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Online dating - shady or no?



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I have tried online dating. It just doesn’t seem to work out. In fact, I hate it after a horribly bad experience. I don’t do bars, no single guys my age at church...any suggestions?

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I met my husband online 13 years ago. It might not work for everyone - and certainly I met some losers before I found my prince - but for me it was awesome! Good luck!!

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I didn’t think there were any other options these days.

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8 hours ago, elcee said:

I didn’t think there were any other options these days.

This is pretty much the truth!

Online isn't necessarily any shadier than any other way of dating. There are good people and bad people out there, no matter what.

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I met my husband online, too! You just have to be careful like with any thing, and I think you do better with sites you pay for.

Sent from my SM-N960U using BariatricPal mobile app

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Shady? Not at all. I met my wife online.

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Hmm. Not any more shady than meeting someone at the bar. I think it's hard to meet people anywhere but online these days.

Sent from my SM-G960U using BariatricPal mobile app

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I've gone on several dates from online sites and none of them were "bad". They didn't work out or anything, but no different than randomly meeting someone out in the real world. You never truly know what you're going to get. lol. The people I've ever actually dated I always met through friends. And let me just say that my friends, personally, have a crappy choice in men for me, so I don't recommend relying on your friends to hook you up with anyone. LOL. I'm hoping that somehow, magically, me just going to work and going straight home every day... someone will just happen to fall into my lap without me putting in any effort whatsoever.

Maybe the paid online dating sites are better than the free ones? Maybe people are more serious when they are paying for the subscription. I may try that some day. Match or something.

Edited by mousecat88

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I figure he will find me.... whether it be online ( not that i go to online dating sites LOL) at church, in town, wherever. I will just do me for now and focus on me and if something is meant to be.. it will find me.

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I figure he will find me.... whether it be online ( not that i go to online dating sites LOL) at church, in town, wherever. I will just do me for now and focus on me and if something is meant to be.. it will find me.
I totally agree! I'm not in a hurry for anything especially since I have not had my surgery yet, however I am an empath and I've noticed that I connect more with guys who are quote-unquote broken.[emoji58] I have already been married I have been divorced for almost eight years and being alone sucks!

Sent from my SM-G960U using BariatricPal mobile app

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I think it's easier for women. I have messaged about 300 women and got a response on less than 10 and no dates. I have concluded I am undesirable, at least relative to the competition. I would waste so much time poring over their profiles and trying to come up with clever messages only for them to be read and ignored. Now I hardly message. When I do, it's a copy and paste message. I also only message the most attractive profiles. If I get a response, which I have yet to, I'll go back and read their profile to determine if they are crazy. If they are, I'll simply ignore them.

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I met my wife on Match.com 9 years ago, so it definitely works.
Stay away from the free sites like Plenty of Fish or OK Cupid this will help to weed out losers.
Be very picky of who you go out with.
Be very up front about what you are looking for.
You may have to have a few bad first dates before you meet someone you want to pursue a relationship with.

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Stop waiting around for Prince Charming. Sometimes you actively have to search for him. The poor idiot might be stuck up a tree himself waiting to be rescued. So do what's necessary to doing him.

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I loved your comment so much that I decided to comment on it! Your point may be truthfully right, however, after few attempts to rescue these "princes" it becomes just unbearable. You'd better find a real "king" with no problems getting to the final destination than a "prince" who needs to be rescued first.
It had taken me many terrifying experiences with the guys from online dating apps until I finally got the point. After the next breakup, just sit, listen to your heart, watch a movie https://breakupangels.com/tag/movies/ suggests and STOP SEARCHING FOR ANYONE. Your possible perfect match, or significant other, or call it whatever you want, will find you one day very spontaneously and unexpectedly...

Edited by WandsKingers

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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