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Don’t want to leave my house.



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12 hours ago, gabybab said:

This story could have been about me. Today I love to go out, even to eat. I can sit in a booth now and I have extra room. I don't feel like people are staring at me. I still have a long way to go, but 69 pounds has broken me out of my shell!

Good luck to you on your journey!

Ahhh yes the stares. I feel like people are staring at me all the time. I'm paranoid when I go out. Its sooo bad.

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14 minutes ago, MarvelGirl25 said:

Ahhh yes the stares. I feel like people are staring at me all the time. I'm paranoid when I go out. Its sooo bad.

It gets better. Swearsies! ((hugs)) I can relate.

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This is exactly why I have invested in an exercise bike because do not want to be gorked at in the gym lol

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2 hours ago, Mikeyy said:

This is exactly why I have invested in an exercise bike because do not want to be gorked at in the gym lol

Yea I bought an elliptical to avoid the gym until I feel comfortable. Baby steps ...

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I retired 3 yrs ago and since I didn't have to go to work anymore, I had become even more reclusive. We own a home, and I garden....only in my back yard. We have a fenced in back yard, so I wasn't visible. My front yard is all hedges and plants that only need to be maintained annually. I was only going out, only about 1 time a week, and then only if I had too.

That crap has started to change already! I realize that I have to fix my thinking about weight and body image as well as my eating. Since I have a surgery date of 10/1, I have begun to get out like other folks do. Heck! I went to the bank yesterday instead of just using the mobile app! I need to get up, get out and get around as activity will be part of my success after I have surgery. You know what I realized? I love Walmart! I saw a lot of people there over the weekend just like me!!!! Who knew?!?

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I definitely know how you feel! As I gained weight I stopped taking care of myself. I stopped doing my hair, dressing up, putting on makeup, and avoided going out unless I had to or if my husband wanted me to go somewhere with him. I felt really self conscious and embarrassed with how I looked and felt like I was the fat girl that everyone stared at and I hated it. Then I got depressed because of my weight and gained even more weight on top of that lol.

Thankfully as I started losing weight I’m started to get back a lot of confidence and find myself wanting to be out more and active. I still have my moments tho, but it’s getting better. Hang in there ❤️

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I remember Richard Burton, the Actor, saying He was innately painfully shy but nobody believed him. He was such a Good Actor he donned a Facade and nobody knew the Real Richard inside. This has some + but a Whole Lot of - and that was difficult to constantly maintain.
What might look like slothful laziness to others might be "You being Kind to You", nobody can blaze forth on all burners without getting a little singed yourself. And in the long run, YOU were not. put on this 🌎 Earth just to pleases others but to live, love, appreciate and respect YOU, when all else fades, How Did You Treat You? Have I always been this bright? Nope, spent years and years, from my parents who werent sure a daughter was a Good Idea, through a husband who thought I should only be an extension of HIM and unto children , at least 1 of the 3 , did and still takes Me for granted, oh I was an Handy Doormat for everyone to Wipe their feet on, not until my Bariatric decision, where I said ITS TIME FOR ME, after the parents and my husband the Late Lamented had died, the children had acheived Adulthood, did I take the time to Believe in ME, that I deserved a chance to LIVE instead of dying OBESE, SAD and in PAIN. And when I finally grew up into Real Person-hood I have been accused of being strident, well maybe I am making up for years and years of being Victorine the Victim--- I am a Thinner Resilent Winner and I'm Living with a new-Found Gusto, had their opportunity to KILL ME, didn't and they'll need to just live with it NOW!

