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I haven’t told many people at my work that I was having surgery. I have been an MA 20 years and currently work in a dr’s office and get along well with everyone (most of the time) I have seen and heard very judgmental things be said before about overweight people and subsequently WLS. Today one of the RN’s walked in on a conversation that I was having with the person who will be covering for me. She looked at me like I had two heads and I said to her “that is exactly why I have not told people”. She said fine, I want to lecture but I won’t, I will just say I hope it goes well for you!!
My surgery is tomorrow morning and now I am having such anxiety, why do people think that we take this decision lightly. I have been doing research on this issue since 2015. I was in my last month of supervised diet in April of 2015 when my mom was diagnosed with cancer and died on May 5, 2015. I am so glad I didn’t go through with it then, I wasn’t ready. I have let 3 years pass and have done some serious work on “me” and I am ready now! I just wanted to vent, to not hold this negativity in when I go for my surgery tomorrow morning. Thank you for listening ❤️

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I'm sorry you had to hear that BS! All of my doctors were pushing me to have WLS years ago because they knew how truly helpful it can be to patients. I'm sorry that you have to deal with that ignorance. Know you're making the right choice and best of luck tomorrow!

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I am very sorry that this so called "Educated Nurse" had to say that to you. People that have gone through the struggles of trying to lose weight should hold their tongues like my momma told me "If you can't say anything nice then keep you mourh shut!!! Good luck on your surgery!!♀️🧚‍♂️🧞‍♀️♀️

Sent from my SM-S767VL using BariatricPal mobile app

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I am very sorry that this so called "Educated Nurse" had to say that to you. People that have gone through the struggles of trying to lose weight should hold their tongues like my momma told me "If you can't say anything nice then keep you mourh shut!!! Good luck on your surgery!!♀️🧚‍♂️🧞‍♀️♀️

Sent from my SM-S767VL using BariatricPal mobile app


Have not.

Sent from my SM-S767VL using BariatricPal mobile app

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Just keep in mind, you most likely have done in depth research about what you're about to go through. Odds are, they have not. They are going off what they heard from Oprah over 20 years ago or other pseudo "experts" out there. They're ignorant. And I do mean that to be mean, but they are, they don't know that they don't know what they're talking about.

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I saw a motto on my Inspiration App today, you brought it to my mind
Attention: ,,,,,, your days as a larva worm have now expired.
Your new bright Butterfly Wings have just been delivered.
God Bless and keep you, now and in the future! Happy Surgery Day my friend!

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Ugh, that’s awful! I am a nurse and debating about whether to tell coworkers about my upcoming surgery. I don’t want to deal with those reactions and negative comments! I have told one of my co-workers who I consider a close friend. I was relieved she was very supportive of me. I’m really sorry your co-worker couldn’t be!

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I've been very fortunate to have highly supportive coworkers, but honestly it wouldn't matter to me...because I know that this is right for me and that i've done a ton of research. Please don't let anyone with negativity in their hearts cause you even one moment of self doubt or worry...it just isn't worth it :)

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I’m so sorry to hear you are going through anxiety and that part of it was fueled by coworker and nurse.

I’m getting my surgery next month and I’m a doctor. I decided to just tell everyone a year ago, don’t ask me why, I just did, and I have heard so many different opinions coming from fellow doctors and nurses, but to my surprise, most of them have been of support and motivation.

One of the few people who was against it (like I asked for her permission???) was as girl who went to med school with me. She actually got mad at me and told me she was disappointed (what?), anyways, after speaking to so many people about my surgery I can confidently say, her words were not coming from a professional place but from a preconceived notion, funded by judgment and lack of information.

This is such a long journey, and you don’t need everyone’s support, just the people you care for and really matter.

That silly nurse’s jaw will drop when she sees how well you are doing after the surgery, and how much work you put into it, and how GOOD and Healthy you look!

Good luck tomorrow!! Wish you all the best!

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Would you believe, and I have been a participant of Bari-Pal for 1 and half years, You Are the very first Physician- participant I have known of! Welcome-Welcome and I do pray your surgery will also be successful. I usually offer to mentor and be a source of wisdom to all the "Newbees" in your case , probably un-needed, but still I call myself the Bariatric Godmother since I am probably the oldest Bari-pal active. I was 73 last 26th of December and will Celebrate my 1st year Surgianniversity on September 5th. Yes, an untypical age for such Major Surgery, but my mantra is:
I WILL MAKE THE REST OF MY LIFE THE BEST OF MY LIFE! And I believe I shall, even though I have had ups and downs, hairpin turns and just missed getting mired in quicksand on my Weight Loss Journey, it still goes forward and I hope to reach all my goals on time. My surgeon gave me quite a compliment. After my surgery he said You may be 72 externally, but inside you are more like a 45 year old internally. I compliment you on such good care!" And I was very fearful of NASH but went on his " Liver- shrinking Diet" the entire month of August, and made my liver smooth, sleek and smaller in size. Made it an easier procedure for him and a less pain-ridden recovery for me! So let's agree to be friends, you never can have too many of THOSE!

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19 hours ago, Scarlettsgrandma said:

I haven’t told many people at my work that I was having surgery. I have been an MA 20 years and currently work in a dr’s office and get along well with everyone (most of the time) I have seen and heard very judgmental things be said before about overweight people and subsequently WLS. Today one of the RN’s walked in on a conversation that I was having with the person who will be covering for me. She looked at me like I had two heads and I said to her “that is exactly why I have not told people”. She said fine, I want to lecture but I won’t, I will just say I hope it goes well for you!!
My surgery is tomorrow morning and now I am having such anxiety, why do people think that we take this decision lightly. I have been doing research on this issue since 2015. I was in my last month of supervised diet in April of 2015 when my mom was diagnosed with cancer and died on May 5, 2015. I am so glad I didn’t go through with it then, I wasn’t ready. I have let 3 years pass and have done some serious work on “me” and I am ready now! I just wanted to vent, to not hold this negativity in when I go for my surgery tomorrow morning. Thank you for listening ❤️

First good luck with your surgery!! I'm glad I have just started my journey (attended the seminar) and looking forward to making some positive changes for ME. This is actually something I was just telling my husband last night...that I'm not telling a lot of people. When they notice the changes I'll just tell them I changed my diet, which is true. I'm very sorry this caused you added stress and anxiety right before surgery. Please don't let other people's negativity derail your journey.

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You have been preparing for this day for years. Don’t let someone’s actions make you question your decisions. I am scheduled for 7/8/19 and I only told my husband. I had an appt for a sleep apnea mouthpiece and when I told the dr. Why I was there she was very nice but an office worker who is larger than me had changed the way she talked to me and looked at me like in disgust. Then I went to my dermatologist and I went over my info with the nurse and did not tell her about planned surgery. When Dr. came in I didn’t realize nurse stayed in the room and I asked him questions about Vitamins etc. for my upcoming surgery. (I have psoriatic arthritis and rosacea) when I said who my surgeon was she bursted out with groans etc. it was so uncomfortable. I asked if something was wrong with my surgeon or anything I should know about etc. I am still upset about it. The dr. Was not happy with her reaction. I don’t think I will be telling anyone at this point. This is my decision and my health. So I see exactly what you mean especially in a medical setting. You are ready. Best of luck to you and please update how you are doing.

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    • Doughgurl

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      · 0 replies
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    • LeighaTR

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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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