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Body dysmorhia is a bitthhhsssss



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You look awesome

Sent from my SM-G950U1 using BariatricPal mobile app

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You look ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS!! You look slender, fit, and toned.

But I 100% understand where you're coming from. In the past, I lost a lot of weight with WW and was still horrified to have my picture taken. I look back on those pictures now and I don't know what I was thinking. I looked great! I'm sure others around me also thought so too. But there's still a part of us that just can't see what others are seeing. We walk around with those fat goggles on and judge ourselves to death, not letting ourselves enjoy a single victory. I learned from that experience, though. I've learned that my self-perception will be faulty, so I should just trust how good I feel inside and what my wonderful body can do, and ignore the self-sabotaging little voice I hear when looking in the mirror. Because that little voice lies.

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You look great! I do understand where you're coming from though. We see ourselves in the mirror day in and day out so we don't see the weight loss the same as the people around us do. Often times when I look in the mirror, I see myself a few sizes larger than I am. I'm in a large in shirts and 14 in pants, but what I see in the mirror is someone who is at least a 2x in shirts and a 20 in pants. So my mind and reality mess with me. It's funny though that when I pass shop windows as I'm walking into the store or my reflection in something while I'm shopping I sometimes see this much smaller person that everyone else see's but in mirrors at home I still see that bigger version of myself. Body dysmorphia is hard and it really messes with your mind and your self confidence.

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I 100% understand. I was out walking with a friend yesterday - she's one of my friends who has always been fit - runs marathons, hikes, etc... Mentioned how excited I was about my BMI being almost normal and she indicated her BMI is about the same as mine. for the life of me I cannot see myself as close to her level of fit and thin...

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Such a strange thing. When I was fat, I thought I was actually just a bit overweight. I look at the before pictures now and am horrified at the reality. But after losing weight, it's like there was no gauge to accurately judge what I really did look like. I was always looking to see if the distance between my outside thighs and the edge of the chair was the same as someone else, or comparing myself to others at work who wore the same sized scrubs. I kept trying to give myself more space than needed to squeeze between furniture or other objects. It does pass, but it just takes time. It's like we landed on Mars and have to learn stuff all over again.

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You look great! I do understand where you're coming from though. We see ourselves in the mirror day in and day out so we don't see the weight loss the same as the people around us do. Often times when I look in the mirror, I see myself a few sizes larger than I am. I'm in a large in shirts and 14 in pants, but what I see in the mirror is someone who is at least a 2x in shirts and a 20 in pants. So my mind and reality mess with me. It's funny though that when I pass shop windows as I'm walking into the store or my reflection in something while I'm shopping I sometimes see this much smaller person that everyone else see's but in mirrors at home I still see that bigger version of myself. Body dysmorphia is hard and it really messes with your mind and your self confidence.
Rite or if someone takes a flattering pic that u didn't know about and sends it to u...I still see the 300lbs that made me so miserable 20200922_163243~2.jpg

Sent from my SM-N960W using BariatricPal mobile app

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I struggled with my weight so much of my life that I wasn't a healthy weight for my height since I was probably 9 or 10 which is kind of when thing should went south anyway. I was sick from when I was a baby but things changed then.

Of course hitting puberty didn't help. I got bullied growing up including my sister. And things I don't discuss on public forums.

But I will say body dismorphia is a tough one. Especially when you never knew where you fit and never really did fit in anywhere. Or never perceived myself as anything but the fat kid. Or ugly kid. Never saw myself as feminine either.

Ive worn clothes I hadn't like dresses. I tried on a bathing suit, but not in public yet. Every moment it's still a struggle of seeing the fat kid, feeling like the fat kid and being afraid to be that again. So getting comments about my weight even someone saying the word skinny it sets something off. I have no pictures but one from my birthday right before my gastric bypass surgery April last year. That's how much I hated pictures. My mom had to beg me to take a picture recently ...

i took a picture of myself in the swimsuit to convince myself I could wear it but it felt weird. Like sharing the pictures I shared here. It's hard to not fear our efforts will be lost. And it's a continuous journey. Though my road is complicated by many things. We try to prop each other up the best we can.

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    • LeighaTR

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    • Doughgurl

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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