Although I do not have an exact date just, I know I am going to have surgery towards the end of May or beginning of June 2019. I have been having appointments since the beginning of this year, but I still have not found the right way in which I should tell my Supervisor that I need the time off for surgery? I did not want to say specifically that it is bariatric surgery/weight loss surgery though. I don't feel ashamed by having this surgery, its just that, to me, this is so personal and I do not feel comfortable with telling anyone at work what I am going to have done. Does anyone have any tips on how I can word it or has anyone been in this same situation? Also, apart of me is wondering if I can actually get the time off needed. I have accrued PTO hours, but Im still figuring out how all of that can work for me. If anyone has any tips or advice or anything in general, I would really appreciate it, this is my first ever surgery and I am new to all of this. Thank you.

Can you talk to your HR dept? I can certainly understand wanting to keep it private.

I'm unfortunately am an open book. I dont care who knows. I was 339 pounds, so I knew people would know just by rapidly losing. Even people at my grocery store noticed lol

Good luck!

Edited May 5, 20197 yr by gabybab

Asking HR for advice is a good idea. I took two weeks of "vacation." The surgery was a personal, private issue for me. I did not tell any of my co-workers. Only my immediate family knows. To me it cuts down on the questions, speculation etc.

Tell them your going to take care of some personal things and need to be out for _____

Going through HR is a good idea, but otherwise you can say something like, "I'm having a medical procedure done and I will need X number of days off to undergo the procedure and recuperate." If your supervisor asks what it is, you can say anything you want. You can shut down further questions by saying "It's personal" or "I don't feel comfortable discussing my health with you." You aren't required to be specific. HR can help you there, with what information you absolutely must furnish. Does your company have FMLA?

it’s tough because some people like to push for details as i found with my hysterectomy .... but just saying you need time for a medical procedure should be enough if you don’t want to use other leave. hope the conversation goes well

I'm in HR. Tell your local HR person that you need to apply for a medical leave of absence (MLOA). If you are in the US, there are privacy laws that protect your medical information. Your company would be at risk of violating the HIPPA laws if someone at the supervisor level pressed for medical details. All they need to know is you need MLOA for a procedure and that you expect to be out from x/xx/19 through x/xx/19.

https://www.hhs.gov/hipaa/for-individuals/guidance-materials-for-consumers/index.html

Got the perfect retort for nibby co'worker.
I JUST FOUND YOUR NOSE, IT WAS RIGHT IN THE MIDST OF MY BUSINESS !
❤&?today coming your way!

I went through the same. I just told my boss I was having surgery. He never asked what kind and if he did I would have said it was personal. I took two weeks off work and was paid through my companies short term disability while off. Because my insurance covered the surgery and I had a doctors recommendation for being off after surgery, everything was covered 100%. My HR rep did have to get paperwork from my doctors office so they probably know what the surgery was for but they are not allowed to share that info with anyone either. I’ve still not told people at work I had this surgery. I feel it’s personal and none of their business. Of course I’ve lost weight and people notice but they have also seen me dieting and I think assume it’s because of my diet change that I’ve lost the weight.

I kept mine private and only told HR and my supervisor that I was having a procedure done and that I didn't want to discuss it. They left it alone, but the hardest part wasn't hiding the nature of the procedure, it comes when you have to do liquids and purees during your lunchtime.

I am fortunate enough to be close to the microwave at work so being able to heat up vegetable and meat purees was a quick thing for me, but I also have to smell it when someone burns the popcorn too....

Congratulations on making the decision to better your life! It's not easy but it is worth it! I was lucky, when I told my boss he was understanding and didn't press for details but I know he assumed it was for "female" stuff. If someone asked me, that's what I would have (actually probably did) said because I didn't (and still don't) want my co-workers to know my business.

I suggest going through HR if your not comfortable talking to your supervisor. Depending on your job and your recovery you could need as little as a few days or as much as several weeks to recover. Just be prepared in the event you need extra time. Like Mike says above, know your rights and work within the proper channels.

Good luck on your journey!

LOL FLHappyGirl. Saying "female stuff" usually shuts down all the questions. Employers and managers aren't supposed to ask "what for?" when you tell them you need surgery. You could even just say medical issues if you wanted.

I personally reached out to my HR first. I don't know it would be the same for you, but my HR person said it would be best if I also informed my supervisor. I don't know if that could be avoided entirely for you? If not, just keep it vague - all they really need to know is you are having a medical procedure done. If they ask for more, just say it's personal. From my understanding, they cannot force you to tell them exactly what you are having.

HR should NEVER tell you that you have to tell your supervisor what kind of surgery, it is absolutely none of anyone's business. All they need to know is your time off for recovery, and any restrictions upon returning to work. Nothing else impacts the business but that, unless you are epileptic or diabetic or require possible emergency treatment at work like an epi-pen. Otherwise you can always claim a hernia repair if you feel pressure to reveal anything.

apply for FMLA. it is private. HR will know but your SUP only needs to know how long you will be out.