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Support and honesty needed



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Everyone is right about ur husband, just ignore him and do it ! I am 57 and had a BMI of 35 and had spent years trying to get to my goal weight through starvation and extreme exercise , it didn’t work after menopause . I was sleeved 10 days ago and am down 20lbs . I’m not hungry and have never vomited . A little nauseau occasionally right after surgery but now I don’t even take the zofran for it z. I am walking 4.6miles a day and feel great !

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So I had my surgery at 55. I was 260 ish pounds at surgery. My high was over 300 and I'm 5'3". I was wearing a 24. I wear a 6 now. I'm a nationally ranked fencer in my age group and I didn't start fencing until I started to lose weight. (Been fencing 18 months, currently ranked no. 24 among women 50-59 and no. 30 among women over 40). I've lost about 150 pounds. I look hot. I haven't had plastics - if I did, I'd probably be a size 4. I deadlift 235 pounds and squat 225. I vomited when I got e coli from a salad and was sick for four days. I eat pretty much what I want now - so long as I stay under about 1500 calories a day.

Do what you need to do. I only regret not doing this sooner.

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Omg Diane in philly , u rock !💪. I’ve heard that weight lifting is better for weight loss than tons of cardio - is that ur experience ? I’ve been an avid spinner for some time and ride horses competitively so am already in good shape. But some video I watched said if u exercise too much you get hungrier ?

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7 hours ago, ShrinkingTN- hopefully said:

Thank you so much for all the awesome advice and support. I do have other comorbidity factors and my weight keeps climbing no matter how much I exercise. You have all helped me so much. It’s really reinforced how much I want to do this. This is more support and advice I’ve had in anything. Thank you all so much! ❤️ I’m very greatful.

You could have zero comorbidities and just wanted to be cute. Still valid and worthy. Don't ever have to justify wanting the best for yourself.

❤ Live your best Life ❤

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Drop 150-whatever pounds overnight by dropping the husband!
It amazes me how unsupportive some partners can be. How can you look the person you supposedly love in the eye and tell them that they are going to fail at something they want to do?
My hope is that you find some people who truly support and love you in this upcoming year!

Sent from my SM-G960U using BariatricPal mobile app

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Many of us Bariatric People would. have smoother pathways if We only could Encourage 👍Our Supporters and Eliminate👎Our Detractors.

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My primary care doctor is the one who recommended surgery to me because he said women over 50 nearly never manage to lose and keep the weight off without some kind of procedure, so there goes your husband's argument about age. I had all of these conversations with myself leading up to surgery and what convinced me was the week before surgery, when I started my liquid diet one day early - I found out midday that I was a day early and immediately went out and ate a meal I shouldn't have. When there is no immediate medical issue at stake, I cheat, cheat, cheat on diets. Kind of an extreme way to discipline myself, but it is working. There is too much at stake for me to cheat on this. I am in week 3 and already feel better and have more confidence in myself than I ever have. You do what is right for you - he will have to acknowledge you were right soon enough!

Sent from my Pixel 2 XL using BariatricPal mobile app

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I had surgery in April and it has not been easy, but it is the best thing ever. I was constantly losing weight and putting it back on and more. My husband was scared for my surgery, but I turned him around by explaining the process. I had 6 months with a nutritionist prior to surgery and saw a psychologist too (this was the most helpful). I am down 90 lbs with mostly walking. I have only thrown up once, but it was from eating an overly sweet dessert.

I have a bunch of foodies in my house, I now just eat a little form their plates when we go out or I order a small appetizer. My back no longer hurts (I was considering back surgery), I am no longer diabetic and no longer have high blood pressure. I finally told myself I deserve to be taken care of and I did and continue to do the homework.

Good luck on your journey whatever you decide.

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Have you tried diet and exercise before and it didn't work? For me that was what happened and I wanted something that would be long term. Lipo is short term and very expensive, surgery was covered by my insurance so it wasn't really a question for me. If you are concerned about the hubby's support I suggest going to a therapist (both of you, separately and together) to get everything out.

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I was 50 at the time of my surgery and even though I have yet to reach my weight loss goal things are still moving along slowly. So don't let your husband get you down, everyone here is offering excellent advice and I think that should bolster your confidence to do what you need to do to take care of you!

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I struggled with hunger horribly once my lap band was removed. Tried all sorts of medical interventions because my husband was not on board with surgery. After 9 months and a 30 pound weight gain enough was enough. 5 months out from sleeve, 55 pounds down now. Still love to eat, but am so relieved I am satisfied with a smallish portion.

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Hi,

You need to do you as others have said. Talk with your providers and share your concerns. For your husband, well I would recommend he focus on his recovery - going to meetings, getting a sponsor if he doesn't already have one, and work the steps. He needs to keep his side of the street clean. I will say that he is probably scared like you may have been scared when he was actively using. Both individuals in a relationship need room to grow and become their best selves however that works for each person. Relationships can be challenging with the changes so you may want to consider couples' counseling for support with each other's recovery process. Best wishes.

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My father was sleeved a few years ago and he is now 70. He able to move around more than he was. I was sleeved this past Monday 1/7. Keep your chin up. I find when my spouse may not be giving me the greatest motivation for what I have done this far I go on this to look for inspiration. My HW was 358, SW 302, CW 298

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I actually had the surgery before my wife did. I was sleeved on May 10 of last year and she was sleeved on October 10. It certainly helped with us both going through it at roughly the same time. However, at the end of the day you are the captain of your own ship. If you want the surgery, have the surgery. However, go in knowing it isn’t the easy way out. Losing weight and keeping it off with the sleeve is hard work. You’ll be logging food, exercising and eating right. Being sleeved certainly makes it easier to get rolling but you still have to be committed to changing your lifestyle.

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I’m so sorry your husband said these things to you : (
I’m 50, I was 5’2 and 220, I’m 141 and still 5’2,lol
You can do this!! Don’t let his crap keep you from feeling better about yourself.
Life is really great on the other side. I was lucky that I had no complications. My meals taste great, they’re much smaller but so much better for me.
I wish you the best of luck and I hope your husband comes around on the idea.
You deserve this and your husband should support you as you supported him, but if he doesn’t, you take care of you ❣️

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