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Hello. I’m new to all this and only a few days away from my surgery. The moment this all started – – the preop stuff – – I started feeling much heavier. There has to be something psychological about it. I even went to a counselor because I suddenly felt heavier than I’ve ever been in my lifeAlthough my physical form has not changed. It has made the days leading up to the surgery absolute agony in that I cannot wait to get this done. What an amazing experience and I hope our journeys are both positive and ultimately successful. Good luck

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07/21/2019 04:30 PM, AnnieD78 said:

So... this is kinda personal. But I’m wondering if prior to surgery anyone had this same feeling. With the size I have gotten, I don’t want to go anywhere or do anything on the weekends. I go to work 5 days a week and I’m visible and walking around all over there. But then the weekend comes and all I want to do is lay on the couch. And it’s even easier to be a shut in now that I can just have my groceries delivered. It’s a combination of not having the energy and being ashamed and just... not caring to do anything. My surgery is August 12 and it’s like this beacon in my life. I hope when I lose weight that I will want to go out and be seen and DO THINGS.
I relate to this 100 percent. I felt the same way. I’m almost 2 months out from VSG and I will tell you I already feel so much better. I have lots more to go but am down over 50 pounds from where I started and have so much more energy. I love that I can stay busy most of the day and not worry at all about what I’m going to eat next.
My experience for the most part has been all positive and I’m excited for you to join us on this side😊

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I felt that for sure prior to surgery. I hated going out and my husband would drag me to hang out with friends and I would be miserable the entire time. Post op I had it a little bit because i felt crappy after surgery (sore, tired of the liquid diet) and I didn't go out often. But once I started feeling a little better (maybe 3 weeks post op?) I started really enjoying going out. I felt better in general and people I knew would make comments saying I looked smaller or happier and that really boosted my confidence.

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@MarvelGirl25 We're surgery twins! I'm getting so nervous but so excited!

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39 minutes ago, apiane said:

@MarvelGirl25 We're surgery twins! I'm getting so nervous but so excited!

Yessss me too!! I still have so much to do before the surgery but I cant stop thinking about it! I'm ready for this change. We got this ❤️ :)

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On 07/21/2019 at 16:30, AnnieD78 said:

So... this is kinda personal. But I’m wondering if prior to surgery anyone had this same feeling. With the size I have gotten, I don’t want to go anywhere or do anything on the weekends. I go to work 5 days a week and I’m visible and walking around all over there. But then the weekend comes and all I want to do is lay on the couch. And it’s even easier to be a shut in now that I can just have my groceries delivered. It’s a combination of not having the energy and being ashamed and just... not caring to do anything. My surgery is August 12 and it’s like this beacon in my life. I hope when I lose weight that I will want to go out and be seen and DO THINGS.
I am soo glad that you wrote this. I’m exactly the same way. I’m at my highest weight & just feel disgusting. We were boaters & my summers were always outside & active. This summer I’ve been to the pool 2x compared to last summer 4-5x week. I’m holding on to 8/12/19 because that’s my date too so we’re twins!!!

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    • CrowLuv

      Down 31 pounds in my first month! OK, so a month and two days, but I'm counting it anyway. 😆
      At this point, I'm doing well overall. According to surgeons' instructions, I'm on soft foods for another week-ish. I'm so ready for solids - the soft foods can be such "sliders" and I have to be extra, extra careful.
      For example, my refried beans + dollop of plain Greek yogurt + tomatillo salsa verde became a problem. I never felt satisfied and felt I could have easily had a much bigger serving. Then, far worse was when I made homemade hummus - holy cow it is SO GOOD, but again - felt like I could have downed a quart, no problem. 😂
      It's (for me at least) extremely challenging to "eat mindfully" when the food is that soft. I mean for crying out loud, there's nothing to "chew on"! 😂
      So, couple of days ago - I committed to no more refried beans and no more hummus. Farewell my delicious friends. Going to focus on chicken and tuna and eggs for the time being (ground up til mushy, of course). 
      I'm hoping that once I get the go-ahead to introduce solids I will be able to feel the restriction. Because honestly? I'm only a month in, and I feel NO restriction. It's frustrating, but not the end of the world. Willpower was never my problem. But I'm so looking forward to that feeling I hear a lot on here when people say "Oh I ate half an egg and was SO STUFFED." This has....not been my experience. 😕
      Really hoping that's because my foods are so mushy/soft right now. We shall see. 
      Regardless, I'm 100 percent committed. I hear over and over how this tool is the most powerful for about a year, maybe/possibly a wee bit more. I will not sabotage that for the world. 
      So - doing my happy dance at 31 pounds down - I'm in a "weight decade" I haven't seen in a very long time. And it only gets better from here! 
      · 1 reply
      1. Bastian

