Am i wrong for eating a half of a peanut butter sandwich( i try to stay clear of bread) and a whole muffin last night because i feel guilty like i did something wrong, when i am looking for something sweet i eat a keto bar and it does the trick and tonight for dinner my wife and i are getting a pizza and we never get a pizza , am i acting out through food am i being reckless , i don't know i just i have to buckle down and get serious with this program otherwise i could possibly get denied ( am i making any sense) i really believe i am thinking way to much my PCP just put in my consult for gastric bypass and i have my first virtual appt April 1st i guess i am a ways away from my surgery i am a very thorough guy and i like to have things in order beforehand so there are no screw ups when the time comes ,anyway ,i have to be honest when i write a post i am never sure what to say or if i will even get a response , i guess i just need to relax and hopefully i can make some friends in the process.

Have you tried counseling? I'm a big fan of it. It's got me through the journey and my bad eating patterns. I'm over a month post op and having that counseling allows you to see why you do something and what to do instead. My urges to overeat were greatly reduced pre op and now that I'm post op, I have no urges to overeat. I've been with my psychologist for 10 months now. She's the best!

I still eat food I like (that I can tolerate and is part of my plan) and I don't believe in moralizing food. It's people's bad behavior around food that's an issue, not the food.

Moderation is key and learning to eat more protein over carbs is a good idea pre op. An easy way to do that is having a daily protein and calorie goal so you can get the right food in and not overdo it.

Don't beat yourself up for eating things that aren't right for you in the moment either. Part of successful weight loss is believing in yourself and not giving up or beating yourself down so much because of a mistake. I still have my moody days trust me but any good dietician will tell you progress, not perfection. Especially if eating is emotional for you.

Just make sure you're honest with your team and set clear goals and boundaries with food and weight. They're there to help you. Build a treatment team if you feel like you don't have control over what you're eating. And im sure lots other who comment on this thread will have good advice! Welcome to the community.

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Yes i have been in counseling for almost 9 yrs

Thats great! I hope youve been able to work on eating behaviors with the.

You could consider how important this is to you. Really visualize how weight loss surgery will help your life. Find a big reason and keep it in the forefront of your mind. It's not easy and takes will power but having a "because" can really push you along. It's not inherently bad that you've eaten certain foods but really you only know if you're being reckless through food. If the food is triggering for you and keeps you from sticking to a plan, it could be reckless. It's good you find better alternative food items but also think of alternatives that aren't related to food. My therapist always said put distance between you and food. I know your appointment isn't right away but it's coming up! Keep thinking about why you're doing this and put the work in to eat and live in a way that makes you a good candidate for bariatric surgery. The work is up to you at the end of the day. If you make a mistake get back on the horse. You have the rest of your life to enjoy all kinds of food in moderation. The time before your surgery and while you're healing after is a time to take a step back and relearn everything about nutrition and eating down to the core.

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I liked your analogy about am i being reckless through food that is something i never thought about, good point. I have never talked to my therapist about food but i will now that you have planted the seed , BIG GOAL and reason for this SX is i have a really bad back and by having this SX it will take a lot of weight off my back(lower back), not to drastically change the topic but you are very , anyhow i'm from Massachusetts where are you from i swear the older i gert the more i hate the cold in the snow and not in that order LOL.

I seriously do not think i am reckless i am not saying i could not become as such but i think i am pretty honest , i have a great life and i love it and i am real excited about my being in the procces of waiting for the SX my wife as a matter of fact had gastric bypass a long time ago (95) she tries to tell me some info but it was so long ago that she doesn't want to mislead me and i can't you know what i mean.

Coop

Is your therapist experienced with eating disorders & bariatric patients? It’s a more specialised field & just something to consider. Understanding our relationship with food is a huge part of this process & our success.

Wanting to start incorporating improved eating habits now is great. But you don’t have to do everything all at once. Small wins are always best. Make one or two small changes & get them established over a couple of weeks before changing or incorporating something else. Focus on protein. Increase your fluid intake. Then try smaller portion sizes. Up your vegetable intake. Reduce your snacks. Try some new cooking methods & new recipes. You don’t have to do everything at once. It’s not a race.

I know from your earlier post you have an issue with blame & being critical of yourself for perceived failures. I wonder if you asking whether it’s ok or wrong to have a peanut paste sandwich is you subconsciously looking for a way to beat yourself up if you do have the sandwich & people say don’t? It’s also interesting that you question a peanut paste sandwich but not the pizza. Whether you have the sandwich or pizza is your choice. Many do eat these foods in maintenance but do so occasionally not regularly & you can too if you want. But this is a perfect opportunity to try other recipes or alternatives too. Try a cauliflower based pizza or a high protein, low carb bread for your sandwich, or a no added salt & sugar peanut butter. There’s often an alternative.

Don’t be afraid to ask questions, for support or suggestions. There are always people here who have the same or similar experiences.

PS - I used to love a peanut paste sandwich. Fresh white bread with a crunchy crust & smooth peanut paste. Yum! Now I just sometimes have a teaspoon of the paste to satisfy that old memory.

"peanut paste" Love it! If your sidebar didn't say Queensland, I'd have still known it - it's the only place in the world that uses the term. My cousin is from there and says it. Also...I use peanut flour with a little water. Tastes basically the same.

There are days that I am actually HUNGRY and will eat more carbs than I usually would, but they are few and far between. So, I would say that it is ok. It is ok as long as it doesn’t become a daily trend. You have to listen to your body. My doctor has always stressed to stop eating when I am full. I think about this on the days when I am hungry: but, most days it’s not an issue. I am 3 years out and really good and picking my portion sizes.

Good for you Rachael , i do try my best to stay away from carbs but it's at night that i give in because during the day i do really well and i eat soups some salads all kinds of chicken steak chili all protein but like i said it's the damn nights i fall apart like a dummy , plus i am on meds and some of them cause to sleep eat i walk in my sleep and eat and not realize that i am eating my wife used to clean my mess i made when i sleep eat walk but now she leaves it for me to witness and i know she wouldn't screw with me she's not cruel like that, i guess you haven't had your SX yet right, are you close to your date i can't wait until mine , maybe we can keep in touch you can never have to many friends right ?

Coop ?

I’m 3 years out from my surgery. I’ve maintained my goal and been the same weight (within 5 pounds) for the last 2 years.

my husband used to sleep eat. When he quit drinking, he stopped sleep eating too. I’m not saying this is the case with you.

I need to figure out how to change my profile info so that it doesn’t say pre op anymore

I wish i could help you with the changing of your profile info but i think you need to go to the top right where it says my surgery Click on that then go from there, as far as your husband i admire him now did he just op doing or did he struggle with the sleeping eating i am on lunesta i guess is a big one for sleep walking/ eating i have been on it for years why all of a sudden now am i having issues good for you keeping the weight off, you're an inspiration to a lot of people.?