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Advice for a supportive yet high anxiety spouse



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Any advice on how calm my husband's anxiety? My DS (revision from rny 2012) is already scheduled for early Monday Jan 7. He didn't show any sign's of anxiety until literally last night. Tossed and turned leaving both of us restless. He didn't have any anxiety the first time around for me. And it is too late for any dr visit for prescription meds. I think he tried to hold out as much as possible thinking his feelings would pass. But as the day gets nearer it got to be much.I've tried to reassure him I am in great hands and I am doing everything I need to do to prepare preop. He understands I'm doing this (again) for my health, but since there is more risk involved, he can't help but feel overwhelmed. He's worried about the procedure, my recovery in the hospital and at home. My mother has taken time off from work to stay with us at home and help as well as be with me in my hospital stay.

I am naturally nervous and excited, but at this point I'm more worried about him than my own nervousness!! I need some encouraging words for hubby.

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My hubby is also the Nervous Nelly of our house. Remind yours that you've both been through this type of surgery before. Try to get him to focus on the future, not the present. What the two of you will be doing in a year, in 5 years, in 10 years. How does that future look without the surgery? Best of luck with your surgery!

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My hubby is also the Nervous Nelly of our house. Remind yours that you've both been through this type of surgery before. Try to get him to focus on the future, not the present. What the two of you will be doing in a year, in 5 years, in 10 years. How does that future look without the surgery? Best of luck with your surgery!


Thank you for your words of advice. I will certainly talk with him so we can look at the situation from those points!!

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And may tomorrow dawn bright and beautiful for you, may YOUR surgery be successful and may YOUR future be all you desire! Update us on your story as it unfolds, please?

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And may tomorrow dawn bright and beautiful for you, may YOUR surgery be successful and may YOUR future be all you desire! Update us on your story as it unfolds, please?
Thank you very much!!. I will keep you all posted!!

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Hope you’re doing well post-op and that your husband’s worries were for nothing. Welcome to the losing side!

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Hope you’re doing well post-op and that your husband’s worries were for nothing. Welcome to the losing side!
I'm doing well thank you. Had a 4 day stay and still quite sore but happy to be home in my own space. Hubbies anxiety quickly faded after seeing me in recovery. Went straight to caretaker mode. I'm also grateful to my mother for being there the whole time with him/us then and now for emotional support. I can't wait to see my work in progress!!


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