’t have to do everything all at once. Small wins are always best. Make one or two small changes & get them established over a couple of weeks before changing or incorporating something else. Focus on Protein. Increase your Fluid intake. Then try smaller portion sizes. Up your vegetable intake. Reduce your Snacks. Try some new cooking methods & new recipes. You don’t have to do everything at once. It’s not a race.

I know from your earlier post you have an issue with blame & being critical of yourself for perceived failures. I wonder if you asking whether it’s ok or wrong to have a peanut paste sandwich is you subconsciously looking for a way to beat yourself up if you do have the sandwich & people say don’t? It’s also interesting that you question a peanut paste sandwich but not the pizza. Whether you have the sandwich or pizza is your choice. Many do eat these foods in maintenance but do so occasionally not regularly & you can too if you want. But this is a perfect opportunity to try other recipes or alternatives too. Try a cauliflower based pizza or a high protein, low carb bread for your sandwich, or a no added salt & sugar Peanut Butter. There’s often an alternative.

Don’t be afraid to ask questions, for support or suggestions. There are always people here who have the same or similar experiences.

PS - I used to love a peanut paste sandwich. Fresh white bread with a crunchy crust & smooth peanut paste. Yum! Now I just sometimes have a teaspoon of the paste to satisfy that old memory.

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"peanut paste" Love it! If your sidebar didn't say Queensland, I'd have still known it - it's the only place in the world that uses the term. My cousin is from there and says it. Also...I use peanut flour with a little Water. Tastes basically the same.

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There are days that I am actually HUNGRY and will eat more carbs than I usually would, but they are few and far between. So, I would say that it is ok. It is ok as long as it doesn’t become a daily trend. You have to listen to your body. My doctor has always stressed to stop eating when I am full. I think about this on the days when I am hungry: but, most days it’s not an issue. I am 3 years out and really good and picking my portion sizes.

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Good for you Rachael , i do try my best to stay away from carbs but it's at night that i give in because during the day i do really well and i eat Soups some salads all kinds of chicken steak chili all Protein but like i said it's the damn nights i fall apart like a dummy , plus i am on meds and some of them cause to sleep eat i walk in my sleep and eat and not realize that i am eating my wife used to clean my mess i made when i sleep eat walk but now she leaves it for me to witness and i know she wouldn't screw with me she's not cruel like that, i guess you haven't had your SX yet right, are you close to your date i can't wait until mine , maybe we can keep in touch you can never have to many friends right ?

Coop 😊

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I’m 3 years out from my surgery. I’ve maintained my goal and been the same weight (within 5 pounds) for the last 2 years.

my husband used to sleep eat. When he quit drinking, he stopped sleep eating too. I’m not saying this is the case with you.

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I wish i could help you with the changing of your profile info but i think you need to go to the top right where it says my surgery Click on that then go from there, as far as your husband i admire him now did he just op doing or did he struggle with the sleeping eating i am on lunesta i guess is a big one for sleep walking/ eating i have been on it for years why all of a sudden now am i having issues good for you keeping the weight off, you're an inspiration to a lot of people.😎

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    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

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      · 0 replies
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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

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