Surgery

[Hollymarie36 3]

This is a very touchy subject. One that I’m even ashamed to be saying. Last night I found out I’m 4 weeks and 5 days pregnancy. I’m scheduled for surgery in 19 days. I already have 2 kids, and I’m a single mom. I’m doing the surgery because I need to be healthy. I have prior health issues and my last pregnancy took a toll on my body. It caused more health issues than anything. I’m scheduled to have an abortion on Tuesday. The doctor said that I could still have surgery since it’s a little over 2 weeks away. My friends surgeon said that you need to wait at least 3 months. And I read somewhere else that you should wait 6 weeks. What do you guys think? This is already the second time I rescheduled the surgery and I already bought the plane tickets to go and get it done. It’s a few states away. Any insight would help!

[MommaPam 0]

I hope that you will reconsider the abortion. You will never regret giving your child a chance at life. Even if you give it up for adoption. The surgery can be done after the birth, right? (I’m also a single mom, with a special needs child. )

[Bryn910 519]

I say do what is right for you health wise. If I were in your situation, I would do the same. It is clear that you aren’t ready for another child based on what you typed.

I wish you luck in whatever you choose

[Pearldrop 164]

52 minutes ago, Hollymarie36 said:

This is a very touchy subject. One that I’m even ashamed to be saying. Last night I found out I’m 4 weeks and 5 days pregnancy. I’m scheduled for surgery in 19 days. I already have 2 kids, and I’m a single mom. I’m doing the surgery because I need to be healthy. I have prior health issues and my last pregnancy took a toll on my body. It caused more health issues than anything. I’m scheduled to have an abortion on Tuesday. The doctor said that I could still have surgery since it’s a little over 2 weeks away. My friends surgeon said that you need to wait at least 3 months. And I read somewhere else that you should wait 6 weeks. What do you guys think? This is already the second time I rescheduled the surgery and I already bought the plane tickets to go and get it done. It’s a few states away. Any insight would help!

Sending you hugs & love as you walk down this path, be kind and generous with yourself.

It’s not clear from your post if you spoke with your friends surgeon or if they spoke on your behalf. If your treating doctors are saying all is ok to go ahead and you are ready I’d say go for it. If you need more time, then wait.

[Pearldrop 164]

52 minutes ago, Hollymarie36 said:

This is a very touchy subject. One that I’m even ashamed to be saying. Last night I found out I’m 4 weeks and 5 days pregnancy. I’m scheduled for surgery in 19 days. I already have 2 kids, and I’m a single mom. I’m doing the surgery because I need to be healthy. I have prior health issues and my last pregnancy took a toll on my body. It caused more health issues than anything. I’m scheduled to have an abortion on Tuesday. The doctor said that I could still have surgery since it’s a little over 2 weeks away. My friends surgeon said that you need to wait at least 3 months. And I read somewhere else that you should wait 6 weeks. What do you guys think? This is already the second time I rescheduled the surgery and I already bought the plane tickets to go and get it done. It’s a few states away. Any insight would help!

Sending you hugs & love as you walk down this path, be kind and generous with yourself.

It’s not clear from your post if you spoke with your friends surgeon or if they spoke on your behalf. If your treating doctors are saying all is ok to go ahead and you are ready I’d say go for it. If you need more time, then wait.

[Briswife15 890]

I would go with what your personal surgeon says, not what you've read, or someone else's surgeon. Yours knows you best. Good luck whatever you choose.

HW 246
SW ??
CW 238
Planning on gastric bypass

[Frustr8 7,886]

Hollymarie read my answer in the prochoice thread, it should be a on this page as well. I am s3nding my 💜 and hug to you no matter what. You are and will always be among friends here,okay?

[Brassapple 56]

Talk to your surgeon to see if they will proceed with the surgery. Good luck. It’s a tough decision to make.

[GizzlyKitten 32]

What did your surgeon say regarding wait time?

[Iwanttoseemytoes 36]

This just makes me so sad. I'm so sorry. Personally, I would wait on the surgery. Being pregnant is difficult, I do understand that, but personally i can't imagine that this child doesn't have a purpose in life, even if you give the child up for adoption. I also hope you will reconsider the abortion. Praying for you!! Sending hugs your way. 🙏🙏

[Matt Z 4,140]

Only you can decide what's right for you. Don't let anyone else tell you what you can and cannot do.

As far as the surgery, if your surgeon is aware of the abortion and says you'll be fine to keep your WLS date, then you have your answer. Don't worry about anyone else not performing your surgery, follow the advise of your surgeon.

[Boldilocks 313]

This is a very touchy subject. One that I’m even ashamed to be saying. Last night I found out I’m 4 weeks and 5 days pregnancy. I’m scheduled for surgery in 19 days. I already have 2 kids, and I’m a single mom. I’m doing the surgery because I need to be healthy. I have prior health issues and my last pregnancy took a toll on my body. It caused more health issues than anything. I’m scheduled to have an abortion on Tuesday. The doctor said that I could still have surgery since it’s a little over 2 weeks away. My friends surgeon said that you need to wait at least 3 months. And I read somewhere else that you should wait 6 weeks. What do you guys think? This is already the second time I rescheduled the surgery and I already bought the plane tickets to go and get it done. It’s a few states away. Any insight would help!

If your own surgeon has said that the surgery date will not be a problem, then go with that obviously.

But if there is any question on it, then you could request the medical abortion rather than the d&c perhaps? It involves taking two pills and cramping and discharge like a heavy period. You're so very early, and so many women have losses at this stage that they just assume are periods because they didn't even know they were pregnant. I don't see how that could impact your surgery date?

No judgement here - it's your body and your choice. I used to work at planned parenthood, and the highest demographic of women coming for terminations (and 93% of the work done there is contraception, health screening, pap smears, std testing - not terminations) were in their 30s, married, with 2 or more kids. They just knew that they weren't up to having any more for whatever reason - health, finance, domestic violence, etc.

Sent from my LG-H830 using BariatricPal mobile app

[Frustr8 7,886]

Any updates Hollymarie? Was going over past postings and wondered how you are doing.😪

[Ylime 453]

Ditto to what Matt said - this is your decision and since you didn’t come hear asking for advice on the abortion piece then no one should be pushing their opinions on your personal decision.

It sounds like you’ve made up your mind and done your diligence by checking with your surgeon. It’s perfectly ok to be worried and anxious over major life altering so just try not to stress about it. And know that we’re here whenever you need to vent.

[newmebithebypass 713]

I’m 100% pro you doing what ever you need to do to keep yourself afloat and alive for the kids you have right now plz be kind to yourself no matter what you decide to do