I Failed myself.

[polly... 71]

Hi, I had my RNY done back in 15. I did not adhere to my doctor's suggestion of the South Beach Diet. Reasons shmeezuns. I never lost much weight, 35#'s +/-. I still weigh 35#'s from my surgery weight. I am mobility impaired, I'm scheduled to help that soon, so I can get out and swim at the YMCA. Just joined. Imobility and refusal/fear of following the diet have ruined me. I'm not offering excuses, but I ask two things in all seriousness....is it too late for me to try again, and actually lose 100 to 150 pounds? Is my stomach shot for good?

[summerset 5,261]

So you've lost 35 lbs and maintained that 35 lbs loss?

If that's the case you're still far better off than those who've lost a ton and regained that ton. How's that for starters?

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If your pouch is "shot for good" or not, nobody here can now. Do you still feel some restriction? What and how much do you usually eat?

[polly... 71]

Thank you. I feel restriction if I eat a normal adult sized meal, as opposed to my usual smaller quantities. I eat all foods, good and bad, 3 to 4 times a day. Ease is key, as I live with very painful mobility (hopefully for the moment only!) I don't eat much, just the wrong choices.

[Healthy_life2 8,319]

Another option to think about is counseling/therapy. It can help with the fear of following your meal plan and your relationship with food.

Sent from my SM-G920T using BariatricPal mobile app

[polly... 71]

Thank you, I've been in therapy for a few things for years. I think it's time I address what you've mentioned. 😊

[summerset 5,261]

Whatever you do: ask yourself the question if you're willing/able to do that forever or at least for a very long time.

[polly... 71]

Good point. I'm talking to my husband right now about the work I'm going to have ahead of me and the mental/ financial stress it's going to bring about. But I have this very strong pull to just do it. Either I do it or I don't, right? As for the forever, I think "forever" is the point however I can only survive if I think in the AA way, take it one day at a time. But forever is ideal.

[Frustr8 7,886]

Step by step Heidihoo, I believe you can get both your mind and body tuned up into better shape, you're not a lost cause either way. You didn't fail as much as do something disappointing to yourself. Forgive yourself and try,to keep moving on.

[summerset 5,261]

11 hours ago, Heidihoo said:

As for the forever, I think "forever" is the point however I can only survive if I think in the AA way, take it one day at a time. But forever is ideal.

People are different. This day-by-day thing never worked for me. Well, it worked for a while when I was white-knuckling something temporary through (e. g. studying for exams after work) but it never worked longterm.

I personally think it's an interesting mind game when you're asking yourself:

"How does the thought of going to the gym six times a week for the next 30 years make me feel? Do I feel exited? Do I want to run away and hide? Do I want to scream in horror? Am I in doubt that this will work out? Do I really think it's possible considering my daily schedule?"

"How does imagining never eating food xyz feels in my body? Is my heart rate going up a bit? Am I getting nervous? Am I afraid that I'm not "strong enough" to make this happen for the next 30 years?"

I think these mind games are very eye opening in many situations, not only when it comes to eating/exercise/weight. Of course it's not a foolproof 100% working method but I find it to be very helpful, especially when it comes to longer term commitment.

[Frustr8 7,886]

Stop hating what you think are your bad points, instead Celebrate your good points, you really have a lot going good for you if you just stop and think. Never look back, that's not the direction you are headed! 😝