        Fantastic! Well done on the beans and hummus restriction, :D :141_dancer:

    • veisor  »  Panda333

      Hi!
      Thank you for replying.   It means the world to me.  It also confirmed what I been feeling about which procedure to choose.   I fall into the category as you do and elected the sleeve as it seemed to be less invasive and recovery would be better and faster,  however I am so afraid to regain the weight back since I rarely eat and obesity runs in my family.   I have two siblings that had the bypass and they have been successful.  My sister was in the high 400's and is about 140 now and has been for several years since her procedure.  I guess I felt that the sleeve would allow me to have more control, however I realized that I can't control my genetics and that is one of the biggest reasons that I am here.  Yes, I have not always made the best choices but trust me when I say that I have been on the loss and regain + more rollercoaster weight ride for yrs! I have spent so much money as I am sure you have as well as many others who are going through this.  It is not easy and anyone who thinks this is a copout is crazy!!! This has been harder than anything I have done including hiring a personal trainer to kick my butt in the gym! And still with all the gym hours, clean eating "not to mention the clean eating cost" I knew it was time that I moved to the next step to finally be who I know in my head and heart cause when I see myself in the mirror,  well let's just say is not the girl I see in my mind. 
      So thanks again for your reply and I hope that we can keep in touch through our journey. 
      😊
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    • AggiG

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    • Pookeyism

      I'm going in for a sleeve revision October 4th. It worked well for me, and I am not back to my starting weight. However, a revision is strongly encouraged at this time (there are additional medical issues). I have decided to forgo the insurance process, even though I know I would eventually be approved. "Eventually" is the key issue here. I have a small window to create this to where it will not impact my work or home life as much, and waiting for the insurance approval would take over a year.
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    • ms.sss

      I just read @BoredCW's status post and also want to lament the loss of my butt.  Looking at me the side, my back is basically flat from my neck to my knees.  My jeans have lovely fabric folds draping from my backside from lack of filling.
      Two days ago, I was sitting on a worn couch at the gym and I could feel the springs and count how many I was sitting on.  Told the Kid and she said she wants to find her childhood alphabet fridge magnets in the basement to spell out words and have me sit on them and do some "butt-braille-reading" 😂
      · 5 replies
      1. FluffyChix

        HI-LAR-ious! I love your kid!!!

        Yeah, we all suffer from noassatall syndrome. :(

      2. 2Bsmaller18

        Yes. I think the spandex in jeans is the only thing that helps keep the sag below the pockets form looking ridiculous. Even leggings wrinkle there.

      3. ms.sss

        Ah, our disappearing collective butts.

        I am seriously considering changing my plastics plan. I am booked for an arm lift in December, but my summer obsession with arm exercises has improved the look of them quite a bit to the point that I think I may hate my butt more than my arms. Should I do a butt lift instead?!?! In conjunction with?!?!?

        I am trying to cultivate an obsession with butt exercises but its not working so far...

      4. 2Bsmaller18

        I don't think you could do both at the same time. For me personally it's arms. I have granny wrinkles down to my elbows. I can always dover my body with tshirts, pants, etc but unless I wear long sleeves my arms are an issue. I also can't wear a small enough jacket since it fits everywhere but too tight in the arms. They measure around 13.5 inches. Can you compromise and get the smaller arm lift. I don't know if that saves much $ or recovery but if your arms improved that much maybe just a tweek will work?

      5. ms.sss

        The difference in price for a mini arm lift and the full arm lift at my surgeon is less thank 2K and probably not worth the savings. May as well pay the extra bit and get the full arm lift as my sag also reaches my elbows. You are right though, my arms see the light of day way more than my butt does...I'll have to see if the continued butt exercises will change my mind down the road (but it's looking more and more that a butt lift is in my future)

        P.S. At the beginning of my 2 week pre-op diet, my upper right arm measured 17.75 inches in circumference. Now its 10. And that is with the extra skin still.

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