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Unsuccessful at MY goal?



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(Removed picture for personal/job reasons, sorry)

On the rants/raves section I caught hell for posting on a weigh goal thread that then turned into a misunderstanding and into someone feeling I was personally attacking her.

Well, it then turned nasty and I got caught up into it. My initial goal was 130. I however re-evaluated myself and decided that I looked good when I was at 135. This weight suits me. I don't feel that I failed at my weightloss goals. Just wanted to show you how unsuccessful I was in other peoples eyes.

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You look good girl. I know exactly what you mean, I am still struggling to loose that last 20lbs. I know I will, but it does not come off as fast as it did before. Take care.

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A goal weight is simply that "our goal" weight. Whether it be 135 or 200, we all have to decide for ourselves what we want to weigh, period. Then, we have to Go for it!

You look great! And more importantly, you feel great and that my dear is what counts!

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I just started reading that thread and realized I couldn't stand some of those comments! I don't see how it's anyone's business what goal another chooses and why he or she chooses it, and that goes for "high" goals as well as "low" goals. This is supposed to be a SUPPORT board, not a board where we judge one another for the decisions we make. Haven't we been judged enough?

Anyway, I'd love to look as good as you do in that pic! Congratulations!

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I understand changing goals!!

First of all, do any of us really remember what we looked like way back when we passed that magical number?

My tentative goal is 120. But I may get happy with myself before then. I want to base it on how I look and feel :(

I think you look fabulous!!!

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Your goal is your goal. You look beautiful, BTW. :(

I also think that our goals may change. I was very happy when I hit 215 back during my first year of being banded. It was a major change from being 300 pounds :) I wore a size 16... I was fit... I loved running. There are many who start their weight loss surgery experience at that weight... but for me, it was very comfortable. Then a few months down the road, my weight started to drop again...without a lot of effort. So I went with the flow. BUT... had I stayed at 215, I would have been quite happy.

Five pounds is not a big difference in terms of weight. But many find that the lifestyle changes necessary to get that extra five pounds (or extra 20 pounds) off aren't worth it. Embrace your goal. It's completely personal.

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I KNOW you've never doubted this, but it bears repeating, the only person's opinion that truly matters is your own.

That said you look absolutely FAB-U-LOUS!!!

At 5'2" and pushing 40. I'm on track for being in the low 150's and a size 6/8 before the end of the year. Like you my original goals (weight wize that is) were lower. But I never expected to get down to trouser sizes this low and am starting to re-evaluate my goals.

Unlike some people on this site I've never really been happy with myself. I realize my size, small or large should not be how I judge my happiness but that has always been easier said than done. I'm not saying I will never re-evaluate my goals again and push to get down into some medical charts guideline for being a "healthy" weight. But I've finally decided to quit waiting for that day to happen before I'm happy with who I am. Some (NOT on lapbandtalk, relatives actually) have suggested by doing this I am giving up on myself and my health. Ironically other relatives and in some cases the same ones on different days have suggested I've become obsessed and have already lost too much. I envy posters like yourself who love yourselves for where you are at wether it is at a lighter goal or heavier, so for me deciding to accept my current weight as my goal is not so much a choice to no longer lose weight but a choice to no longer use it as an excuse not to love myself for who I am on this journey wether I've reached the end or not.

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I believe you caught hell for some exceedingly nasty comments on there, and for being the one that started it all by intimating that Chickie was too scrawny and that you felt you'd look truly awful at her weight.

I also believe you accused her of being obsessed with herself and of attention seeking by continuing to draw attention to her photos, seeking comments about how beautiful she is. Ironic eh?

I also believe that debate was about "excuses" for remaining obese and insisting that it was healthy, about assuming that people that get to goal and below are obsessive or exercise too much, not about fine tuning 5lb or 10lb. You were the one that initially made Chickie out to be silly for going below YOUR weight, not the other way around. And you're either thick or deliberately choosing not to see that fact.

But for what it's worth, on the outside you're beautiful, seriously, you're a stunner, I'd kill for your skin and your hair. I would never look at you and think oh, you need to lose a few pounds.

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I do not want to get into a debate with you or anyone over what happened on the other thread. We each have very strong opinions and will apparently never agree on the goal subject.

I would never look at you and think oh, you need to lose a few pounds.

This is exactly what I was talking about. Just because certain people feel some of us are failing ourselves short by not getting to a smaller number. I too thought I wanted to be thinner, but I re-evaluated myself and decided that I was at a point in my life and weight were I felt content and healthy. Each and everyone of you should decide where you want to be. Don't listen to others, this is your choice and only your choice. My face was starting to look older and wrinkly and I was starting to look horrible. So I thought if I would have continued to lose more weight, I would have been thinner, but saggy and wrinkly in my face. And I did not want that for me..

And I truly do appreciate the postitive compliments. (although that is not what I am after) I am just trying to show that I am happy at MY GOAL WEIGHT. I do not desire to be thinner, I am not jelouse of those who are. I love my band, I truly do..and I thank God that I was able to get this tool to help me fight the weight monster. And like everyone else some days are easy and other days are hard, but hey that is just life.

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